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statement about someone who tried to paint the sun, but kept making it bigger and bigger, always unhappy with how small it was. eventually they finished the project, and it was just a tiny, tiny speck on the canvas. the statement giver asked them why it was so small. they said "oh, it's not small at all. you're just very, very far away." and when the statement giver looked back at the painting, the speck started growing, getting bigger and bigger, and the statement giver felt like they were falling into the painting. eventually it stopped. the painter was visible next to them again, and they merely whispered "really puts things into perspective, doesn't it?"
I was just thinking about how I got lucky with there being no tma statements that take place in my country, which means I don't have to deal with hearing about spooky shit that happened in a place I may see in my daily life or that's just hours away
Well, now there's a suspiciously Pomberito shaped devil on my shoulder whispering about how I should write a fan statement set in Argentina (maybe some supernatural bullshit happened to a turist or the statement giver moved countries afterwards)
Actually, maybe everyone should write statements set in their countries/about their local folklore. It'd be fun
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Hi uhhh i think i might make a tma statement soon /hj
So basically, I've already been feeling like the distortion is after me (for example, ive been like seeing more shapes and stuff than usually, i couldve sworn my workschedule for this week was different than it currently is, etc.)
But today, when I got off the bus, I noticed an interesting poster/sign hanging on a pole. I mean, it's normal for poster/signs to hang on that pole, but this one was like. A tma reference :D
Basically, it was for a kinda concert/festival called: INTO THE GRAVE which like, okay buried. And in the smaller letters next to it, it said: Death is on our side! Like okay End...
But when I decided to take a look at the names standing on it, which I assume are like the preformances on the festival, it had names like: Self Deception, Picture, Predatory Void, Inhuman Nature, Insomnium, Crimson Glory, Insanity Alert, The Narrator, and Severe Torture which are like probably standard names for the music that plays at that festival (which is i assume either hardcore or metal) but still. I think they're pretty TMA coded.
BUT among those names, I saw MY OWN FUCKING LAST NAME???? As second act. Again, it could be a coincidence, it's not really a rare name but also. Not really populair cuz for example my teacher always spelled it wrong and i havent met another classmate with the same last name.
OH AND THE BACKGROUND OF THE POSTER IS THE FUCKING GRIMREAPER :D
Another TMA statement :( I do know nobody cares but I have a bunch and was reminded of this one the other day so I'm throwing into the void. I have a few more I'm sitting on so I might post those eventually.
Carnivore Diet
Statement of Matthew Torsten regarding a friend's obsession with a diet influencer. Statement taken April 19th, 2013.
Statement begins,
I'm only giving this statement so you can help me. My friend is gone but you have to do something about whatever has taken his place. I still don't understand it but I know that thing is not my friend. I can't think of what could've happened to make Alex whatever thing he is now. I just want my friend back. He didn't deserve this.
It all started with the gym, both me and Alex enjoyed working out so when we decided to start working out together. It was a win for me because I was always kind of antisocial and now I'd always have someone to spot me. He was always more into the appearance side of it than I was, I didn't do it to improve my looks. I had a girlfriend who didn't care what I looked like and I was happy, but Alex was always a diet nut type. The kind of person to jump from meal plans to vitamins and anything else a buff guy on the internet was selling him. He was always telling me about the new things he was trying in order to get his "dream body".
I didn't mind it really, it was really his business what he put in his body. And he never seemed to be getting unhealthy about, not seriously at least. I really shouldn've done something about it then, he was clearly not okay. I don't know if it really was that obvious or if it's just hindsight. I hope hindsight, I hope I wouldn't have been so oblivious as to miss my friend slowly destroying himself. All in the name of a body that looks nice in the mirror.
Recently, maybe the month before last, he had been getting annoyed with his progress. More than his usual. He said that he wasn't improving, I didn't get it but I also didn't care to argue. He started acting weird for a while, he still came to the gym with me and everything was the same there. But the staff would tell me how he started coming more and more often, even without me. Even throughout the night. He started to get distant as well we hung out less and less outside the gym. I was definitely worried, hr couldn't have been getting enough sleep and clearly something must have been wrong.
Then he begin ignoring my calls, which didn't help my concerns. He didn't really have anyone else that cared about him and I didn't want to see him work himself to death. So the next time we were at the gym I asked him if he was okay, he didn't seem surprised that I asked, just tired. He said he was fine but that he just felt very stagnant in his progress, that he wanted to push harder.
I just told him to be careful. I wish I hadn't, I wish I'd just listened to my instincts and told him anything else. That he should stop, suggest a break, insist on a break, because none of this would have happened if I could've pulled him out of this early. If he hadn't felt so wrong. If he wasn't him. But he was and now he isn't.
