#transjohn

John froze, whipping his head around to stare at the open door. Jim leaned against the frame, still carrying his luggage, a coy little smile on his lips. Despite their time together, John felt a rush of fear at the thought of being seen like that - open, flushed, muttering mindlessly as he tried to get off. It wasn’t… it wasn’t dignified.

He wasn’t comfortable with his body yet. Nearly four months after his top surgery, he still hated being nude. He hated the thought of anyone seeing him bared and open, of having his identity dragged into question because of something as trivial as scars or genitals. John braced himself for the inevitable comment, but instead of speaking Jim let his duffle fall to the floor and began removing his jacket.

“Jim, I didn’t think you’d be home.”

“Oops.”

Slow, steady hands removed his cufflinks and set them on the dresser. Somehow it felt like a performance; piece by piece Jim removed his clothing, while John trembled against his pile of pillows. He read no hesitation in Jim’s expression, no revulsion, no confusion - just desire. Heat burning in his dark brown eyes, Jim slid out of his boxers and crawled onto the bed behind John.

“I wouldn’t leave you alone during your heat - I’m not cruel.”

As he spoke Jim slid his hands over John’s back, marvelling at the heat radiating from his skin. He knew John balanced on the precipice of fear; it didn’t take a brilliant mind to see his shuddering wasn’t just from arousal. John cared what people thought. John cared that he passed, that other men didn’t see him as ‘lesser’ - and Jim didn’t. To Jim, John was perfect, and he wanted to make sure John knew that.

His fingers pressed into him, slow and strong, kneading his flesh as he worked them lower. Beneath him John groaned, pressing back into his palms. Jim spread him, squeezing his arse as more clear liquid dripped down his thighs. So beautiful, when he was so desperate. For a moment Jim wondered what it would be like to fill both his holes - a toy in one, his knot in the other, holding John in his arms as he trembled and cried and begged for more…

“Jim,” John panted, “If you - you don’t have to do this, don’t feel obligated, please…”

“Oh I want this, Johnny. I want you. It’s rare, to bond without sex, but when I bit you - you felt it, didn’t you? You’re mine, and I want all of you. You’re my good little boy.”

He turned John’s head and kissed him deeply, sliding his hands back up over his skin. John melted, meeting his lips with enthusiasm. He needed to hear that, and Jim knew it. More clear liquid dribbled down his skin, cock twitching as John met Jim’s heavy gaze.

“I am. I’m your - I’m your good boy.”

Jim knew John well enough to read that as consent. He could see it in the way John’s fingers dimpled the sheets beneath him, the subtle roll of his hips to present himself to Jim, and in the low rumble of his voice. John was comfortable. John was ready to be fucked.

“Where do you want me, Johnny? Here?”

With a coy smirk Jim pressed his own hips forward, letting his cock slide between John’s wet lips.

“Or here?”

He raised himself higher, gripping the base of his cock and rubbing it between John’s soft cheeks. “It’s your choice, Johnny, but you’d better make it fast… Wait too long and we just might drown here.”

John rolled his eyes - the joke was meant to distract him from the dilemma they both faced. He felt the ache between his thighs echoed in his muscle; maybe there was a way.

“Both,” he whispered. “Bottom left-hand drawer, there’s - there’s a vibrator.”

“And where do you want your toy?”

John licked his lips and lowered his eyes.

“My arse.”

That was the last thing Jim expected him to answer. John wanted him, then, in one of the most intimate ways he could share himself. Oh, he wouldn’t let that go to waste. Jim leaned over the bed and fumbled with the drawer, working John’s vibrator out of its dark depths as he balanced on the mattress. His fingers closed around the base and he pulled it out safely, turning it in the light to admire it. Light blue, almost translucent… and bigger than he expected, with a faux knot built into the base.

“Some day I want to take pictures of you wearing nothing but this,” he breathed, lubricating the toy just in case. “Filled to the brim, knot inside of you…”

John whined, reaching back with one hand to spread his messy cheeks. “Please. Please, Jim…” Talking only made his need grow worse. That throbbing ache hadn’t abated - he needed to be fucked, hard and fast, again and again until the fire finally died. Jim leaned in close, breath hot against John’s skin as he inspected his muscle. It twitched and quivered, open and ready for the toy he held.

