Tuttle Digs Through M*A*S*H Scripts- 'Yankee Doodle Doctor'
Let's look briefly at the Saints in Surgical Garb mockumentary the M*A*S*H 4077th made-- specifically, let's look at a draft script vs the final work.
The video of the final version is at the end, with captions and audio. Feel free to scroll down and watch that first before looking at the script.
The copy we're looking at today is from 22 August, 1972. It was directed by Lee Phillips, and written by Laurence Marks. Very curiously to me marked FINAL (as in Final Draft) -- but as the filmed version had such significant changes, it's unlikely that this was the shooting draft. This was Loretta Swit's copy. Any annotations in the script are in her handwriting. These annotations make me wonder whether this was Loretta's copy used during the table read and they were making changes on the fly as they went.
P.30- The first page we're looking at as very little changes to it from the final shooting draft. In fact, the majority of the scenes where we see Clayton and the rest of the camp watching the film are the same, as is Frank's voice over within the film.
P.31 is essentially the same, but the main differences--
'Hawkeye and group' translates on screen to Hawkeye, Radar and Trapper
they hold the banner at chest level, not waist level (probably to hide the fact that Radar is NOT in uniform as Hawk and Trap are
the nurses are followed into the scene
when Hawk, Trap and Radar drop the banner, they do not scramble to pick it up but pose happily and twirl
the nurses roll their eyes and walk off
Hawkeye, the nurse from the scene and Trapper compliment Radar--Cutler squeezes his cheek, Trapper calls out to him, Hawkeye makes an O-K gesture at Radar and tells him he's beautiful
finally, there is an extra shot of Trapper, Hawk and Radar twirling in their underwear (Hawk and Trap still in dress uniform from waist up).
P.32- This has SIGNIFICANT changes--
in the script, there is no mention whatsoever of Hawkeye cosplaying as Groucho Marx (with impression and costume) and Trapper as Harpo (along with a horn, trench coat— or possibly dressing gown? Difficult to tell). stethoscope and hat, cross-eyed every time he's on screen.
There is no mention in the script of Hawkeye complimenting Radar with, 'Radar, you're terrific!' or Radar hushing him as Hawk and Trap continue to giggle together over the reactions of Clayton, Frank, Margaret and Henry as they watch.
Trapper's dialogue is completely deleted in the filmed version, replaced by honking horn
Radar and Hawkeye's dialogue does change a bit, with more dialogue added.
Loretta's handwritten annotation: 'Sorry son, but you should've called ahead.' This was added as ‘you should have BOOKED ahead, as was 'you should have booked the rest of you, too.'
p.33- changes to the final script include:
Radar's mugging the camera with a hand to his face in an 'oh-no' half-Macaulay Culkin expression is not in the script.
Frank's dialogue is shortened
there is no actual dog barking
When Cutler comes in to tell Radar 'head's up everybody,' Radar sits up, eyes still closed, so she can pinch his cheek again and tell him he's lucky; he smiles, then glares at her for pinching his cheek
Loretta's annotations of crossing out, in pencil, 'The'
p.34 - again, significant changes. In the Final Cut,
Hawk and Trap are still in Marx Bros mode as they tromp in.
Most of the dialogue is changed.
Trap's dialogue is deleted and replaced with occasional horn honking.
The Groucho/Harpo 'Scalpel' routine was added in the final cut, as was a giant saw, hammer.
Cutler is given an additional line.
Radar makes body movements as GroucHawk 'saws' him open.
p.35- additional changes to the final version:
More attempts at flirting from GroucHawk to Cutler
More dialogue for Cutler
more general Marx Bros dialogue
Frank's dialogue is shortened
Hawk and Trap (now un-Marxed) enter and throw off their army coats to join the party
There's an extra 'Gentlemen!' called out by Hawkeye
Hawkeye goes on top of the table with Cutler to talk to the crowd from above, and does not stay on the floor level
There's an extra shot of Clayton and Henry's reactions-- Henry is excited and entertained, and then stops himself when he remembers Clayton is right next to him,
the 'Bleurgh!' and gags as they all drink from the shoes was not in the script
p. 36 changes to the final draft include:
Hawkeye sits, already looking at the camera over a patient.
His dialogue Is only marginally changed-- mainly to include 'guns and bombs and anti-personnel land-mines' instead of just 'guns'
Additional footage of the camp watching the film startled into a weighty silence
I cut the video a few seconds too soon (sorry not an editor), but the audience does applaud and exit as Henry, Clayton, Margaret and Frank all rise and start to talk over each other about how inappropriate the film was. So the main focus on this was just the short film, so stopping here.
Clip from the episode showing the mockumentary- sound and subtitles (never a laugh track)
I have to wonder where the Marx Bros aspect came from. As Alan grew up literally in the vaudeville circuits watching his parents perform, I'd happily bet a few earthmonies that during the table read, either he read them à la Groucho, or he said, flat out, this needs to be a Groucho Marx sketch.
Either way, I do wish I could have been in that writer's room to know how they found this final piece for the Marx Bros imitations.
In my book, this is what sells the irascible and biting political satire that they were going for-- the Marx Bros were heavily politicised, and evoking their images in this mockumentary was an absolute stroke of genius.
Just using the images alone of the Marx Bros evokes and in some ways steals some of the biting political satire-- especially against war- that the Marx bros were known for.
It instantly elevates the scene to be not only more energetic and playful, but also more irate, more vicious, more passionate and more aggressive than the non-Marxed version in the draft.
Although the costumes are not the same, (and no singing) Hawkeye is definitely giving a mix of 'Whatever It Is, I'm Against It' from Horse Feathers and 'The Laws of My Administration' from the political farce, Duck Soup (1933). (if you haven't seen Duck Soup, I highly recommend it, as it's about an utterly incompetent president of the fictional country of Freedonia who eventually drags his country into a war. It's an angry, biting commentary on war, on corrupt and incompetent, bumbling leaders who don't care about the people they're using in war like tissue paper at all. It’s not the best Marx film, but it is one of my very favourites. Horse Feathers is also delightful).
(Duck Soup also has the famous Groucho mirror scene-- you can see not only the Groucho version here but a few other fun versions, as well. )
Back to M*A*S*H and Yankee Doodle Doctor, This one change-- the Marx Bros imagery used-- at least in my book, made the entire thing take on an extra dimension. These visual cartwheels, the more physical vaudevillian performances, and Groucho-esque verbal pyrotechnics are what help solidify the landing for Hawk's final, bitter commentary at the end.
All in all, I do believe the final cut of the episode was far superior. I don't know how they decided on these specific changes for the final piece, but I'm so grateful they figured it out.
Reading the draft script, this is all still very funny and poignant, it works very well. But the finished product has that final punch that this mockumentary and final scene to the episode needed.
In many ways, if I had to sum up 'what is M*A*S*H' in just one segment, I would show someone this scene. Because it has the humour, it has the political satire, it has the angry commentary, it has the silliness and self-referential awareness, the 'fuck you' to the faces of the bumbling authorities sat right there, and it has the heart that M*A*S*H became known for.
If you have an interest in The Marx Brothers and how they used humour as political and social commentary, I highly recommend reading the works of Martin Gardener. He also did a lecture here that is very much worth watching.
tuttle digs through M*A*S*H scripts 13/??
tuttle digs through M*A*S*H scripts
