Funny Out Of Context Descending Quotes Part 3

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Funny Out Of Context Descending Quotes Part 3

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Photo of the Day: Will Lopez, formerly of Stacked Like Pancakes (“Pancakes and Chill”) — Ottobar — February 17th, 2018
Ginger, Felicity, and every other reasonable person on the team: Uhhhh whatcha doing?
Matt, Sam, and Quinn, spreading toothpaste on toast: Multitasking.
Out of context quotes from Taken that are pure gold 2/2:
(Admittedly this book has quite a few typos but here are some quotes that prove that Eva Nguyen is hilarious.)
HEY GUYS CHECK THIS OUT
THERE’S THIS BOOK CALLED TAKEN BY EVA NGUYEN ON AMAZON AND RIGHT NOW ITS ONLY A KINDLE BOOK AND IT’S PRETTY SHORT BUT ITS A PRETTY GOOD READ!!! YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY CHECK IT OUT CAUSE ITS LIKE $3 AND THERE SHOULD BE A PAPERBACK OUT SOON BUT BASICALLY IT’S A GOOD BOOK AND IT REALLY NEEDS A FANDOM!
Check what it’s got:
A strong female main character
Diversity
Fandom references
Some funny moments
Some serious moments
A meaningful friendship between a bunch of teenagers
A sci-fi plot
I’m not gonna spoil anything but also...
SHIPS
ANYWAY GUYS JUST CHECK THIS OUT CAUSE I THINK IT’S GOOD AND IT DESERVES AT LEAST A SMALL FAN BASE!!!

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Matt: Whomst’d’ve consumed my ice juice?!
Ashley: Should I call the exorcist?
Sam: I hath consumed thou ocean sauce.
Will: Call the exorcist.
Everyone: *standing around a broken coffee pot*
Macy: So. Who broke it? I’m not mad. I just want to know.
Zoe: I did... I broke it.
Macy: No. No you didn’t. Sam?
Sam: Don’t look at me. Look at Matt.
Matt: What? I didn’t break it!
Sam: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?
Matt: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!
Sam: Suspicious.
Matt: No, it’s not!
Ashley: If it matters, but probably not, Felicity was the last one to use it.
Felicity: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap.
Ashley: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Felicity: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows this, Ashley!
Zoe: Okay, let’s not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Macy.
Macy: No! Who broke it?
Matt: Macy... Quinn’s been awfully quiet.
Quinn: [shocked expression]
Everyone: [starts arguing]
Macy, aside where the others can’t hear her: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little too chummy around here.