Without warning Jim pressed it into him and John cried out, pressing his hips back against the silicone. It wasn’t as warm as he expected, but it helped relieve some of that empty feeling gnawing at his core. Inch by inch it filled him, until the knot rested against his stretched hole.

“Turn it - turn it on?”

“Not until you say please, Johnny…”

“Please, please! Please turn it on, Jim!”

“Good boy… even in heat, you can’t forget your manners.”

Jim turned the dial and the toy began to shake, sending tremors along John’s curved spine. The hand holding his cheeks apart gripped the base and fucked it into him, hard and fast. Jim seemed content to watch as John played with his toy, never taking its knot even as his hips jerked and rolled.

Not enough. It wasn’t enough for him. John met Jim’s eyes through his long golden lashes, panting hard as he summoned the strength to ask.

“M-More,” he whispered. “Please, Jim… Please give me more…”

“Tell me what you want, Johnny. Tell Daddy exactly what you want.”

“I, I want… I want you to fuck me.”

“Louder,” Jim answered, lilting voice filling John’s ears like a song.

“Fuck me! Please!” John cried, half out of his mind with need. The sheets beneath him were soaked, slightly sticky as his knees dimpled the bed. Sweaty hair matted to his face, hips rutting uselessly, he looked close to coming undone.

“That’s more like it.”

Grinning, Jim pumped his cock twice before lining himself up with John’s dripping hole and pressing into him. It felt torturously slow; John whined and tried to press himself back, but Jim held him in place. When the base of his pick pressed against John’s skin and the toy vibrated against his pelvis, then Jim began to move.

With one rough snap of his hips he’d pinned John down against the sheets, snarling against the back of his throat as he fucked him hard and fast. Full as he was, John felt sheer bliss as Jim filled him. His muscles burned with each thrust and he choked out praises in broken sobs. Nails clawing at the sheets, he met each press of Jim’s hips with eager rolls of his hips.

“Such a greedy boy,” Jim growled. “I cannot believe it takes two cocks to satisfy you, Johnny. What would the other Alphas think if they knew?”

“You - Christ, Jim, you’re enough for me, more than,” John moaned, squeezing his eyes shut. The scent of Jim’s sweat washed over him, momentarily wiping out all rational thought. There was only him, claimed by his Alpha, drunk on the weight of his body and the feel of his cock slamming into him.

Heaven. John found heaven in Jim’s sex, in their bond. Why did he wait so long to give in? Why had he been so afraid?

“Prove it to me, Johnny. Take, take my knot, beg me for it - when you’re ready. I want to know just how much you love being fucked. I want to know you’re mine.”

John whimpered and nodded his agreement. Oh, he’d beg; between Jim’s cock and the toy vibrating inside him, he knew he wouldn’t last. It didn’t matter; he hadn’t been fucked in so long, not by another person, that he knew he’d be ready again as soon as the swelling went down.

Beneath them, the bed creaked and groaned under the strain of their shifting weight. Moaning, spilling onto the sheets with every thrust of Jim’s hips, John could barely focus on anything outside of the pleasure. Now and again Jim would adjust the dial on the toy, sending John sobbing as his climax built low and hot in his gut. The skin stretched around its rubber tingled and ached, but that only added to his ecstasy.

John could feel Jim swelling. He, too was reaching his limits, desperate to come inside of his mewling Omega. Overwhelmed by the hormones and the feel of John around him, he saw no shame in indulging. John just needed to beg…

“Please,” John managed to gasp. “Please, knot me!”

Jim forced the toy the rest of the way in as he buried his own knot inside of John, cock spurting hot and fast inside of him. Once he was sure the rubber knot was secure he slid his hand between John’s thighs and rubbed his fingers along his cock, pressing as he worked the hot nerves quickly. Within moments John tightened around him, more liquid dribbling out around the base of his knot. They collapsed against the bed, Jim draped over John’s body as his arms encircled his shoulders.

“How do you feel, Johnny?” He whispered, pressing lazy kisses to the back of his hair.

“Fucking full,” John chuckled. “That was just what I needed, Jim. God, thank you.”

“Mmn, thank you for sharing this with me. Put any of those fears to rest?”

“For now. Who knows how I’ll feel in the future, but this… You made me feel safe,” he admitted quietly. “Desired, even, and - I’m glad I’m yours, Jim.”