#transmysandry

im sorry but um 😒 did your stupid ass just forget we were BORN WITH VAGINAS or something?

"your sexual assault rates dont compare-" wanna know why? 😃 cuz we are put under the statistics of WOMEN. Not trans men. CIS. WOMEN.

or do you just think trans men pop outta the vagina looking like men? like theres no way you are this fucking stupid. "until you get v carded" 😒 when i looked like a woman for 23 goddamm years before getting ahold of testosterone i assure you ive been "v carded" way more than you. i think the one who needs to sit way the hell down is you.

Like. Before my mom had her character development, I would legit get into screaming matches with her and my step dad about cutting my hair. I wanted it short, they didn’t. So, I would self sabatoge and purposefully fuck up my own hair so they would be forced to take me to a hair stylist to chop it off.

I also see an uptick of liberal cis women also always expecting trans men to be these like. Meat shields. They don’t give us a place in topics of reproductive rights even though many of us have uteruses and can get pregnant, but we’re supposed to be the ones to fix cis men.

Many feminist now also forgot that a key tennant of feminism, is you hold EVERYONE to the same moral standard. It’s about gender EQUALITY, not female supremacy. Equality cannot exist in a society that caters to explicitly one gender.

Many people I know (including myself) have been harrassed or assaulted by Cis women. Especially mothers and female friends and partners.

Abigail Shreir bullshit aside, cis women genuinely act like it’s a slight against them to want top surgery or to want to be a man. Part of it is because they view men and masculinity as this inherit threat, an enemy. It’s the same reason they hate trans women, to cis women, trans women are these evil things coming in to hurt them.

Cis women (especially white cis women) tend to think they are the ultimate end-all-be-all oppressed victims, if you are a man you can’t be oppressed. Which obviously is bullshit.

Trans men, Trans women, and enbies are all under the same umbrella, the only way a trans man could have systemic power over a trans women would be if he’s white and she isn’t. Or vice versa. Liberal Cis woman ‘allies’ are also getting farrrr too comfortable here. Like. They expect labor from trans men and punch down on us because they claim we are ‘the oppressor class’ when no, Stephanie, you are just transphobic and using your privilege against me. They act buddy-buddy with trans women, but the moment trans women speak up and are like ‘hey. This is kinda fucked.’ They show their whole ass and viciously turn on them.

Cis women and Cis men are both allies when it comes to transgender oppression and niether of them should be immediately trusted. It’s not our job to fix our cis male counterparts, that’s THEIR (as in cis Male’s) responsibility. Trans men can be an example of healthy masculinity, sure, but you shouldn’t expect us to fix your shitty boyfriends.

Honestly.

(Disclaimer: while I don't agree with those terms, I will use "TMA" and "TME" throughout this post to keep things clear and concise)

1. Transmysogony is real and worth talking about

The intersection between transphobia and misogyny is real and apparent. This isn't up to debate but still worth mentioning to make sure I don't get misunderstood.

Because...

2. We can't neatly divide people into TMA and TME

Gender(-representation/-expression/-recognition) is too complex to neatly divide people into "affected by transmysogony" and "exempt from transmysogony".

Trying to put people into those two boxes just creates an unnecessary binary. Doing so just puts us in a situation where...

3. We have contraproductive infighting

90% or so of transmysogony discourse I see is just TMA people bashing on TME as a catagory. While I understand that it's mostly just people venting their frustrations regarding systematic transmysogony, I think doing this while being hateful towards TME people in generall is just driving s wedge between the transfem and transmasc side of the community.

While fighting the misogyny side of transmysogony, this just empowers the transphobia side.

4. We should name the problem by its proper name:

Transphobia / Transphobes

Mysogyny / Mysogynists

Transmission / Transmysogynists

Someone being TME does not make them a transmysogynist. Conflating these two terms just takes the "man-hating-feminist"-Myth, puts a trans spin around it and makes it real. Creating (trans-) mysandry is not how we fight (trans-) mysogyny.

Closing words:

I would not be surprised if a lot of this discourse is fueled by bad actors purposefully trying to divide and destroy the trans community. We should fight united and not waste our energy in petty discourse.

For whats happening with the modaration here on tumblr, we should put the blame where it belongs: Tumblrs Management and Modaration. They are the ones banning and censoring trans woman, not on other users.

(also, shoutout to the nonbinary and intersex people, of which many are likely somewhere in the middle or outside this whole discussion and probably as confused and divided as I am)

a reminder 😒 that while i absolutely believe some trans fems are being unfairly removed from tumblr just for being fem.....