#two-bit headcanons

heya birdie! thanks sm for requesting (: you didn't specify if this was sfw or nsfw so i just assumed it was sfw, like you're sleeping beside him lol. thank you, im glad you enjoy my writing! i got inspired to write these kinda spur of the moment thing so sorry if they're not really well written, it's bc i didn't really edit them lmaoo - mae

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Sleeping with Two-bit Hc's (sfw):

° Let's just start off with the fact that Two-bit Matthews is the biggest cuddler out of the whole entire gang and you cannot change my mind!

° Honestly, you're wrapped up in his arms the second you both get into bed. 

° Sporadic tickle fights will occur when you both get into bed, and he won't stop until you declare something lame like how he's the best in the entire world. What a loser lmaoo

° He's pretty talkative, so giggle fests are incredibly commonplace when you're both sleepy. 

° Did I also mention that Two's an honest to god human radiator? Like I hope you didn't want any covers because he's warm as hell. 

° Speaking of covers, he's a blanket snatcher and hogger, it's why you end up sleeping on his back now. 

° Buries his big head into the crook of your neck or chest because Two is soft y'all! Try to change my mind!

° His even breathing is like music to your ears, and he looks so comfy and peaceful when he sleeps. Lmaoo you don't actually watch him sleep, you just glance for like a second.

° Spooning is the only valid thing here, and yes, you do attempt to big spoon him and it's wholesome asf. It makes him laugh. 

° He holds onto you like a koala bear and you don't mind because it's comfy as hell. 

° Oh yeah, if things aren't comfy, expect for Two-bit to like move around a bunch until he's gotten comfy. 

° And sometimes he just a big dickhead and moves when things are comfy to get a reaction out of you and istg this one time you got up and were gonna leave. 

° "Babe no! Come back!" He choked out between laughs, hauling your ass back into bed with him. 

° "You're such an ass, Two! I was comfyyyyyy" honestly you sounded like your world was ending (which it was) …

° Lmaoo he probably Dutch ovens you dhshdgwbahshe

° His sleepy voice though!!! Like who gave this man the right to sound like that??? 

° Kisses your forehead and temple a lot. 

° I swear he can't sleep without having some sort of contact with you. 

° Sometimes you wake up and he's grabbed your hand or your ass… It's mainly your ass but we don't talk about that.

° He mumbles in his sleep. 

° He also snores like all hell. Like pls shove a pencil up his nose for christ sake!

° Two-bit star fishes like its a profession. 

° He takes up all of the room, but he says it's just so he can wake up to you on top of him, ayeeee! 

° Honestly, don't expect to get up in the mornings because Two-bit's gonna be snuggling with you for a solid two hours before he even thinks of getting up.

° If you can't sleep, he'll play with your hair for a little while before he messes it up. 

° Honestly, he loves messing with you when you sleep. You're no stranger to the shaving cream in your hand, tickled by a feather on your face prank and unfortunately you fall for it every single goddamn time! 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

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~Gives you his ring to wear and often kisses the finger you put it on

~Gets you skincare products as gifts on christmas/your birthday (and will use them with you if you promise not to tell anyone) (Because “skincare ain’t tuff… but I guess acne ain’t either”)

~Always gives you his jacket when you get cold, even though 9/10 times all he’s wearing under it is a Mickey tank top

~Threw rocks at your window once and only once, because he broke it

~Takes you to breakfast whenever he has extra money

~Rests his hand on the inside of your thigh while driving

~Smiles at you when you talk because he’s actually interested in what you have to say

~Whenever he’s out with the gang instead of you, basically all he says is “Y/N would like this! or “Yeah, you know, Y/N and I…”

~Insists, for some reason, that he ties your shoe when it comes untied

~Sneaks the two of you into the roller rink when you’re feeling down

~Put his landline in his room so he could pick up your call on the first ring (it lasted about six months until his mom found out and had him put it back in the kitchen)

~Lets you see and run your hands through his ungreased hair

~Asks you to call him or wave once you get into your house so he knows you’re safe, especially if it’s dark out

Ooh yes absolutely!!!

-two-bit likes to think he was always a ladies’ man and a mans’ man bc my son is pansexual but honestly?? he used to be super awkward?

