#trueclarebelle

Eli shrugged out of his pajama pants and back into his jeans from earlier in the day, each of his movements hasty to avoid wasting time. For anyone else, Eli wouldn't have been rushing to get out the door, but Clare had become an exception to a multitude of his normal rules; even the ones he never could have seen himself breaking just a month prior. At this point, Clare's well-being and happiness had become a topic of utmost importance to him. He'd known of her issues going on at home, her parents perpetually engaged in a battle of wills regarding their marriage. For Eli, someone who had never experienced such intense fighting on his parent's parts, it was difficult to understand perfectly, but that didn't stop him from empathizing deeply with the girl. If there was any way to lessen the load and ease the burden of living in such a hectic household, then Eli was ready to bend over backwards to make it happen. This level of dedication to another person hadn't even been achievable since her-- but then he thought better of musing over that tidbit, forcing himself to stray away from those connections. At the moment, Clare needed him, and it was the only thing he was willing to make his priority. After shoving his feet into his sneakers and snatching a jacket off the back of his door, Eli made his way downstairs, not even bothering to give his parents a heads up about his whereabouts. They knew all too well his penchant for night driving, and as far as Clare was concerned, there wasn't a moment to be spared. After settling into the driver's seat of Morty, he pulled out of the driveway and began the newly familiar trip to the Edwards home, arriving there in almost no time at all. Ambling along the curb, he idled the car and sent Clare a text, letting her know he'd just gotten there. Once he spotted the girl stepping out of her house, Eli reached across the seat to open the door for her, pushing it with a light shove. “At the risk of sounding smug, I'm so very proud of myself for getting you to this extreme of rule-breaking. Sneaking out to go driving all night? I'm impressed, Clarabelle.” he commented with a playful smile, quickly toning it down as he wondered if she was in the mood to joke. Online, her initial demeanor had seemed upset and aggravated, something he didn't want to worsen with what should have been his helpful company. Once she was sea tbelted in, Eli started off down the road, driving nowhere in particular to begin with. “I know I asked how you were doing online, but I feel inclined to ask again now that we're in person.” he said softly, glancing over to her in the hopes that she'd feel up to talking with him about her day.

Clare rested against her headboard, her eyes closing as she slipped on the noise cancellation headphones Eli had given her. She’d never been more grateful for the contraption as it allowed her a small get away from her bickering parents bickering down the hall. The whole irony was that their spat began in the living room, leaving Clare to escape to the confines of her room. She was far too tired to try intervening, deciding to just let them go at it while she departed. But it didn’t take long for them to want a change of scenery and bringing their fight to the top floor of the house. Clare was running out of options as her parents seemed keen on driving her crazy. There was no such thing as a safe, neutral place in her house but she took comfort in knowing that soon enough, she would be away from the pair of them. Reaching out to Eli hadn’t been Clare’s plan at all but seeing him online sparked the idea faster than she had time to stop herself. Before she knew it, she was instant messaging him to see what he was up to at that present moment. It was late and Clare wouldn’t have faulted him for not being able to see her now, never mind to take her away from her feuding parents. As always, however, Eli had proven himself to be one of the most dependable people in her life. She was appreciative of the fact that he was willing to drop everything at a moment’s notice just to come to her rescue. He was a good friend and gestures such as this made her like him even more. While Clare still didn’t have the guts to be candid about the crush she harbored for him, she willingly accepted any and all opportunities to be in his company. Fleeing her house in the middle of the night wasn’t an ideal scenario to hang out but given the circumstance, Clare simply wanted out. She wasn’t sure how many more nights she could endure this, her parents sniping at each other or having full blown arguments. It was as if they had given up even trying to keep it together for her sake. Their animosity was taking on new life and it scared Clare each time to wonder what the future for their family had in store. The word ‘divorce’ swirled relentlessly in her mind but that wasn’t a fate she wanted for her parents. Despite how good some time off would do for them, the finality of that move would destroy everything she’d come to know since she was a child. It wasn’t until Clare opened her eyes that she realized she’d been crying. Wiping stubbornly at her eyes, she checked her phone and saw the text from Eli. Sighing in relief, she took off the headphones and got out of bed, stuffing her feet in her flats. She didn’t care to tell her parents that she was leaving, doubting that they’d even notice with the way they were going at it. Grabbing her jacket and putting it on, Clare left the house and made her way to where Eli waited on the curb. She smiled weakly at his greeting, knowing that he was trying to take her mind off things but found that she was too upset to humor him just then. Getting buckled up, she settled against the seat, exhaling once Eli began to drive. “I’m sorry I’m not much fun to be around now,” she said, turning her attention from the window to him. “I’m drained but I’m feeling a bit better now, knowing that I’m away from them and with you,” she said honestly, offering a small smile. “You really didn’t have to do this for me but it means a lot that you did, Goldy.”

