#thatjessjohnson

Being a Compilation of the Sort of Self-Celebration that has Many Individuals Shaking their Heads in Disdain, or

I Couldn’t Narrow it Down Any Further Because I’m So Goddamn Precious: An Adventure in Six Eight Parts.

this is the story of you and me…

professorfangirl gave me the lightless ocean where only monsters, and those who feed on monsters, live; she gave me does on my natal day. she saw the sort of me i want to be in lines others wrote. she read to me in my low moments, read to me in my high. once upon a time, she called me a poet. i never knew it about myself until that moment.

small things make my eyes wide, my heart swell. once upon a time, risilovesink knocked on my blog door with something of mine married to something of hers in her little, lovely hands; and she took hold of me; and she’s never since let me go.

once upon a many times, i despaired. i dreaded. i had an all around horrid day. and storyqdayx5d? she rewrote it for me. popped it in the aether and sent it my way. made me smile, clutch my phone to my chest, and smile harder. 

thatjessjohnson laid some stories in my mouth as i slept. once upon a time, i knotted them about themselves like cherry stems, and i gave them back to her; and in return, she gave me the company of wolves, and myself as i wished to be when i was too small to know that my wants were impossible.

and anyone who dared pass me without caution would feel the wrath and work of me clinging to them, clouding their vision, crawling their skin—and every cheek i touched would echo, pollen blessed, with shades of umber and orange and nox—and i could pull strands of ichor from my sides and pass them on and feel the tug of every red thread through my loves’ dangers—and when i died, died, there would be nothing left but loam, and stories racing into the shoots of a hundred cypress knees.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

okay, so NOT ONLY do you know these bad boys out of the park, but they're so good that all of a sudden EVERYONE in the book industry is like HEY THATJESSJOHNSON!!! DO YOU WANT TO LIKE, ILLUSTRATE THE COVER OF MY BOOK AND ALSO WE'RE MAKING IT A MOVIE, MAYBE YOU COULD DO THE MAKEUP?, and you're like golly gee gosh!!!! okay!!!!! so you do it and you win an academy award for best makeup and everyone is like HOLY SHIT, thatjessjohnson and her tiny studio are like, creative geniuses, let's hire them to do everything for us, always.

thatjessjohnson!!!! you are SWIMMING IN MONEY. your studio can expand!!! your creative verve has never been higher or brighter!!!! you are on Time's list of Most Influential!!!!! YOU GET INVITED TO TOM HANKS' BIRTHDAY PARTY, WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY THE COOLEST CELEBRITY BIRTHDAY PARTY YOU COULD POSSIBLY GET INVITED TO.

i haven't read them, but by god that sounds JUST UP MY ALLEY. thank you so much for the rec!!! i'll see if i can track down a copy. 

AREN'T THEY BOTH SO GOOD, JESUS CHRIST.

(i just finished a biography of jacques plante by todd denault, who wrote the greatest game and OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD, IT WAS SO GOOD, THATJESSJOHNSON IT WAS SO SO SO SO GOOD.) i'm going to make another reclist pretty soon, i just want to read a few more so it's a bit meatier.

anyway, like i said, thank you so much for the rec! i'm really excited to track them down and read them.

American Gods, Neil Gaiman

The Once and Future King, T.H. White

Howl's Moving Castle, Diane Wynne Jones

Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

The Dresden Files, Jim Butcher cheating

His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman cheating

Good Omens, Neil Gaiman and Terry Prachett

John Dies at the End, David Wong

Me Talk Pretty One Day, David Sedaris

Which Witch?, Eva Ibbotson

I HAVE TO ADD ONE MORE. Stardust, Neil Gaiman

uhhhh The Last Unicorn, Peter S. Beagle

THE SPARROW, Mary Doria Russell

i ended up with 13, haaa

i was tagged by thatjessjohnson and i'm going to tag some people in the tags!

I’d ask, “What Martin Freeman thing,” but I just remembered what website I’m on and how likely it is there’s no logic to be found if I knew anyway.