#witchy queue

Despite what social media may want you to believe, you're not a bad person and you shouldn't beat yourself up for having held bigoted beliefs in the past, if you've worked on deconstructing, educating, and improving yourself and your mind, and now you know better and do better.

We are all products of our environments. None of us grew up completely free from bigotry. To paraphrase Ladyspeech Sankofa: unless you've spent your whole life living in a cave, you're not free from the influences of a capitalist society. At one point of another, you simply may not have known better, and that just happens, and it happens to all of us.

You don't have to be any type of witch. You don't have to be Wiccan, Pagan, or of any religion. You don't need deities, spirits, ancestors. You don't need astrology, divination, crystals, sigils.

"Blessed be" has become quite the catch phrase in 21st century spiritual circles, especially among the modern witch communities. It's practically become the witches' version of "I will pray for you", and quite frankly, it's become more and more annoying for many of us to see it and hear it all the time, everywhere.

The phrase originates from a traditional Wiccan ritual, which is included in some Gardnerian initiation ceremonies. During the rite, the High Priest or High Priestess performs on a person what is known as the "Five Fold Kiss", and recites the following words:

Blessed be thy feet, which have brought thee in these ways,

Blessed be thy knees, that shall kneel at the sacred altar,

Blessed be thy womb, without which we would not be,

Blessed be thy breasts, formed in beauty,

Blessed be thy lips, that shall utter the Sacred Names of the gods.

Before Gerald Gardner incorporated the phrase into his Book of Shadows, "blessed be" has already appeared in other religious texts such as the King James Bible ("blessed be the name of the Lord"), which, I would not be surprised, if it were the inspiration for the phrase "blessed be the fruit" in The Handmaid's Tale.

So, as you can see, for the witches who aren't Wiccan, and for the witches who aren't religious at all, this can be an obnoxious thing that gets thrown at all of us constantly. Not to mention, out of context from its original Wiccan ceremony, it's like saying "the body/blood of Christ" outside the context of Communion during a Catholic Mass. It's not even appropriate.

I also maintain my position that "blessing" people as well as praying for people without their consents and/or against their wishes is an invasive thing to do to begin with.

Many witches, religious or not, simply don't want to be "blessed" without asking, by strangers especially, any more than we want to be randomly prayed for. It makes us uncomfortable. We don't want a blessing unless we ask for it, period. It's a boundary that's really not hard to respect.

Before you ask another witch the "I'm a beginner, where do I start/what do I do" question, ask yourself first: "What drew me to witchcraft to begin with? What made me want to become a witch in the first place? What is it that made me want to have a witchcraft practice? What sparked my interest in being a witch?"

All books are written by authors, and all authors are human.

You're going to come across authors who are downright awful and backward with what they write (cultural appropriation, the Burning Times, Wicca = witchcraft, antisemitism, fetishization of native practices, homophobia, etc.), and you're going to come across authors who are much less awful and more progressive with their thinking. But that doesn't mean none of them come with their own imperfections and biases.

I have been asked in the past: "why don't you practice your native religions/worship your native deities?"

The truth is, I do. In many, many ways, I have always done.

See, where and how I grew up, these things are not all a big, mystical, mysterious, holy chunk of light that's its own big bright orb.

The ancestors, the myths, the folklores, the spirits, the mythological beings, the divine; all that I grew up with, I've taken with me everywhere I've been. They've always been with me and they've never left me. They are my culture, my heritage, my lineage, the history and ways of life of my people. They are in my blood. They are a part of who and what I am. They always will be.

They were here when I immigrated to the West from my native land. They were here when I changed my name. They were here when I became a Catholic. They were here when I became a Hellenic Pagan. They were here when I became a witch.

They are intertwined into every step I take on this path that's my life. They are threads interwoven into the tapestry of my spirituality that will remain wrapped around me forever.

This is something that's been on my mind for a while. I'm going to talk about this based on my own experiences and personal thoughts. This may or may not be the case for others, so take it and use it as simply my advice that may or may not be different from others.

My opinion: it is not only impractical, but also impossible, to perform witchcraft with a calm, still, blank, neutral, or peaceful state of mind every time and at all times. In fact, I think it is downright counterproductive and even hindering.

My magic works, because I pour so much of myself into it, and my emotions and feelings and states of mind are all parts of the package. My spells work, because every one of them carries a bit of me in it, and that includes me mentally and emotionally.

I'm going to give you an example dear to my heart here. One year ago, a very close friend of mine suddenly lost someone whom she'd known her whole life. A dear friend of hers died very unexpectedly and tragically in a car crash, and when the shock wore off, she was a puddle on the floor. She sought my help, because she desperately wanted to cope and to move on. So I brought her into my sacred room, cast a circle around the two of us, and the first thing I did was to give her a safe space to cry and let it all out. And I shedded my own tears with hers, because seeing my friend whom I love so much in such grief broke my heart. Then I performed my part of the ritual, and left her with instructions to perform her part. Later, after everything was complete, she came to me and told me that she was "back", that she had let him go, and that although she would continue taking her time to grieve for him, she was able to go on with her life and move forward from there.

Mental health professionals everywhere have their bits to say about human emotions. They will tell us that suppressing and refusing to acknowledge emptions is not healthy and not beneficial to anything. Humans are emotional beings. Emotions make us human. Our emotions make us who we are and give us our powers. Emotions are natural. Repressing emotions is the unnatural thing to do. Being as empathetic as I am, being able to feel so much and so deeply may sometimes feel like a curse. But over the years, I have learned to channel this ability and use it to help others.

There are witches out there with chronic illnesses and mental illnesses, for whom moments of complete and total tranquility are few and far in between. Negative feelings and emotions aren't all "bad". All positive all the time is simply not realistic. There's always going to be a balance, a contrast, a yin and a yang. As we mature, we learn how to process and moderate our negativities. For me, with the help of medications and therapy, I'm able to keep my negative feelings and emotions from consuming me and taking over my life. As a witch, with time and experience, I've even learned how to use them to my advantage.

Yes, there are times when I do need to "clear" my mind. There are times, when self control is a necessity on my part. Divination is the main case here. But this is a skill that's taken many, many years for me to hone and master. Mental clarity is not always without effort and control. When impartiality is called for, I am able to compartmentalize and put everything in my mind on the back burner. For my readings and interpretations to be accurate, objectivity is a priority. And if that means momentarily "emptying" my mind out and letting myself be in the state of a shell, well, it works for me. It's how I know that divination is my niche.

Allowing myself to naturally feel and emote is what fuels my magic. The fire in me is what makes me the artist that I am, and the witch that I am. If I were totally chill without an ounce of madness in me, I doubt I'd be successful at being either.