Eli had spent the majority of the day attempting to dodge the pact he and Clare had made the week before, unprepared to come clean to her about who he was truly falling for. The fact that she wound up having a bad night served as some sort of indirect sign that perhaps it wasn't the right time to tell her about it; her emotions too fragile and her mindset too shaken to focus on something as trivial as a crush. For all he knew, she'd already spoken to whoever currently held her affections, and she just hadn't had the chance to mention it yet. Shooing those thoughts away, Eli kept his eyes on the road, taking a few turns as they sped along. “Don't be sorry for anything.” he replied quietly, realizing that he had been out of line in trying to crack a joke the moment she entered the car. Seeing Clare upset or downtrodden hit Eli personally, so used to the girl's pleasant and calm disposition. Her pain became partly his as well, a tendency he was noticing more with each day he spent in Clare's company. The way she phrased her next sentiment brought a smile to his face, though he did his best to subdue it the moment he felt his lips curling upwards. Clare had a knack for clawing reactions out of him far faster than he could move to censor them. “I hate the idea of you having to listen to them having it out. Anytime they're doing that, just call me and I'll get you. I don't care what time it is, it'd never be a bother.” he assured, glancing over at her briefly before returning his full attention to the road. “So it was over your grades, of all things? It couldn't have been for anything bad about them. You're a goddamn genius as far as I'm concerned.” he said, heading down a path that he wasn't particularly familiar with for the sake of adventure. “I'm sure that the longer they keep fighting for, the less likely they are to try couple's counseling, even if it could do them a world of good.” he mused quietly, shaking his head in disdain for how her parents were acting.

Clare had a hard time getting out of the moods that came about because of her parents. It was ridiculous to her just how much they could influence her but Clare wanted to put an end to that as quickly as possible. The last thing she wanted to do was make Eli feel as if she was ungrateful for what he was doing for her. To the contrary, being with him was the only thing that stood a chance of getting her out of this funk. Had she been meeting him for any other reason, she would have laughed at his greeting and come up with a quick retort but her energy level felt too low. Nonetheless, Clare wanted this night to turn around. This would be her clean slate to break free of her house and all the problems that were there and do something for herself. The best antidote for her troubled mind was the raven haired boy beside her—even if Eli was also the one person who unraveled her the most. Now that the week was at an end, Clare knew she had so far failed on her side of the pact they made. Eli hadn’t told her how his confession went which led Clare to think of one of two things happened. Either he was just like her and didn’t follow through quite yet or he did and his outcome wasn’t as he hoped it would be. In the former, there was still a shred of hope that perhaps she was the girl he’d been talking about all along. Clare liked to believe that she was but knew better than to set her hopes too high, for fear of disappointment. If it was the latter, Clare would have liked to know the girl who was crazy enough to turn him down. With her disastrous night, the pact and her promise had escaped her memory. But being with Eli now kicked it to the forefront of her thoughts. The night felt like a complete wash out and Clare was uncertain of how to actually go forth with telling him, if ever at all. At his reply, Clare looked down bashfully, still feeling awful about her mood but glad that he wasn’t upset with her for it. He was too good to be true in her eyes, a welcome presence for the night. “Your headphones actually came in handy,” she noted, “but I do like the idea of more hang outs in exchange.” She kept her eyes on him even as he looked back at the road, taking in his profile. For a moment she got so lost in thought that she almost didn’t hear him until she snapped out of it. “My grades were terrific, that wasn’t the problem. It was the fact that my dad didn’t show up like he said he would for the conference. My mom was waiting for him and…yeah, she was none too pleased about his disappearing act,” she said. She shook her head as well, both embarrassed and disgusted by her parents’ behavior. “That possibility is officially off the table, I’m sure of it." Clare mumbled, fiddling with a button on her jacket.

