#tramping

AW KIA ORA!!! you're going to have a blast, I'm sure of it [: I'll keep this brief but informative!! <- update: robin does not know what "brief" means

you need to take at LEAST twice as much water as you think you'll need. dehydration on a hike is an evil evil thing especially around november-feb when it gets hot! half a litre to a litre per hour is good to aim for.

speaking of: water treatment tablets are a LIFESAVER. got to your hut and realised there's no treated drinking water? fill up your bottle, pop in a tablet, and wait half an hour. it's magic and awesome and will stop you from shitting crazystyle from drinking untreated water

for a first time hiker, don't push yourself too hard!! you can see and do a lot in 6-10km. don't go for a 4+ day hike straight away. take lots of breaks, eat frequently, and oh my god please stretch

IF YOU'RE DOING ANY UPHILL TRAMPING. save your calves from agony and find some good calf stretches that work for you

people don't realise but there's an art to stomping up hills. this video is fantastic and has helped me a TON. same guy has other useful tramping tips on his channel!

eat your body weight in scroggin. #scroglife

take a proper hiking pack. not a backpack!! make sure you're familiar with all the straps and be sure to adjust if you're uncomfortable. also: the heaviest things should be packed CLOSEST TO YOUR BACK!!! this stops you from straining your back and makes your pack feel so much lighter

LAYERS. t-shirt -> long sleeved top -> jacket. pants that zip off to turn into shorts if you can find them. even in winter I find myself overheating on hikes. don't be that guy (me)

if you see a pīwakawaka you should make kissy noises at it

make sure to tie your bags up high in trees so that bears can't get it!! oh wait sorry wrong hemisphere disregard

if it's rainy and your trail is near steep cliffs or mountainsides: BE SO FUCKING SAFE AND CAREFUL. almost got smashed by a massive boulder bugstyle when I tramped the abel tasman trail. crashed down on the path a few metres in front of me. loose rock can be dangerous, if you're unsure, stay away from steep areas!!

have fun stay safe be gay drink water get bitten by an eel etc

Sometimes I tell these stories without thinking about them because they're just memories to me. Occasionally though I notice peoples' expressions of disbelief and/or alarm when I relay them. Like when my dog got sued for slander. Or about my first wife, who was a mermaid. These are factual occurrences I have taken for granted which seem to interest some, so I shall attempt to relay some of these tales.

A comforting weight

The track winds in front of me

As my boots find dirt

Mud

Leaves

Sticks go crunch

And birds whistle above

Welcoming me

Avalanche Peak, Arthur's Pass National Park