Jul 26
Sometimes I do think I am physically getting worse but other times I think I am just more aware of what's going on and how things impact my body instead of floating inside a nebulous soup. However, I am not always sure it is better to be aware. With the nebulous soup there was less awareness that this is an inherent property of my body's function and I'm just going to have to get used to it and work around it. And like on a practical level it's good to know that but on an emotional level. It sucks. When I thought it was a personality flaw I had more hope of being able to overcome it.
#updates from the fainting couch#although I'm having a fairly wretched time with the pelvic pain the past few weeks and it has been#weirdly draining#really do need to go to the doctor about that. I am gearing up.#i am still sorting out the t situation. but after that#anyways but that's not exactly getting worse so much as a flare of something