Eli quirked a brow at her comment about his headphones, happy to hear that they'd been coming in handy. It was a small fix, and certainly a feeble one for how intense the fights in her home seemed to be, but he was more than happy to offer her even a little peace of mind. As she followed up, Eli nodded with a smile, definitely in agreement that seeing each other was a win/win. Even if he wouldn't be able to muster up his confession during their time together, or if he found it simply wasn't the right time, nothing topped being around Clare. At school, being in her presence was great, but the two managed to connect on an even deeper level when it was just them. “I think you're the adult in that household, if I'm being blunt here.” he murmured, his heart sinking even more for Clare as she elaborated on how badly her conference had gone. “The least he could have done was put aside whatever problems he has with your mom for your sake. He can't take those things out on you, the same goes for your mom.” he continued, sighing after her reply. “You deserve better, Clare. I know that doesn't change anything at home, but I doubt you get told that often enough.” Noticing how she fell silent, Eli opted to stay quiet himself for a few moments, until he could hear the sound of gravel crunching beneath his tires. His focus had been almost entirely fixed on Clare while she was speaking, leaving him to wonder where they even were now. But as he glanced around, he could make out the vague shape of a stone building, overgrown with shrubs and tree branches. “I have no idea where we are, but I'm feeling pretty intrigued right now.” he commented, driving on carefully until they reached what seemed like the beginning of the area. “In the mood for an adventure?” he queried, lifting his brows at Clare before freeing himself of his seat belt. After stepping out and locking up the car, Eli surveyed their surroundings, walking over to Clare's side of the car. “It's...a church? I think?” he assumed, noting the shape of the structure.

Clare knew that despite how rough things were at home that she was blessed enough to have good friends in her life. Between Alli, Adam, and Eli, she had the type of support system her parents couldn’t be to her. In his own way, Eli had been a true helping hand for Clare through all the ups and downs her parents had been taking over the last few months. He offered her a sense of comfort and security that couldn’t be duplicated by anyone else. Clare supposed her crush on him also had something to do with the way she perceived him but there was no denying that the role he played in her life was an important one. Time and time again he offered his time and attention to her—two things her parents had been failing miserably on as of late. There was no need to downplay how she was feeling. Eli knew her well enough to see through any attempts and actually encouraged her to be raw and uncensored. It was similar to how he lived each day, Clare noted. Even if the boy had his guard up, he never pretended to be anything he wasn’t. That quality, among many others, was that drew Clare to Eli from day one. And as their friendship progressed since the start of term, their connection only grew stronger and took on levels that Clare hadn’t been anticipating—but wasn’t regretful of. She found herself always craving his company by whatever means, whether it was in person or through text, it hardly mattered. Clare couldn’t remember a time she felt like this. Not even the year prior with KC did she felt such an overwhelming sense of yearning for another person. It was thrilling and intimidating all at the same time but instead of running from that feeling, Clare aimed to meet it head on. She laughed softly at his comment, having to agree. With the way her parents carried on, she felt light years ahead of them in terms of maturity. “I wish he would’ve gone too. It would’ve been one less thing for them to argue about,” she huffed. Her dejected mood lightened at his thoughtful words. “It’s still sweet of you to say, thank you.” So immersed in conversation, Clare hadn’t taken notice to their surroundings until she glanced out the window, her brows furrowing. This wasn’t an area she’d ever been to before but she felt safe having Eli with her. Curious as ever, Clare beamed at his proposition, nodding her head enthusiastically before getting out of the car. Her eyes fixed pointedly on the building in shambles; what appeared to be the back wall of the building remained somewhat intact. Just as Clare had deduced what they’d uncovered, Eli spoke her musing aloud. “It is. An abandoned one,” she said softly, daring to get a closer look. “I wonder how long it’s been like this. There’s something so beautiful about it, no?”

Eli wasn't sure if a late night excursion to god knows where was what Clare had in mind when she initially asked if he was busy, but that was certainly the situation they had gotten themselves into. Although the girl ordinarily thrived in predictability, Eli liked opening her up to more spontaneity in her life. She seemed receptive to this outing in particular, which he could only assume was because just about anything beat staying cooped up in a house so full of tension. The fact that she was embracing the unknown at all was encouraging to him, hoping that it would do the trick in getting her sidetracked. Once she arrived back home, things would inevitably get worse again, but he was set on keeping her from that for as long as humanly possible. His eyes widened slightly as he got a better look around, trying to make out the area despite the limited light in the area. He wasn't at all surprised with his own ability to find the most bizarre of places in the middle of the night, when it was hardest to explore. As Clare spoke again, Eli let his gaze drift to her, finding that his intrigue over the abandoned property paled in comparison to how wrapped up he was in her. “Yeah, it is.” he responded softly, realizing he was referring more so to the way she looked just then as opposed to the broken down building itself. Bringing himself back to the present, Eli cleared his throat, taking a few steps around the area. “I think the fact that it's abandoned is the only reason why I'm not catching fire as we speak.” he mused aloud, grinning while skimming his finger over the texture of the one intact wall. “I'd never set foot in a church otherwise. Too holy for my tastes. Not to mention the fact that at least here, there's no preaching to endure.” Flashing Clare a quick smirk, Eli wandered back towards Morty, hopping up on the hood and reclining back against it. “I'm shocked you were so willing to wander in here so late. There could have been murderers or god knows what else in here. Someone's feeling brave tonight.” he noted, visibly impressed with her moxie.

