There are a lot of “do gooders” in the world. There are also a lot of people who think they are doing good, but really are just making it worse. To those of you who are “making it worse,” just stop.
This is how you know that you’re not helping, the person is not doing better. Said person begins to avoid you, or exhibits more in desirable behaviors.... times ten.
I have a friend, she really does exist. He boyfriend felt compelled to tell me how he wanted her “to do better.” The only time he felt this gracious was when he was “lit.”
So when he is telling me this, all I can do is take his word for it. The reality was, he was constantly talking down to her, call her names, as well as comparing her to her two best friends who were shaped a little different.
You have to already know that that caused tension amongst friends, but also cause her to become depressed and with a horrible self image. Instead of being motivated , she seemed to have lost energy and slept a lot.
To this day, he is still trying to “motivate” her in the exact same way. She has two great friends who help reverser his effects. Now she “Motivates” him right back.
📚LESSON: Leave people alone. Do not offer up advice that was not requested. If someone needs help and really want it, they will seek it. Otherwise you could be hurting the person you want to help.
