#turning20

We are already in August, damn, time flies. I’m currently counting down my last days of being a teen, because on August 22nd, I turn 20! 

Oh the teens, the most annoying, arrogant and narcissistic years of my life. I swore I knew who I was and who I wanted to be, everyone (especially my parents) were wrong and no one understood me. Sounds like the typical teenage soap opera, right? Oh, I was a handful. 

I’ve made my share of stupid mistakes and honestly, I don’t regret them. I know that sounds so cliché but I am so happy to be where I am today, mentally and emotionally. I have learnt so much over the years and I’ve grown so much closer to my parents. 

I was blessed with beautiful, amazing and understanding parents. My mom and dad are some of the most loving people on this earth and I couldn’t ask for anyone else. Yeah they can be strict, but they listen and they talk to me and they help me see the world in a completely different way. They taught me that no one owes me anything, and every mistake I make is on me. That excuses don’t matter in the real world, and I must take responsibility for myself and my own actions, it’s the only way I could survive in this world.

The past 7 years have been quite eventful, from going to an uptight prep school and making a few friends, to finding my niche in a diverse high school that almost felt like home. Throughout high school I made some bad decisions - but the learning experiences and the bonding experiences that came after them, were well worth it. High school was where I found who I was, I made friendships that will last a lifetime (I hope), I learnt tools that I can keep in my back pocket, and my mind was opened to so many different cultures and I loved every moment of it. 

AH SO FRICKIN CUTE I LOVE PUSHEEN 😭💓💓 I LOVE YOU JUNIPERHASFALLEN THANK YOU FOR THIS CUTE ASS ADORABLE HEARTWARMING WISH AND FOR ALWAYS FEEDING AND SUPPORTING MY DELUSIONS 🔥‼️ please don’t apologise WHAT i could be getting this next month and would STILL BE OVER THE MOON

having grown up was hard to accept like the sun, wonderful but blinding so she looked down, then behind her back she admired her shadows, so comforting protecting a little girl from burning

to take a step ahead, she stared at her feet innocent gravity was next to play it tucking her hair that was in the way and saw the backs of all her mates with silhouettes obscure and edges refined

catching up, she ran with noisy sliders heads were turned and they all gushed they saw her, but childish and small “is this a game?” so they followed and ran graceful forms and steady paces and as their figures were shrinking her eyes saw but her heart squeezed shut

20 hari menuju 20

Hal yang bisa jadi aku baru sadari adalah,mungkin sebenarnya manusia bukan membenci masalah tapi takut tak menemukan solusi.

yang ada dalam pikiran kita perpaduan antara ekspektasi diri juga orang lain dan ketakutan akan hal yang akan datang.

dalam kalutnya pikiran itu kita dituntut segera menemukan solusi yang sebenarnya kita saja masih berusaha menemukan cara agar kabut di pikiran ini reda.

tidak papa, tarik nafas...

jadi begini,

mungkin buku yang kubaca tidak sebanyak lembar yang sudah kau tandai,perjalanan yang ku lalui belum sejauh ujung jalan yang terlihat dipelupuk matamu ,orang yang ku temui juga tidak seberagam tangan yang sudah kau jabat dan maaf jika pengetahuan pendek ku ini begitu menggurui. tapi, bukankah tanpa semua itu aku masih bisa menyadari betapa ramainya isi kepalamu ?

kita sudah disini, jadi,tetaplah berpacu di jalan yang kau pijak sekarang dan selesaikan sampai ujung ya?

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i think that’s enough,semoga selalu ada yang bisa diambil dari apapun yang terjadi.

feel free to interact

Stay safe ,Stay healthy ya’ll 

with love  ❤️