#the pineguard

Okay so we all know how the Pineguard wears their patches bc if they don’t have Sylvan wool they’ll go kinda bonkers as soon as they step onto the other side?  That never really made sense to me, bc when animals step over they gain sentience, and humans are just a really advanced type of animal, so like, what gives?

I was thinking about this and it hit me that it was the Quell.

She knew that humans had taken Sylvain from her, and like Griffin said she wanted to find them and she wanted to destroy them.  So when humans dared step foot through the archway, she struck and took them over as quickly as possible.  In the beginning, when Duck enters the gate, Griffin describes how he’s taken over with this indescribable rage and hatred, which is exactly how Thacker felt when he was taken over, too!  

The Sylvan wool, like most things from Sylvain, probably has residual energy from the planet, which makes them at very least less susceptible to the effect the Quell has when wearing it.

So @themlet wrote a really great story about the old guard and I really needed to draw all of it but I don’t want to spoil the whole glorious thing before you go read it -->  https://archiveofourown.org/works/19774195 It’s so damn funny and sweet and Mama and Thacker spend most of it ogling Barclay so that’s fun.

Okay playing off the other post I will now go into further detail of my many theories.

Case A

When Barclay was on the run he ate at lots of truck stops. IHOP became a staple, a place where people were friendly, didn’t ask questions, and he could get a hot meal. He’s had to move constantly but no matter where in the USA he is, the pancakes at IHOP are the same.

Case B

After Mama found Barclay, it kinda became a tradition for the pine guard to go to a IHOP after defeating an abomination. There was one outside of Kepler and it was a bit of a haul, but they only did it every two months. Thacker, Barclay, and her would all squeeze into a booth and order too much food. Thacker ordering the nastiest shit off the menu without fail- some limited time desert special that was a crime against god and nature. Then they’d leave a large tip for the waitress and disappear. It became enough of a regular occurrence the staff knew them all by name... the last time they went was right before Thacker left.

Case C

Agent Stern has the two images above printed out and pinned to a elaborate bulletin board full of red string. Upon finding out that Barclay is BIGFOOT the first thing he does is- well.. contemplate his entire life- but! the second thing he does once the apocalypse is over is take Barclay out on a date to.. you guessed it.. IHOP. It’s the type of casual low pressure thing that’s appropriate for that awkward conversation between two friends who have know each for forever, but are in uncharted territory. Also. Important. Agent Stern has very much never been in a IHOP before and Barclay finds this VERY funny.

Bonus

“Before the stars come out tonight

Come bathe with me in the light

Danger is now out of our sight

So come meet me, under the pines”

[Id: Drawing of the Pine Guard standing against a sunset. Duck is a tall, Asian man with a curly mustache and some stubble. He has blue streaks on his hair.  Aubrey is smiling. She is a dark skinned woman with a lot of piercings and a jean jacket. She has poofy red hair. Thacker is light skinned, short person with light brown hair with orange streaks. On the background, against the starry sky, there are the light outlines of the scarf of Ned Chicane.]

"How about the city of Chicane"

"Would you... come with me?" "Yeah"

"He turned on the tv and thought 'Well theres a forest i can help"

"Now lets have an adventure!"

Y'all this finale hit me so hard because the pineguard looked around at all the things they'd accomplished and each of them decided y'know what we're not done yet.

And maybe its not all big and flashy some of its pudding trees and comforting the people who are scared. Some of it is just a bed for the night and some bad gorp for the road. Sometimes its a few more trees in the ground. Sometimes its movie night to remind your community how weird and wonderful movies, and life can be.

[Image description: A drawing of Ned, Aubrey and Duck posing in various dumb ways. Each character is colored with a specific color and it’s various hues. Ned is purple, Aubrey is red and Duck green. Behind them is a purple background full of sparkles, and above them in the comic sans font reads “The Pineguard.”]

Abominations cower before them!

[Imade description: A screenshot of a tumblr ask sent by @jon-snow-is-the-4th-mcelboy who said “Please P l e a s e do the amnesty trio. Aubrey in 2, Duck in 5 and Ned in 8.”] Also a header edits under the cut because I mean, I’m sure someone wants it:

And the sheriff was asking Ned about what's up in Kepler

And now Keith knows... And now the Hornets know...

Basically what I'm saying is that these hunts are not only popping up more often, and becoming more dangerous and complex but

I don't know how much longer they're going to be able to keep it a secret

I think all of Kepler's going to find out, sooner or later.