#the diddler

You can not convince me otherwise that the woman is to blame for this man. And I'm not saying what the things this man did. I aren't heinous because they truly are, but the way he was brought up, I can't even begin to imagine how bad it was. This woman is allegedly a madam, and I totally believe it. She's got the look of it. And even in the pictures that I ve put up is the picture slide, she's trying to look like cathy, in some of them in that outfit. And when you see her with puff, they look like a couple more than a son and mother.

The way she probably groomed him from such a young age and Cassie even said some very disturbing things about this woman that she would show Cathy. This is how you deal with him if you won't shut the fuck up. And she proceeded to sit on his face on his mouth.

This is the thing of generational trauma, it leaks down and down and then we wonder why the victims become perpetrators, because they were showing such a disgusting life and I dread to imagine what sort of home he grew up in. And the fact that he's a vigo moon, this is what I don't understand. All scorpio, moon are in detriment , okay, I'm telling you now. I never understand why Virgo is him because it's cold, it's not very warm, it's icy. Almost, it's like if earth and all elements of earth, capricorn would be a tree, tourists would be the soil and then Virgo would be

This is either bullshit or he didn't know what he was on.

Having been through the 80s and 90s, one does not dig through trash for one more hit of coke. I'm sorry, that's bullshit. One, however, does dig through trash for one more hit of heroin. You see kids, back in the late 90s, coke had become so popular that it was everywhere and cheap. It was a blizzard like the 80s.

However the DEA, under G. W. Bush, decided to crack down on that. It was a somewhat quiet drug war. The import was drastically cut, unless you were a disgustingly rich Democrat voting liberal, which many in Hollyweird are. The price went up, the volume went down.

So many dealers began pushing blends. Coke blended with heroin. Coke blended with Molly. Coke blended with baby powder (I shit you not). Coke blended with diazepam (marketed as "all of the high, none the wise" -- for use at work. Get more done and be chill.). Coke with meth didn't work out well, but it also has been a thing.

This leads us to why Pulp Fiction has a scene where the unsuspecting Mia snorts up a fat rail of ultra pure, white powdered heroin.

The more impure it is, the darker in color it is.

White heroin can be blended into coke well. However, it's not hard to mistake white heroin for coke. They look the same, but coke is finer, softer, and fluffier. That's why it's also called snow.

Blends of coke get clumpy. It's more like Chicago street snow near noon after a heavy morning dusting. Not nearly as fine, soft, or fluffy. However, it's far more addictive because of what is mixed into it, excluding baby powder because you got ripped off.

The fact that Mia's nose bled was more about her habitual use combined with the drug's effect increasing blood pressure while reducing blood flow. Aside from that, heroin has a stronger psychological effect than coke and is way more dangerously addictive. That shit'll flat out turn a cuddlefuck into a rape before murdering you in the process with an ice pick up into the base of the skull with a swivel.

Coke won't do that. Coke is like your super hot party friend who can pound drinks, dance wildly, rides in cars through sunroofs, does the craziest things imaginable, and talks about everything and nothing that would span hours but is crammed into rapid 5 minute intervals. Coke is the kind of "woo!" girl that ski's down Mt. Baldy with her tits out at what she thinks is high speed, but it's the green course and she's only going just slightly faster than everyone else. Coke is fun to you, but totally cringe to everyone else.

I have never, in all of the wildest parties and clubs I've been to, seen anyone so addicted to cocaine that they scavenged for it.

It lets you down gently, so you think. You just crash and wake up fine and dandy in the morning. You're slower, not groggy, and you're a fog. You remember details of the night through the next few minutes, with vivid recollection. You cringe at yourself, and get on with your day... until you notice someone in your bed, but it's not your bed, it's someone else's house, and you remember the bursts of images because you're beginning to shut down. The sensations, sounds and feelings of banging or being banged by that other person with great recollection. You just might not remember their name and your sexual preferences may be queried.

Who knows, you might have liked it.

I'm a depraved woman who swings like a barn door in an EF4. I don't care as long as everyone had fun. At clubs, it was nice being the hot girl everyone wanted because I could dance like fire. But I digress...

This isn't about me. This is about Jason.

I have a feeling that what he remembers as coke was probably cut white heroin. I don't think his 20s ass did fat lines. I think he didn't completely know he was getting pumped with coke cut with heroin. There was a special name for that, because it was expensive. It was frequently floated around the Beverly Hills cliques because it got people hot and horny, and down for anything, because the effects of coke were also the effects of heroin. It would make you feel sexy, open to suggestion, relaxed, but excited for even shit music.

Having been to a Beverly party with a bunch of "hypocritical Democrats with too much money compassionate about the poor but spending $200 per ounce of drugs every night" raging in $1,000+ clothes in some nerdy rich kid's mansion because their parents are out, with a bunch of poor clubbies they like to hang out with from the eastern LA suburbs and some questionably aged to boot, I can attest that Diddy did do it, because it was happening everywhere in Beverly Hills and the wealthy side of Hollywood in the early 2000s. I once saw some girl do a tab of Molly some very old dude gave her, then a pair of fat rails of that aforementioned mixed coke-heroin some other guy about twice her age gave her, and then she pounded a few shots of vodka that she probably shouldn't have been given, dance like a stripper and then be led into a nearby office-room. The door was left intentionally open so people could hear and watch as these two 40-60 year old men that gave her all that, fucked the shit out of her on a leather couch along with a 35-45 year old woman that was already in the room.

That's what that shit does to you. So it's more likely that Jason here was scrounging for that shit in the trash than anything else. He just doesn't remember it well enough because of how long ago it was and because heroin doesn't let you remember the details, only the regret. So you need more of it to continue fucking the pain away.

Personally, I loved those parties in the 90s until they got weird. I blame Diddy. People began showing up in costumes, acting like sex vampires and talking like cult leaders. I stopped going when things began leaning that direction. It was fine when it was clubbers getting together, the occasional orgy. It wasn't fine when older wealthy men and women in the 40+ range were showing up routinely with bricks and fucking anyone younger, male and female, that they could exert themselves upon however they liked. I ranked it up as abuse, borderline rape parties.

Straight guys fed that stuff were forcibly molested, but because of the drugs and alcohol? Bangarang. It was the same for younger women by older women, too. A couple of cougars pounced on a 20-something girl, pinning her to a wall from the dance floor, and just went to town. They actually tore her clothes off in a living room in front of the other oblivious or watching partiers.

I'm not telling all of this to get people hot and bothered. I'm saying that this is what drugs do. They start out and sound like a great time. They end with abhorrent behavior, violation of dignity, and the utter destruction of people down to discardable and replaceable playthings. They diminish your self-worth and self-control. They turn you into a thing, toy, or a monster. From true pleasurable and enjoyable orgies to Caligula's Murder and Mayhem Emporium. From just having a good time, you wake up feeling cheap, used, and trash.

You lose yourself.

Jason here very probably never ever knew he was being laced. A lot of young men and women were being predated upon by older men and women back then. Doesn't matter if it's coke or space coke, don't do drugs. And if you do drugs, be frank and upfront with yourself that you accept the risks and consequences of your actions.

Like have you HEARD Mook?!?

GOD, HE COULD HAVE BEEN GREAT!