Clare noted just how much better she was feeling just then, her mind focused on something other than her parents and their negative energy. Being out late in the middle of nowhere wasn’t what Clare had foreseen yet it was oddly perfect in a way. A random adventure with Eli took precedence over everything else in her eyes. It was like something out of the books she loved to read, seeking out something new in her hometown. Clare liked the fact that they’d just discovered this place on a whim. It didn’t look like somewhere that saw much life at all. The bushes and grasses were so overgrown and clearly the church had been neglected for some time. To Clare, it was like discovering a secret gem, a hidden treasure right there in the city. The location was so perfectly remote that it was all too easy to forget there was an outside world. Clare couldn’t help but to smile to herself over how often it felt as if she and Eli were in a bubble all their own. This was just the thing Clare needed even though she hadn’t realized it beforehand. Taking in the sights, Clare walked over to what should have been the left wall but was now a few piles of randomly stacked bricks. It was intriguing to Clare who couldn’t stop herself from exploring. In any other context on any other day, Clare would have been wary about exploring these grounds at night but her care simply wasn’t there, especially with Eli by her side. She continued walking around and marveling at what was left of the building before turning to face Eli. She giggled and took a step back. “You know…just in case you get struck by lightning or something,” she said cautiously though she was biting back a smile. “I could start praying now, if you’d like,” she teased. She stood in place for a moment, watching him with her hands in her pockets before walking over to him and getting up on the hood of Morty as well, settling in beside him and lying back gently. She looked up at the treetops for a moment before turning her head to face him. “I’m hoping being on holy ground—no matter how deserted—is enough to keep them at bay. Morty might scare them off though. And besides, you’d defend me, wouldn’t you?” she countered, raising a brow.

Eli scoffed, waving his hand dismissively to her offer. “That's alright, though I'm sure you'd love to do that for me.” he joked, shaking his head to himself. Already her bubbly, mild personality was beginning to resurface, the playful Clare he'd grown so fond of coming to the forefront. He crossed his legs at his ankles, letting one of his feet rest over the other. Stealing a glance at Clare, he wondered if she was going to look around a bit more or join him, gratitude flooding him as she chose the latter. Any form of proximity he could have to the girl was perfect to Eli, though never enough to sate him entirely. He was sure that even if he spent every moment of his life in Clare's company, there would still be that yearning for something more, a hunger that didn't know how to quit. He was sure that she was the kind of girl who could evoke those emotions in just about any guy, no one immune to her kindhearted charm. It was such a contrast to his own personality, making him look like some sort of villain when stacked up against her saintly personality. But Clare never made him feel that way; as if he was somehow less than or lacking in the kind of moral fiber she possessed. If anything, she was the person to attempt bolstering his self-worth the most, even though Eli was sure he didn't deserve the time of day from her. Being too selfish and quite honestly, too smitten to let the girl know that she deserved better, Eli simply kept his mouth shut, willing himself to believe anything and everything that came out of her mouth. Feeling her presence at his side, Eli sucked in a soft breath, trying to wrap himself up in how it felt to be all alone with her. It felt like the rest of the world had broken away from where they were, leaving them as the only inhabitants for the time being. He wouldn't have minded that scenario at all, despite how far-fetched it truly was. Snickering at her reply, Eli propped his head up with one of his arms, resting the other on his abdomen. “With my life, yes.” he quipped, though it was a sincere sentiment. He was a fiercely loyal and protective person, and– not surprisingly – Clare had landed herself at the top of that list as of late. Eli exhaled, letting the breath tumble from his lips slowly, as if to savor it. That was how it felt about the entire evening with Clare, trying to get a firm grasp on each moment before it slipped through his fingertips. “I'm assuming you didn't get a chance to profess your undying love to your crush today, what with everything going on at home.” he questioned as casually as he could, trying not to sound overly eager or concerned about it.