I hate to admit this but I started pulling away too, my girlfriend's lease had ended and decided to move in with me. So, of course I had to help her. I started missing going to the gym for allowing her get settled. I only missed maybe 3 weeks of workouts, but when I got back he was like a different person.
He was happy, when we went to the gym together for the first time after those weeks he spent the entire car ride excitedly explaining this new routine he was doing. I was happy to listen, it was nice to hear him happy. He told me about a diet coach and the methods. Something about only eating raw meat, insane. But that wasn't the main thing that caught my attention, it was the name.
A John Branson, I had heard of him before. It was hard not to when you know so many gym bros, including Alex. He was almost an urban legend, a public persona, yes. He was a big guy who was definitely on steroids despite what people will tell you. But also a course, a very expensive course. Most people knew of him but I had never heard of someone believing his bullshit enough to sign up for the course. It had sounded like a complete scam but I couldn't stand kill Alex's joy so I just nodded along.
He sounded excited but there was also, even then a hunger in his voice. I wish I had noticed something was off back then but I didn't. I just let him blow money and fight for an impossible, drugged up goal. I should've tried harder.
Alex stayed happy after that and he definitely got bigger, he seemed to love his improvement so I didn't say anything. He told me how he was eating everything raw and I joked about how he was eating like an animal. He agreed. It was funny, he was making progress, somehow. So I had put aside my hesitations and assumed that maybe the new diet was working.
He'd always be telling about the "life coach", how much they stress you only eat unseasoned fresh meat, that you only eat it raw, and that you only drink water. How important the proper "consumption" was to improvement. I wish I had asked more questions, digged deeper. But I only really began to get worried when he started missing our gym days, he had never done that before. At first it was just one week, then three, then he stopped showing up at all.
I don't know what happened to Alex while he stopped showing up at the gym. I can only tell you what I found in his apartment last week. After he stopped showing up I was understandably concerned, Alex doesn't just skip the gym. So I texted and when he didn't answer those I called and when he didn't answer those I figured maybe he was just exploring new diet like he had last time.
Only after maybe a month of him no-showing at the gym and ignoring my texts, did I think to visit his apartment. It was only a short jog away so I figured I could stop by on my way to the gym, maybe ask if he wanted to come. I made my up the stairs because the elevator's been broken for years. Alex liked that, he said it forced him to not get lazy. I walked past the doors until I reached Alex's.
Then I knocked and I knocked again and again. But Alex never answered, so I tried to open the door. It was unlocked. I walked inside and it was quiet, tense quiet but there was something I could hear. Muffled by walls but not quiet enough to ignore. It got clearer as I got closer to his bedroom, near the far back of the apartment. A wet knawing sound like an animal chewing through bone.
When I got to the door it was louder, I could hear whatever it was ripping the flesh from the bone. Wet, hungry sounds. I slowly opened the door and it was something. Sitting on his bed there was something. Something barely regonizable as once human facing a bright laptop screen, the only light in the room. Illuminating the whole scene in bright red. I didn't want to approach it but I don't think it could have done anything to me, it looked incapable of motion. That thing wouldn't have noticed me if it was. So I walked ever closer.
I could read the screen now, "Consume" that word scrolling over a background of blood red gore. And the sound was so much worse now, the squelching and bone crunching was horrible. I could see it, as I watched Alex bite into his arms and chew. Ripping flesh from bone. It was animalistic, his focus despite his actions. He didn't even seemed to register any pain. Just eyes almost entirely covered in drooping flesh locked to that screen. Empty but still attentive.
I didn't know how to react, I just stood staring as what I knew was once my friend ripped chunk after chunk of bloody meat from his body. I knew I couldn't stop him, I knew I couldn't call the cops. What would I tell them? So when I heard about this place, I thought maybe you could help me but I know you can't. That thing isn't my friend anymore, I know he's gone. I just wish I had seen it sooner. I just wish I had done something.
----------- Statement Ends
This statement is concerning if true, the "Alex" in this statement was clearly suffering from some form of eating disorder and possibly body dysmorphia. It's with statements like this where the degree in psychology comes in handy. Also just in the profession but that's off topic.
Mr. Torsten had elected to not be contacted so there is no way to get further information on his friend.
So thanks to that there is no way to look into him specifically, we didn't get the full name of this "Alex" when the statement was given for some ungodly reason and the popularity of the name makes it functionally impossible to look deeper.
But I can say there is much to be found on this John Branson. A fitness and wellness influencer in name but seems to be, in practice, a walking advertisement for the infamous course mentioned in the statement. Combine that with the habit of pushing disorder mentalities when it comes to eating and you have a recipe for, well, this. We did try to contact him, weirdly easy to do, to ask about an Alex but I doubt that will be fruitful.
