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ugh, i hate this, i'm gonna- *remembers that, even if i'm personally not affected by suicide jokes, i'm not the only one online and seeing them can be distressing for a number of reasons* send someone to the Infinite Spiders Dimension
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“The pen is mightier than the sword.” Bullshit. Never have I seen someone get killed by a pen, but I have seen people get decapitated by the sword. Also, when you say “The pen is” you’re spelling out “the penis” so you lose twice!
Wizard Advice: If an arcane scroll you have to read is especially boring, you can simply summon a Gnome to read it for you!
(Dw guys, the Gnomes are paid in experience its totally ethical ^^)
Scientists will bring back the dire wolf (not even GENUINELY at that) and people will be like “oh that’s so cool”, “yay we’re beating extinction” (they’re not), but when I, a necromancer
Daily reminder that if you are uncomfortable with your small child learning lightning bolt, you should not leave them under my supervision!
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Apprentices these days will turn in three spells with a goblin scratch diagram and call it a grimoire… go ponder the arcane runes another year, peasant.
What is this recent influx of shadow monsters I have been seeing? The other day I was peering out my spire when I spotted a large phantom bonnie?? By the hairs of my beard, I’ve never cast a spell so quickly. I immediately cast Bite of ‘87 and banished this monster back to the realm it came from.
Truly alarming, wizards look out.
Imagining Gale and Tara having a very civil, passive aggressive argument about why Tara should not be eating plastic