Clare smiled slyly, pleased with herself for having something slick to say in response to him. One of Clare’s favorite things about her relationship with Eli was their banter, the two never failing to go a few rounds with playful jabs at one another. Her parents and their fighting was forgotten now, a thing of the past in comparison to the ease that filled her now. Clare wasn’t sure how Eli did it, the boy so readily skilled in taking her mind off her troubles. He didn’t even have to try; simply engaging in conversation was enough to do the trick. Eli was able to not only capture her attention but keep a serious hold on it. She always wanted to be as close to him as possible but wondered if it would be too odd to him. Recalling their night on the camping trip in which the two watched the stars together, Clare remembered how it didn’t faze Eli at all to have her so nearby. Keeping that in mind, Clare felt brave in sauntering over and settling beside him. More than anything she wished that she could turn in and rest her head on his chest. But just as quickly as the thought came to mind, Clare pushed it away. It was already hard enough knowing that she still had to tell him that she liked him, never mind having musings like that dwelling in her thoughts. Now would be the perfect setting to follow through on the pact. Clare couldn’t think of a better time for them to be alone and there was just something about being in their own corner of the world that made Clare feel like anything was possible. The rules of the real world didn’t apply when they were together and tucked away in this neglected section of town. Anytime Clare was alone with Eli, she had to wonder if he felt the same vibe between them that she always did. During times like this, with the pair lying side by side, it was hard not to become overly aware of each of his movements. She tried in vain to steady her heartbeat but the task was easier said than done as she looked at him. Due to the lack of light, his eyes looked darker, more intense and chilling. Clare was caught off guard by his response, so sure he’d say something funny or sarcastic in response. But the sincerity was unmistakable, leaving her short on words for a moment as she stared at him in silence. Exhaling inaudibly, just smiled, knowing that nothing she said could rightfully serve as a reply to his words. She clung to the euphoric feeling but just as her insides grew warm, a cold feeling sunk in. “Uh, no. I haven’t gotten around to that yet. I don’t think I have the courage to say something to him, no matter how comfortable he makes me,” she said, her eyes never leaving his as if to convey a message to him. “You haven’t told me about how your talk went. Have you spoken to your crush yet?” she asked, trying to sound nonchalant about it.

Eli felt that despite the unpleasant circumstances Clare had contacted him in, the night was making a turn for the better. It was almost too good, if he was being honest with himself. It was still nice out, just a mild chill in the air, and already they'd found a perfect spot to simply share in one another's company without interruptions or distractions. Admittedly, he couldn't stop his mind from wandering to the idea of getting closer to her, maybe making a move to wind his arm around her shoulders, or to turn on his side so he could face her. But fear of rejection kept him resting in his own spot, the one arm behind his head the only form of discipline he had to keep his ideas at bay. He kept himself from making eye contact with her for as long as possible, not trusting his own emotions if he wound up locking gazes with her. It was always a test of some sort to avoid kissing the girl. Eli knew he had the shape and color of her lips already memorized, and he could picture perfectly how the color would probably rush to her cheeks if he got too close to her. They were all telltale signs that the feelings were reciprocated, but at the same time, he couldn't bring himself to fully believe it. Surely Clare spoke to other guys as well, perhaps even one at her church that he would have no way of knowing about. As much as he wanted for her crush to be him, a part of Eli was nervous about that outcome as well. He didn't consider himself especially talented when it came to relationships, not since his last ended so tragically. Those were things he couldn't confide in anyone about; not even a girl like Clare who would probably forgive him for absolutely anything. For the sake of his comfort, his sanity, and the way she viewed him currently, he knew those were things that needed to stay under wraps. A healthy relationship didn't involve secrets as large as the ones he kept, leading him to believe that he wasn't even deserving of such a thing in the first place. Feeling her gaze on him, Eli fought to keep his own eyes settled on the trees hanging overhead. “That sounds a bit contradictory, no?” he asked softly, secretly taking great comfort in the fact that she hadn't yet mentioned it to her crush. It meant there was still hope for him being the person, making his heart race almost painfully in his chest. “You're comfortable with him, but you can't admit it to him? If there's true comfort, then you should know that even if he somehow didn't feel the same, your friendship wouldn't be ruined. You'd still have him to some extent.” he reasoned, finding that his stomach twisted uncomfortably when applying the idea to himself. He could handle Clare not returning the feelings, but knew that being her friend from then on would gut him. As she turned the question to him, Eli sputtered out a short laugh. “Yeah, I've talked to her. Just not about that specifically.” he shrugged. “I don't do well with deadlines, apparently. Neither do you.” he teased, peering over at her before looking away again. “It's just...I want to kiss her, every single time I look at her.” he admitted, closing his eyes for a second so as not to let on the fact that even now, he was fighting the urge. “I want to go up to her and just kiss her, tell her like that. No need for klutzy explanations and the whole nine yards. I might be eloquent in my writing, but she makes me speechless.” As if his heart hadn't been throbbing enough before, now the pounding sensation seemed to consume his entire body, the rhythm traveling down into his legs. “But I can't just do that, right? I'd be crossing about fifty boundaries if I just went in to kiss her.”

