#time changes things

It’s September again and I have a friend, a guy friend. And it doesn’t feel wrong or dirty or that we are using ‘friend’ as a moral coverup for something so not okay. And I am having oranges again, two for breakfast, three before bed. It’s September again and my favourite authors are releasing new books and I am forming a more organised system for annotating books I like the experience of reading, of devouring. It’s September again and I am getting to know a person who I want to nickname my green sapling because I can already feel myself beginning to heal in his presence. It’s September again and there are more strands of white hair than I thought I’d have at twenty seven and this time it is just being accepted as a little misery of life instead of hating myself and my body. I have given up on trying to eat with chopsticks and giving new kdramas a try; it’s September again and I keep going back to old favourites that comfort my heart and make me laugh. 11:11 wishes are now more for others than for me; this September I am learning to draw boundaries and accept that I am things other than just a pleasing person. Saying no, not showing up, not responding—without giving elaborate reasons. If you don’t understand my no, I don’t owe you a five-page explanation or application. It’s September again and I am wearing red and yellow on my wrist and clarity on my heart’s desires—this September, I feel as light and crisp as a leaf that has decided to let go and go with the flow.

heya ppl make mistakes and so do you.

Sometimes, you meet people in summer. You talk to them all night and be with them all day. Sometimes, you be with them all the time so as to eradicate any difference between day and night. You're fun. You take risks. You say to hell with to restrictions and anything that bounds you and your desires. But then it ends. Summer ends. You go back to your school, college, work or whatever it is that sucks you back into a routine. A life where you have work to do and goals to achieve. You can't stay up all night anymore. You can't meet them everyday. You can't say hell to your targets and tests. Did you change? No. Time changed, like it always does.