#third wheeling

chigiri hyoma

the first time he comes over and sees your big-ass dog curled up on your bed like it pays rent, he just blinks. 

“he sleeps with us?” 

you nod and kiss his cheek. “only if he’s in the middle.” 

he’s internally like: oh. okay. cool. love this for me. 

chigiri adores animals. he really does. but when it’s midnight and he’s trying to pull you closer, and your dog growls just a tiny bit when he gets too close– 

he whispers dramatically: “your dog hates me.” 

you’re half-asleep like, “he just likes to be near me.” 

“so do i, babe.” 

eventually he starts sneaking in gymnastic-level maneuvers to at least hold your hand under the dog’s chin. 

sleeps with his head pressed to the pillow so close to you that you can feel his breath on your shoulder. like he’s trying to out-snuggle the dog. 

starts bringing your dog those fancy hip-and-joint treats, brushing its fur, taking it on runs just to earn brownie points. 

dog still chooses to lay between you two every night like a brick wall. 

chigiri accepts his fate but tells your dog every night: “i’m watching you.” 

nagi seishiro

he just wanted to nap with you. he didn’t sign up for being third-wheeled by a 120-pound fluff monster. 

“this bed’s not big enough for all of us, y’know.” 

lies down anyway. just lets your dog take over like a defeated man. 

one time he woke up to your dog laying on his legs while you were curled up next to it. “… am i furniture now?” 

doesn’t move though. just sighs and pulls the blanket up higher. if the dog lets him stay in bed, he considers it a win. 

occasionally whines like a child: “it’s too hot… can’t we train him to sleep on the floor?” 

“he’ll cry outside the door.” 

“ugh. guilt-tripping me like reo.” 

tries to out-lazy the dog. if the dog is snuggling with you, he’s gonna snuggle harder. full-body drape. you’re buried under nagi and the dog like a human sandwich. 

ends up loving the dog secretly though. takes pics of it sleeping on your lap. starts letting it nap on his chest during the day. 

tells reo: “i have a roommate now. he’s fluffy and possessive.” 

kaiser michael

this man thinks he’s the dog. 

seriously, when he finds out your giant creature of a dog has been laying claim to the spot right next to you, he scoffs like, “that’s my seat, fluffball.” 

the first night he tries to sleep over, he struts into your room, sees your dog already curled up on the bed next to you, and just freezes. 

“what is this, the boss level of cockblocking?” 

attempts a power move. 

flops onto the bed and lies directly on top of the dog. “move. daddy’s home.” 

your dog does not move. does not care. it just sighs. 

eventually, kaiser’s the one who rolls off and grumbles while spooning a pillow instead. 

he glares at your dog every night like they’re rivals in a romcom. “go ahead. enjoy it while it lasts. one day you’re gonna get tired and move, and i’ll be right there.” 

but during the day? oh he spoils that dog like crazy. buys him a designer collar, steak treats, luxury dog bed (that the dog never uses), even a little hoodie with “kaiser fanclub” embroidered on it. 

you catch him once whispering “you and i both love her, huh? let’s truce.” into the dog’s ear. he denies it. 

isagi yoichi

he was so excited to finally sleep over and cuddle you. brought his little overnight bag, brushed his teeth early, already picking out which arm he was gonna use to pull you close– 

and then he sees your enormous dog already hogging 80% of the bed. 

“uh… where am i supposed to go?” 

you gesture to the remaining sliver of mattress. “right there, if you don’t mind the edge.” 

bless his heart, he still tries. 

he lies down sideways, twisted like a croissant, arm half reaching over your dog just to hold your hand. 

every time the dog shifts, he flinches. 

“did he just growl? was that a growl?” 

you: “no, he’s just breathing.” 

“he breathes like a tank.” 

after a few nights, he gets used to it. even starts whispering “goodnight” to the dog. 

one time he found himself spooning the dog by accident in the middle of the night. he was like “well. this is my life now.” 

secretly proud when your dog lets him nap next to both of you. like it’s a test and he passed. 

shidou ryusei

“awww, your dog loves you more than i do. how cute.” 

immediately beefs with the dog. 

brings a tennis ball to the bedroom, throws it down the hall, and tries to trick your dog out of the bed so he can claim the spot. 

your dog doesn’t even budge. just stares at him. 

“damn. alright. i respect that.” 

ends up just plopping down on the other side of the bed like a chaotic little gremlin. spreads out like a starfish. 

if the dog kicks him in his sleep? he kicks back. lightly. lovingly. 