Clare didn’t want for the night to end, so perfectly content with being far away from everything and everyone that she honestly could have stayed out on the hood of Morty all night. She felt secure being nestled in the presumably untouched area they stumbled across tonight. With nothing but silence all around them, Clare’s thought focused solely on Eli. That was both a welcomed and dangerous move given their proximity. Yet again she now found herself in a romantic setting with him; outside in a private area closed off to just the two of them. It was hard for Clare’s imagination to not get the better of her. If things were as she wanted them to be, getting even closer to him now would be a viable option. Clare liked the idea of curling into his side or listening to his heartbeat. More often than not, she felt as if her crush on him was reminiscent of a school girl. But Clare didn’t stand a chance of fighting the feelings he gave her so she simply didn’t bother at all. With a guy like Eli, it was easy to get lost in his mystery and aim to figure him out. For as much as he did keep aspects about himself under wraps, Clare was grateful that she was able to see the softer side of Eli that she knew most people didn’t have access to. In school he was known for his sarcasm and indifference, his short fuse and inability to bite his tongue. In truth, all of those qualities were endearing in their own right. But it was this gentle, tender side that intrigued Clare most of all because of how selective it was. That alone made Clare feel as if she was in fact the girl he’d been speaking about so candidly. She knew enough of his personality and social skills to know that he didn’t have many people in school that he cared to speak to, never mind on the personal level he made clear he had with his crush. Just the fact that Eli was softer with her than virtually anyone else made it evident that things were different when it came to her but still, Clare refused to put all her eggs into one basket. For all she knew, there could have been someone in his past that he was still in touch with. Clare disliked how bitter she grew at the mere thought of that. She didn’t have any claims over Eli but all the same, she wanted that prime position in his life, to be the girl he spoke so lovingly about. If it wasn’t her, Clare would have no choice but to accept it and just hope that in time she’d be able to bounce back from what was sure to be a devastating blow. The pact hadn’t reached its expiration yet, leaving just enough time on the clock for some good fortune to come her way. Clare could practically feel her anxiety seeping into each cell of her body and overtaking her but fought to keep her cool. Her hands had a slight tremble in them and she was glad his attention was centered on the trees above them instead. “It is a contradiction. I do know that things would be okay afterwards, even if he were to turn me down. I’m just so scared of looking into his eyes and having him let me down easy, you know?” Sighing, Clare rolled her eyes in irritation of herself, frustrated that even with Eli sitting right beside her, she couldn’t be brave enough to just go for it. Clare laughed in spite of herself. “Normally I’m so prompt,” she said offhandedly. Clare held her breath as he continued, her stomach filling with butterflies as she pictured Eli kissing her without hesitation. It was something she would gladly reciprocate without a single thought and admittedly was a daydream she had more times than she could count. At his posed question, Clare knew she had to say something. Praying that this was a setup of something incredible to come, Clare collected herself and looked to him, her eyes drifting to his pink bow shaped lips and imagining them against hers before searching his eyes. “I think a romantic gesture like that would be welcomed…encouraged even. I don’t see how any girl could possibly turn down a guy like you wanting to kiss them,” she answered, her voice a bit shaky due to nerves. “If it feels right, just do it. Take a chance.”

Eli knew he was making a risky decision in even bringing the pact up again, the topic something he'd made a point not to mention in person with the girl. It seemed far too risky to do, knowing his own impulsive tendencies and how little control he generally had over them. Overall, Eli never trusted himself, but never more than where Clare was concerned. She embodied every perfect, mild, and sacred thing in the world to him, making it so even his best intentions could end up hurting her one day. But his crush on her had blossomed quickly into something else entirely, taking on a life of its own and becoming full-blown infatuation. She lingered in his mind almost constantly throughout the day, his first thought upon waking, and the last before he fell asleep at night. It was only since meeting her that he felt somewhat rejuvenated both mentally and physically, her faith in him seeming to help to some degree, even if it was slight. All Eli knew was that he had been feeling better recently than he had in months, and that in itself felt like a huge accomplishment. Clare was the catalyst for it, making him ten times more terrified to potentially ruin their bond. As her head turned to face him, Eli could feel a ball of nerves building up in his throat, trying in vain to swallow it down. He couldn't be sure if her words were something of an invitation, or at least an indication that she herself wouldn't mind, which was really all he truly needed to know. Even if she didn't feel the same, he was sure she'd be reasonable enough to say so nicely, able to let him down easily even if it killed him to hear. Every time she'd phrase things along the lines of wondering how a girl could somehow reject him, Eli was brought one step closer to fully believing that she was definitely referring to him. Her way with phrasing things felt too personal and too biased to be purely objective. Though there was no way of knowing for sure, he could have sworn there was a hint of a tremble to her voice as she spoke, her last words resonating with him. Holding her gaze, Eli realized this was a situation where he could either throw caution to the wind in the hopes of a positive turnout, or leave the topic untouched indefinitely. He wasn't sure that the second option was something he could handle, prompting him to make a split second decision. Eli propped himself up slightly, turning on his side. The steady throb of his heart was unbearable, hammering away with each inch he cleared between them. His hand settled on her cheek, his own breaths shaky as he skimmed his thumb along her cheek. Before he could read too much into her expression, Eli leaned down, kissing her soundly on the lips. The throb in his chest turned to a billowing ache, his entire body wanting to clear any trace of distance between them. Deepening the kiss slightly, he trailed his hand down her cheek, along her neck and down the rest of the way to her waist. He grasped the curve gently, his body hovering just over Clare's as he parted her lips, daring to dart his tongue in tentatively to meet hers.

