#waves garret

Waves could only watch Fat Fin stuff his craw for so long. After several minutes of the hedonistic display, the mantis shrimp zora turned to stare at the waves lapping the shoreline.

“Gotta hand it to ya, Hook Shot. Wasn’t sure about this chef you hired, but they really pulled through.”

The lady zorca beamed. Waves was a tough guy to please: while not at all cruel or spiteful, he was certainly old and a little grumpy. It took a lot to impress him, having seen so much in his lifetime, and Hook Shot relished those moments where she caught even him by surprise.

“Right? I’m a little jealous though,” she said. “I should have asked if he could’ve made extra for us. All of this is just for Fat Fin, and I’m not going to chance stealing from that.”

She gestured towards Fat Fin who was — as he’d described himself — hoovering his food. Empty plates clinked and cracked as he almost systematically made short work of each dish; Hook Shot was fairly certain he’d had not once stopped to take a breath.

“...Although I did ask if he could come up with a new recipe that’d specifically cater to a zorca’s appetite.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah! It’s a small sample for now - Saphirion wanted me to taste test it first.”

Hook Shot held out one hand so Waves could peer over her head to get a good look at what she was holding: a fat slice of cake, wrapped in parchment. While there was only one slice, he could see the layers it had, alternating between thick, glistening chocolate and what he had assumed was kelp. Even from this distance he got a strong whiff of mint and…something else. Lemon, perhaps? The mantis shrimp was not a fan of sweets, but its look and smell surprised him by how much it had his mouth watering.

“Have you tasted it yet?” he asked.

“No, I wanted Fat Fin to have the honor.”

“Scared it might taste awful?”

“Please!” Hook Shot scoffed, “And insult Saphirion? No, he just said this was so calorie-dense it would give a zorca energy for days. If that’s the case, why not let him have the first bite? Could help with his matches!”

“...That’s a good point.” Waves considered for a moment, then called out. 

“HEY! DORSAL BOY!”

For the first time since he began eating, Fat Fin stopped gorging. He jerked his head upward. 

“Dorsal boy?!”

Waves ignored the dazed response.

“Come over here for a second.”

Fat Fin glanced over at the dishes he’d yet to tackle. With a groan, he reluctantly stepped away to properly meet with Hook Shot and Waves.

“What is it?” he asked.

“This,” Hook Shot responded, holding up the cake piece. “Saphirion made this especially for us Zorca, and I wanted you to try it! Tell me how it tastes, so I can see if anything about it needs to be changed.”

“A…dessert?” Fat Fin looked slightly puzzled.

“I wanted something akin to an energy bar. The idea behind it is so we don’t have to go hungry when we struggle with finding food - or resort to eating monsters, especially for the women. I want you to try it, so we can see if you notice anything.”

“Hmm. Anything I’m supposed to notice?”

“You know…feeling energized, satisfied in your appetite, that sort of thing.” She gestured at the rest of the feast left untouched. “If you eat this cake, then you won’t feel the need to eat the rest of that.”

Fat Fin groaned.

“But I waaaaaant to.”

“JUST INDULGE ME ON THIS, FIN!”

He huffed. “Fiiiiine. Give it here.”

“Open your mouth.”

Fat Fin paused, uncertain, then caught the glint in Hook Shot’s eyes. He rolled his eyes, grinning himself, then humored her and obliged, bending to present his gaping maw. 

Hook Shot neatly placed the piece of cake on his tongue, then pushed his lower jaw closed and gave it a loving pat. 

Waves glanced between the two, then threw his own hands up in the air.

“Hylia, why are you Zorca like this?”

“Because it’s fun,” said Hook Shot. 

He didn’t have a retort. He didn’t really care, either, since he was just as curious to hear Fat Fin’s verdict. The two watched as he stood back to his full height and chewed thoughtfully. 

The cake was no more than a crumb to Fat Fin, but he made sure to spread it across his tongue as much as possible so he could really study the flavor profile. The mint and lemon were…strong, but not overpowering, and he was surprised by how well the kelp went with chocolate.

When he felt he’d dragged things out long enough, Fat Fin swallowed it down and ran his tongue along his teeth before smacking his lips.

“Well? What did you think?” asked Hook Shot and Waves in unison.

“Hm! It was delicious. Saphirion really knows his stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuff…”

The large zorca slurred that last word so suddenly that the other two were taken by surprise. Hook Shot looked him over, and watched his eyes as they dilated almost all the way to the sclera.

“Oh Hylia–Fat Fin! Are you alright?”

“I’mmm just fiiiiiiiiiine.” His grin spread slow and wide; any wider, and his face could have split in half. “In fact I feel GREAT!”

Before either Hook Shot or Waves could ask any more questions, Hook Shot screamed as Fat Fin rushed forward, lifted her off her feet, and spun her in a wild pirouette, bellowing laughter all the while. She clung to him, more startled by this new behavior than anything, and her mind swam as the spin became more and more erratic. By the time he set her down, she was dazed and disoriented, stumbling a bit as she tried to regain her bearings. 

Waves, clinging to her head throughout this seeming bout of mania from Fat Fin, was little better.

“Fin!” he yelled. “What in the SEVEN SEAS has gotten into you?!”

“Nothing, boss!” clamored Fat Fin. “I just feel STRONG!! I feel INVINCIBLE! IRRESISTIBLE! UNBEATABLE! UNTOUCHABLE!”

“...Was it the cake?” ventured Hook Shot.

Waves certainly had no answer, and if she was directing that question to Fat Fin, he certainly wasn’t listening. He was busy doing stretches, then a series of squats, then lunges sliding into a front split (Hook Shot always was impressed with his flexibility). He adjusted again, this time doing a series of pushups, and before long he was leaping back up to his feet.

“Issssss it just me or is it hot out?” he breathed. “I need to get to water!”

Hook Shot and Waves were speechless, but only for as long as it took for Hook Shot to realize he was marching to the shore. Shaking out of her shock, she rushed after him.

“Fat Fin, wait!” she called out. “I don’t think leaving the island is a good idea. Let’s talk about this. Tell me what’s happening!”

“Later! I need to cool off.” 

Fat Fin moaned as soon as he set foot in the water. Hook Shot felt embarrassed at how much the sound made her blush.

“Fin NO!” Waves shouted, using his authority in an attempt to reel the zorca in. “We still have work to do!”

Fat Fin stopped when the water was up to his waist. He turned, that rictus grin still on his face.

“Bossss relaaaaaax,” he slurred. “I’m doing exactly what you want me to do!”

“What?!”

“I’m going to do five hundred laps around the island! And then I’m going to swim up and down the coastlines of Hyrule! Five hundred more times!”

“You can’t do that!” That was not in any way a doubt against his abilities, it was an order from Waves to stay put. Fat Fin, however, saw it as the former.

“WATCH ME!!”

The Zorca dove forward and split the water until his dorsal was the only thing visible and cutting through the waves like a knife. In seconds he was gone, leaving Waves Garret and Hook Shot utterly flabbergasted.

“He’s gonna do it,” Hook Shot said quietly.

“I know.” Waves replied. “But what I'm worried about is how long it's going to take him. If he’s not back in time for his matches we’ll have to forfeit.”

“Oh.”

“That cake really packed a punch.”

“Yup.”

“So what do we do now?”

“What can we do?”

“Stall, maybe.”

“That might be a tall order, Boss. Even Chell might not be open to that idea.”

“Hm, maybe. Let’s think about our options, then.”

“Want to go get some autographs from the other fighters in the meantime?”

There was a long pause.