#tragectory

hey brownie mix can u turn on ur location i just wanna talk

“What the heck is this thing?” Yoshiya blurts out, staring down at the strange plush version of a very weird bird. He instantly loves it, though it’s pretty strange to be getting gifts from a random stranger. When he looks up to ask the stranger what this is, she’s already gone. Whoa, how mysterious!

He holds the plushie close and looks around, but it’s no dice. Hm.

I could have stayed with the same trajectory, or I could choose to work on a trajectory that included integrity and truth, on a disability I didn’t know I had.

Growing up without an understanding of my mental and emotional difficulties, my inner child was desperate to know the truth. At the age of 46, changing my trajectory in terms of taking things in hand, would bring understanding and acceptance.

It is because I have created a trajectory for myself, that I am in a different head space, one that fits me, one that allows me to bring closure on many aspects of my life.

Where the opportunity never arose for me to have an open and honest conversation with my parents as to why I was never told about what I later learned was a disability, and why they chose to ignore my mental and my emotions struggles, and why working through those weren’t an option, I have changed that.

I have had to piece everything together. Through 12 years of writing and research, going through medical notes and recalling many a conversation, I now have answers.

No one with mental, emotional or physical difficulties, would actively choose to ignore their difficulties, but through my books, each of us have an opportunity to change our trajectory, so why not pick up your copy today?

If you want more info, or fancy grabbing your copy of either of my books, check out this link – https://linktr.ee/Ilana_Estelle

                          🌻 Delve into my muse’s life! 🌻

19: Is your muse more self loving or self loathing? 

An incredibly hard mix.

The person she values more than anyone else is herself—not the person she is, but everything she wants to be. She wants to be someone equally as amazing, desirable, and skillful as Eri. To that extent, she loves the person she wishes to become, and she loves that she wishes as much—and doesn’t simply want to be someone else entirely. But, in the end… 

That’s not the person she currently is.

“...!” 

Joshua... honestly didn’t expect anything in return other than perhaps a nice-looking card. This whole...gift-giving and getting thing was quite new to him, after all! He looked down at the present with a small smile and tilted his head a little.

How cute... how absolutely adorable. He couldn’t help the somewhat sentimental look from crossing his face. So very, very cute. He brought the small lizard to his shelf and placed it upon it. Crossing his arms a little, Joshua began doing the minutiae to make sure it was in the best possible position by the other stuffed animals she’d made for him.

He wondered if he should start a collection. He already had his tin pin collection... a stuffed dream eater one might be a lot of work. Especially since Shiki seemed to know just how to make them how he liked... he’d have to rely on her for it. And... he didn’t want to seem like he was only in her company for her sewing skills. Sure, it’d be a good way to protect himself... but...

It’d just alienate her.