Clare couldn’t be quite sure where this discussion of the pact would go but she had her wishes for the outcome. Their conversation had taken a turn somewhere along the way, from hypothetical to all out hinting as far as she was concerned. Clare didn’t have the guts it would take to speak up about how she felt personally but hoped that her stance on the matter would clue Eli in to her what her real thoughts were. It was silly and perhaps childish but Clare couldn’t withstand a rejection from Eli. She was certain they’d still be able to walk away from tonight as friends but she longed for something so much greater than that title when it came to him. Clare wasn’t expecting them to date immediately though she could admit she wouldn’t shoot down the chance if it came her way. To quell her curiosity and grant her some peace of mind once and for all, Clare had to know if Eli truly liked her back. From his approach, it was safe to guess that this was building up to a real turning point for them. Clare wasn’t sure how to even brace herself for something like this. For all her daydreaming and countless talks with her best friend, she could see the distinct difference between musing and reality. In her mind she was always coy and demure but now in the present moment, she was sure she resembled a deer caught in headlights. It spoke to Eli’s ability to get under her skin and completely unravel her. By nature Clare was a shy girl, prone to being bashful and blushing the moment someone gave her a compliment. To this day, no one was better at bringing that response about quite like Eli. He was good for her, even though she was positive he would say otherwise. In the few months that they’d known each other, Eli had managed to change Clare’s life for the better. She could note positive changes in her personality. She was more outspoken and outgoing, actually willing to bend the rules instead of abiding by them religiously. Eli was helping her to come into her own and explore a dormant side of herself and Clare could only thank him for it. Being with Eli was a rush like no other, each day an adventure of sorts and tonight was no different. Clare was certain that she could be anywhere and have a good time as long as she had Eli for company. He was proving that tonight with their current location. There wasn’t anything too remarkable about this untended area and yet it had quickly become a very important place to her. It was a spot all their own in the city, or so she liked to believe they could refer to it as such from here on out. It was special merely because she found it with Eli and if the night was going in the direction she envisioned, it would be a personal landmark for them. Clare did her best to will Eli into kissing her, hoping that he would heed her words and feel compelled to make the first move. Judging by the way he was looking at her now, Clare knew what was coming next but still felt unprepared. Nonetheless, that wasn’t a deterrent in the slightest. After months of pining, her wish was finally coming through and nothing would stop her from going through with it. She let out a soft breath as he touched her cheek, her lips parted still as his own made contact with hers. Clare’s eyes closed instantly, her mouth moving in time with the pace he set. Her heart was ramming uncontrollably in her chest, her mind clouded due to his touches. Clare always imagined that Eli was a good kisser but his level of skill made him an expert in her eyes. She shivered lightly once he clutched her waist, a soft sound escaping her at the feel of his tongue. Unable to stop herself, Clare placed her hands on either side of his face before slipping them into his hair. Her petite hands curled instantly as she continued the kiss, feeling brave and allowing her tongue to become familiar with his.