“c’mon, pup. let me spoon your mom.” 

probably tries to bribe your dog with bacon. ends up accidentally training him to bark at shidou on sight for treats. 

laughs about it like it’s the funniest thing ever. 

calls the dog his “furry rival” and “fluffy side chick,” but still gives it head pats. 

totally fakes a pout in the morning like “ugh, i didn’t get any cuddles last night. so unfair. i need compensation, babe.” 

bachira meguru

“OH MY GOSH LOOK AT HIMMM. LOOK AT HIS BIG FLOOFY FACE. AAAA.” 

absolutely obsessed with your dog. immediately drops to the floor and rolls around like he’s trying to become part of the pack. 

you leave the room for one second and come back to them doing zoomies around the house. 

he fully expects to sleep in a giant cuddle pile with both of you. 

when the dog wedges himself between you and bachira in bed, he just smiles like “cute!!!” 

lays one arm over the dog and uses the other to hold your hand. 

whispers to the dog like “we’re her boyfriends now. this is a throuple.” 

if your dog snores? bachira harmonizes. 

if your dog farts? “mood.” 

he even starts copying the dog’s expressions like he’s trying to become his best friend. 

sometimes you wake up and he’s got your dog on his chest like a weighted blanket, mumbling: “he loves me. i knew it.” 

itoshi rin

rin thought you were joking when you said your dog "has to sleep right next to me or he gets upset." 

he was like, "cool, me too” … and then he met the dog. 

rin lies down carefully, like he’s sneaking into enemy territory. the dog gives him a side-eye. rin gives it one right back. 

you fall asleep in like 10 minutes, cuddled up with your dog. but your boyfriend is wide awake. 

“what the hell is this mutt’s problem…” 

he doesn’t move a muscle all night. he is stone. frozen. clenched jaw. silently fuming. 

wakes up with a crick in his neck and a burning need to prove himself to your dog. 

eventually, your dog stops sleeping between you two… and just sleeps on top of rin’s legs. 

rin: “… fine.” 

never says he loves the dog out loud. but one time you walked in on him letting the dog rest its head in his lap while he scrolled through his phone and scratched behind its ears. 

he saw you, glared, and muttered “don’t say anything.” 

You weren’t sure what to expect when Leo insisted on introducing you to “the real MVP” of his life—but you definitely weren’t expecting a twenty-foot bronze dragon to land two feet in front of you, snort steam at your face, and then nuzzle into your hand like a giant, purring metallic puppy.

“Festus,” Leo said with a proud grin, hopping off the dragon’s back. “Meet my favorite person.” You raised an eyebrow. “You mean me or him?”

Before Leo could answer, Festus let out a warm mechanical chirr, coils of steam twisting into the air as he gently nudged your side again—tail curling protectively around your legs like you were some fragile thing that needed guarding. His eyes flashed bright amber, glowing with a weird kind of fondness you didn’t know was possible from something made of gears and fire.

You blinked. “…I think he likes me.”

You gave the dragon a gentle scratch on what might’ve been his cheekplate, and he leaned into it with a low, happy rumble. You glanced at Leo with a teasing smirk. “Festus loves me more than he loves you, huh.”

Leo’s jaw dropped slightly. “Excuse me? I made him. From scrap. In a cave. During a war.” Festus beeped again, even louder this time—like he was confirming your claim. Leo threw his hands in the air. “Unbelievable. Absolute traitor.”

Leo paused. His grin faltered, just for a second. “Likes you?” he echoed, brows furrowing. “He’s cuddling you. Dude—Festus doesn’t even do that to me unless I’ve updated his core processor or fed him celestial bronze scraps by hand.” Festus let out what sounded suspiciously like a smug beep.

You were still crouched next to Festus, giving him cheekplate scratches and telling him what a very good metal boy he was, when Leo plopped down beside you with a theatrical sigh.

“I can’t believe this,” he muttered, flinging a blade of grass into the wind. “You’ve known him for like, ten minutes. I built him. I coded his loyalty circuits. I literally gave him a heart—and now he’s wagging his tail for you.”

Festus beeped smugly and nudged your side again, almost like he was agreeing.

You laughed, brushing hair out of your face. “What can I say? I’m charming.”

Leo gave you a sidelong look, trying to hold back a smile. “Yeah. You are.”

Your hand paused on Festus’s bronze scales. You looked up at Leo, surprised by the softness in his tone—and the fact that, for once, he wasn’t teasing.

The two of you just looked at each other for a moment. The wind played with his curls, and Festus let out a gentle mechanical rumble like he was holding his breath.

Then, Leo leaned in, his voice dropping just a little. “You know, if I had known all it took to impress you was a giant fire-breathing dragon, I would’ve introduced you to Festus sooner.”

You tilted your head, grinning. “Oh, I was already impressed. The dragon’s just a bonus.”

Leo’s breath hitched—just a tiny, barely-there sound—and before either of you could overthink it, he kissed you.

It was soft. Warm. Tasted a little like the cinnamon gum he always carried and smelled faintly like engine grease and ozone—like Leo.

When he pulled back, there was a dazed little smile on his lips.

Then Festus whacked Leo’s shoulder with his tail.

“OW—hey!” Leo swatted at him. “Traitor and cockblocker? Unbelievable!”

You burst out laughing, clutching your side as Festus chirped smugly and curled tighter around you.

Leo rubbed his arm, grumbling under his breath, “I build you with love and celestial bronze and this is how you thank me?”

You wiped tears of laughter from your eyes and leaned your head against Leo’s shoulder. “Jealous of your own dragon, Valdez?”

He sniffed. “Only because he gets more cuddles.”

You smiled. “You could’ve just asked.”

Leo turned bright red. Festus beeped like he was gloating.