#will probs delete

unfortunate for myself I am firmly someone who yearns to be taken care of, I have always been very giving and willing to do w/e for my partner and very much enjoy doing things yes but

goddamn

do I just want to not.

I want to b taken care of and taken out of my mind and so far gone and brought back to earth like just once lmao like!!!! is that too much to ask for.

learn the things I like and the ways 2 make me feel good and just doooooo it 😩

I know it's a lot of work but ufhhhhhhhh

I know it's ridiculous but like I'll invite a friend to the cinema or theatre and just feel guilty the whole time cause I feel like they don't actually want to be there but also like why would they be there if they didn't. like they could have just said no thanks and not spent their money. I know this and still feel guilty

and I only ever feel this way if I'm just hanging out with one friend. I guess if I'm with a group then it's like oh they want to hang out with everyone and I'm not just forcing them to hang out with me

like god I got the opportunity to get cheap tickets to a thing and I feel both guilty for getting people to come with me and guilty that I don't have enough to give to everyone who has asked for one