Eli knew his adrenaline was obvious, his frame trembling above Clare's as they first made contact. For the hundreds of times he'd envisioned kissing her, never had he considered just how unwound he would feel, every last nerve set ablaze by the curly haired girl. For all her sweet, modest charm, it didn't take much at all to leave Eli all but yearning for her – both in a physical and emotional sense. He'd been somewhat starved for physical affection in the prior months, something he could only blame on himself given the circumstances. He hadn't been without options, had he wanted them, but it hadn't even registered as a possibility until meeting Clare. She was his opposite in nearly every sense of the word, their similarities seemingly beginning and ending with ice cream flavors. But he didn't mind the extreme contrast, liking the way it kept him on his toes. They weren't always like-minded, making Clare unpredictable despite her characteristically safe personality. Whether she knew it or not, she'd had him wrapped around her finger for at least a month now, wound so tightly around it that Eli knew a situation like this wasn't far away at all. The fact that she wasn't pulling away served as a rush of relief to Eli, her willingness to partake letting him know everything that she obviously couldn't express with words. Knowing he'd gotten her so flustered and nervous was equal parts satisfying and endearing, but he wanted to ensure her that there was no need. There was no one else to compete with, no doubts in his mind that his feelings for her were sincere. Feeling the small shiver traveling through her body at his touch, Eli inwardly stored that tidbit away, aiming to recall every little move that got Clare squirming beneath him. The sound that followed sent a chill straight through Eli, in awe that he could evoke such a reaction from the girl. At the feel of her hands on his face, he lowered himself a little closer to her, their bodies just barely touching as he fought to maintain a respectful distance between them. Once they meandered into his hair, Eli couldn't hold back the low moan that escaped him, sensitive to her fingers curling around his strands. It was the first time that he could say he literally couldn't bear the thought of a kiss ending, not wanting to untangle himself from Clare now. Pushing the envelope a little, he let his tongue enter her mouth further, taking the chance to learn how it felt to be so intimately engaged with her. The hand clutching her waist only held on more snugly as they continued, his other returning to her face. The kiss was becoming less coy by the second, Eli kissing her with building fervor until he realized he had to put the brakes on the situation. He didn't need to be dating Clare to know that she had specific boundaries, ones that he himself hadn't possessed in quite some time. Slowly, he broke away from the kiss, placing a couple soft pecks on her lips before resting his forehead against hers. "Clare,” he murmured softly, opening his eyes to look at her. His heart was still a raging mess, but there was a significant burden lifted from his shoulders, the relief palpable as he kept his grip on her.

Clare couldn’t stop her hands from shaking, her blood racing so intensely inside of her veins that she felt more like a live wire than an actual human being. From the moment Eli’s hand touched her cheek, a spark within her was ignited, her endorphin amplified to a degree she previously didn’t think was possible. No one had ever looked at her the way Eli did or showed the type of care he never failed to treat her with. To be on the receiving end of such attention felt too good to be true, almost as if her sanity had reached its breaking point and she finally snapped. There was no room for error or confusion, no way for her to mistake that at last, she had the answer she’d been praying for. However unlikely that a guy like him could be drawn to a girl like her, Clare was more than willing to accept that she had this place in the boy’s life. They were the embodiment of opposites attracting, their differences running a mile long. But it was because of that complementary factor that they worked so well together. There was never a dull moment between them, the two never running out of things to say and facts to discover about one another. After the hardship of her first relationship ending the year before, and to another girl at that, Clare liked how it felt to truly be wanted and desired. She knew that Eli closed himself off from most of the world which was why this display of affection and admission over the weeks wasn’t to be taken lightly in her eyes. This moment was major for countless reasons and Clare wanted to savor every last second of it. To pull herself away from him now would be criminal and impossible as she maintained her grip on him. It wasn’t like Clare to lose her head so quickly but as she knew since the start of the year, Eli made her a different person. She would always have her limits and Clare knew that Eli would be respectful of them. But this kiss was exactly what she needed and far better than anything she had in mind. It was just like Eli to do something so bold, hitting as close to the boundaries as possible to ensure maximum impact. Clare couldn’t form a coherent thought in her mind, not that she needed to say anything at all in that moment. Everything she was feeling just then was channeled into the kiss; all the emotions she had for months in her heart were pushed to the forefront and luckily matched. Clare had always loved Eli’s intensity, how fierce he could be and was in awe of just how well that traveled into this aspect of him. This was by far the steamiest kiss she had, one that made the blood rush to her face. She could feel her cheeks burning, her otherwise pale cheeks now crimson but it wasn’t surprising. Eli had a knack for making her come undone with just his words alone. A kiss like this was bound to affect her ten times harder. She fanned her fingers through his hair, threading his locks through the digits and marveling at the texture. She wanted to commit everything to memory: the hard, metallic surface against her back, Eli’s scent and the feel of his hands and lips on her. For a moment she couldn’t believe the sound that left him, stumped that she of all people could get under Eli’s skin to that degree but made a mental note of the fact that it was one of his weaknesses. For any kisses that would come about in the future (and Clare hoped with everything in her that more would come quite soon), she knew exactly what move to execute and was eager to learn more. This was the furthest she’d ever gone with a guy. Even her kisses with KC had never been this hot or dizzying. Just as she realized she was losing her head a bit too much, Eli reeled himself in and brought the kiss to a close. Clare remained frozen, her eyes opening a beat later, letting out a soft breath at the tender kisses he gave her. She smiled widely, her body still shaking noticeably but she wasn’t embarrassed like she thought she would be. Brushing her thumb along his cheekbone, she shuddered at the way he said her name, the sound like music to her ears. “I was hoping it would be me,” she whispered, still stroking his cheek before stilling the motion and pecking his lips. Her lips curled into a shy smile as she looked at him, her eyes bright and cheeks flushed.