-if this were modern times, twelve year old two-bit would literally be that kid who asks for girls to send nudes by texting “show me ur bewbz lol” or something cringe like that

-as he got older he got less awkward with the girlies

-but when he’s drunk he can be a bit of a douche

-remember when he pulled that girl’s skirt up? yup. that’s what i mean

-but regular ol’ sober two-bit would be such a charmer

-he usually always starts the conversation but can tell when a girl isn’t interested and will back off immediately

-but if he ever can’t tell, he has his own little test! he always introduces himself as ‘two-bit,’ never ‘keith’ (obviously). if a girl replies “why do they call you that?” she’s interested. if she says “that’s silly” or “that ain’t your real name!” she isn’t

-he’s not too big on pick up lines (he’ll use a sexual one jokingly when he’s drunk but that’s about it)

-he feels compliments are the best way to a girl’s heart and honestly??? it works pretty well

-his favorite thing about a girl is her hair! he’ll always compliment her hair

-and girls love it they’re just like “oh thank you️️️️️️️️️ <3 <3 <3”

-definitely the type to brag to try to impress a girl

-probably says “you dig okay baby” to a lot of them

-it’s a total lady killer let’s be honest here

Ponyboy: jell-o

Sodapop: cherry pie

Darry: ham sandwich

Steve: pretzels

Two-Bit: original potato chips

Johnny: mac n’ cheese

Two-Bit teaches his little sister how to drive...

“Do you really need that Two-Bit?” You asked with a roll of your eyes. Your big brother was in the passenger seat with a helmet on his head, his arms folded on his chest. 

“Yes.” He muttered. “I’m not dying today, and if I do, just know that I will haunt you till the day you die.” 

“Stop being so dramatic.” You put the key into the ignition and you started the car. You put the hand break down like your mother had showed you and you put the car into drive, only for it to jolt forward.

“OH MY GOD, KAREN! BREAK. BREAK! FOR GOD’S SAKE.” He cried, clinging onto his seat belt for dear life. 

“Crap, sorry-”

“Sorry? You’re sorry? You always, always, always put your foot on the break when you’re starting a car! Always Karen! You’ll kill yourself, or worse ME. I’m just an innocent passenger. KAREN! Why do you want to kill me for?” Your eyes widened at your brother, you couldn’t believe how dramatic he was being. 

“Shut up, Keith, I said I was sorry. Stop being a baby. I’ll tell mum.” 

“I’ll tell her that you tried to kill me! Now take your foot off the break and gently, GENTLY Karen, do you know what that is? GENTLY put your foot on the accelerator.” 

You placed your foot on the accelerator and the car moved forward at a slow pace. 

“OH MY GOD KAREN.” 

“What, what, what!” Your eyes widened as you looked at your big brother. 

“EYES ON THE ROAD KAREN! You’re going way too fast! Foot off the pedal, let it roll forward.”

“Keith, I’m doing 25k in an 80 zone!” You growled, this was so much easier when your mother was teaching you.

“Yeah well slow down you lunatic!” 

“Screw you Keith!” You muttered as you slammed on the break. You put the car into park as you undid your seat belt, you had, had more than enough for one day. “I’m not going anywhere with you ever again!” 

“Real mature Karen!” He shook his head at you as slammed the door shut. “You’re a quitter!” 

i’m so into two atm i know i say that all the time but it’s the truth

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~Your moms used to be friends until Two-Bit’s had to start working basically 24 hours

~Your parents would have Two-Bit walk you places, just to be safe

~You were always at Two’s house, teaching him how to comb his hair or doing his homework for him so he could go on a date

~On the flip side, Two would always tell you which outfits looked the best on you (but as your guy friend, nothing more…)

~Being super touchy-feely with each other because you used to take baths together you’re just close

~Like, if you’re in Two’s way, he’d place his hands on your waist and shift you over

~And if Two was feeling down, you would let him rest his head on your shoulder

~You being the only one to call Two-Bit Keith because you knew him before he got his nickname

~Girls Keith dated citing you as a reason for breaking up with them, because he would go to you with any problem or emotion he was feeling before he went to them

~You would have to hold your tongue at school when people called him stupid, when you remember that time he climbed up a tree and twisted a wire around a screen so your walkie talkie could reach his house, or how he was the first person to memorize his multiplication tables, or how he was reading books to his sister long before anyone else could

~You often spend the night at his house just because, you sleep with Keith in his bed and wake up early to clean the kitchen for his mom (you and Keith always wake up cuddling, but never acknowledge it)

~Dealing with people exclaiming “why aren’t you guys dating?!” or telling you in a condescending way, “you’re not much his type anyway”

~The two of you knowing you each had a little thing for each other, but never acting on it because you loved each other so much and didn’t want to lose each other as friends

~However, one night, you both go to his house a little drunk and giddy

~After you get in bed it just happens, finally, and Keith’s lips fall on yours

~You don’t kiss for long, you both fall asleep in each other’s arms soon after

~After that, you’re together even more (which no one thought was possible)

~Dating Keith ends up being the best thing ever because you’re so comfortable around him