#tw gnf

Memories ❤️💙🤍🖤

on gnf and sa

// SA, mentions of rape

as a survivor of sa and rape i have a lot of things to say about the gnf situation and especially how the internet handled it

first: yes, george should or could have done better.

however my biggest issue is people calling gnf a rapist or calling it sa, those people obviously do not understand WHAT about it is that makes sa and rape so traumatizing.

discomfort or physical pain is not what makes it so bad. its someone else taking pleasure in hurting you like that, its dehumanizing and humiliating and other things i dont even know the words for.

someone knowingly and willingly regarding your consent and violating you like that can damage you in a way that someone accidentally making you uncomfortable during mutual flirting NEVER could.

the intent and disregard for the victim as a person is what makes SA so terrible on so many levels.

someone not noticing a signal or accidentally crossing a boundary is a mistake. and trying to put that to the same level as SA is disrespectful to every victim, its belittling and downplaying just how horrible an experience like that is.

(not that uncomfortable situations cant be traumatizing or make you feel trapped and are horrible, thats no question and its valid)

but miscommunications and mistakes happen in human interactions and no honest mistake or misunterpretation can be put on the same level as SA and rape.

caiti herself said not to call it that and as a survivor i felt ridiculed and angered by people putting my experience on the same shelf as someone making a mistake.

people cant see nuance in situations anymore and its making me sad and frustrated.

i saw someone say that "people pick up their progressive ideology but forget to unlearn the concepts of their previous beliefs" which turns progressiveness into puritanism 2.0 and this leads to stuff like this, people labeling something as sa or rape, knowing it is inexcusable and genuinely one of the worst things you can do to another person, but refuse to acknowledge nuance and different situations that arent black and white because they dont actually UNDERSTAND their own beliefs, they just want to be the morally right and pure ones because thats what you do t get cancelled for on twitter by people that are in the same progressiveness/purity trap. which hurts victims more than it helps.

they wanna be right and morally above all but dont care to actually get into uncomfortable subjects