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there’s  a  silence  that  comes  with  hearing  those  words.  it  takes  connor  back  to  that  night  on  the  roof.  it’s  not  something  he’s  supposed  to  remember.  he’d  said  something  similar  to  the  deviant  he  had  been  trying  to  stop,  and  it  hadn’t  ended  well  for  him.  these  are  memories  he  wishes  he  could  forget,  that  he  wishes  he  didn’t  have  in  the  first  place,  and  he  certainly  didn’t  want  anyone  else  to  have  them.  he  knows  that  logically,  lee  isn’t  alive,  that  he  isn’t  alive,  but  is  it  really  that  simple?  or  that  logical.

“i  don’t  want  to  kill  you.”  he  figures  that  he  might  as  well  start  there.  his  hands  are  held  out,  not  defensive,  but  an  attempt  to  show  that  he  doesn’t  mean  any  harm.  and  the  truth  is  that  he  doesn’t.  connor  is  doing  this  to  stop  more  people  from  getting  hurt,  or  at  least,  that’s  what  those  in  charge  tell  him  he’s  risking.  deviants  were  dangerous.  he’d  witnessed  that  firsthand.