#toughtruth

Everyone has them. Those people you look at and know that 15 years later you will love just as much.

In my case I have no romantic version, but I did meet on at the age of 10. She’s my best friend. We go to different schools now but whenever we meet up we can just cuddle and say nothing or talk about anything. They are rare and when you find one you should hold on tight.

And after 4 years at my current school, I’ve realised, I don’t have any forever people there. I struggled with that for a really long time. I wondered ,what was wrong with me? Why can I not find people that mutually want to spend as much time with me as I do with them.

My tumblr is all about how I hope things are better when I get to college. I know that whole “If you never stop thinking about how good things could be in the future you’ll never truly be happy” but I like to think to myself “ This can’t be as good as it gets” . It truly can’t that bad that I hope to one day be surrounded by people who support me and want me around. Not people who seem to think my every comment is irrelevant, unwanted but occasionally comical.

So yeah this is my first post . I want this tumblr to be a digital scrapbook of my journey to a better time.

I guess becoming 2nd priority or second choice sucks. First he tells you that you're the only one, that you're his number one girl, but he still picks his friends over spending time with you. He puts his other female friends before you and he would move mountains to spend time with them. I guess that's when you know that your not as important as thought. That's when you know that 2nd best and 2nd choice is what your ever going to be. I felt like we were closer when we were best friends. When we were bestfriends I didn't need to worry, I just constantly reminded myself that his not mine. And now that he is, I feel like we're further apart.