#transitiondiary

Three weeks on the juice.

A little recap:

Changes I noticed were my veins, my voice, my desire to reproduce, my face shape and some more hairs on my upper body. My partner also mentioned my scent and how our whole apartment reeks of pheromones.

It still feels unreal how fast everything changed. I was prepared to wait at least a month for the first noticeable differences. It seems my body just waited for the first chance it got to change itself according to my funny brain. I want to look into trans timelines again, if I can find some similarly fast results. Most posts talk about waiting.

I still haven't told my grandma. If everything works out I'm going to see her next weekend. I don't know what kind of reaction to expect. It won't be mean, but maybe not really understanding.

I also really have to get going on that mail for all my professors. First I should probably get started on all my work for them...

I already did some trans screenprinting!

I had a little T-Party yesterday. My best friend came over and we drank a bit of tea, ate cookies and played minecraft. I even got some presents 💕

My partner is more confused by my voice than me. It's kinda funny, but I also hope they get used to it quickly. Like, for me it's funny, for them it's more disturbing. I don't know if my cats have noticed anything yet.

Life is great. But some days I just want to lie with someone and cuddle. It’s been a long time since I’ve been really intimate with someone (5 years now) so I’m reaching a limit of sorts. I’ve got a couple/few years of transition ahead of me where I think it’ll be tricky to find someone to spend some time with but fingers crossed. I’m not the most sexually driven person at all, but I do crave physical intimacy. 

Picture above is of course Olivia Newton John, my childhood crush. Here’s her amazing video for “Magic”... I’ve always thought it’s an amazing performer who can do these old variety specials and just entertain the audience in such an effortless way on their own in front of this sit down crowd.

And another brilliant one “A little more love” which I think is a really brilliantly written pop hit. Also what an absolute fox. I guess you never get over your first crushes!

But also, check out her makeup! Wow it’s great and that palette and application  would work perfectly today 40 years later.