#unwated

I have been pushed aside, yelled at, ignored, made the feel wrong for who I am and how I feel.

Why is this stilll the person I love?

-stupidity

-lack of self worth

-more afraid to be alone than miserable

I don't know what I expected tbh. It was never like I actually felt belong before. No, everywhere I go, I always feel as if I'm the third wheel, the guy whom everyone just merely tolerates with, not someone whose presence is anticipated and celebrated. Even the friends who I feel like they can understand me the most, they still don't make me feel belong. And that's honestly the worst.

It's like floating away and never really leaving an impact on anyone's life. It's exactly the kind of feeling that made me feel unwanted then. Yet people question my lack of excitement to go out and meet people. Like hello, all the times I have spent actually trying to socialise I was instead being greeted by cold shoulders and you expect me to put myself into that kind of situation again?