#telodije

Give her insecurities, make her feel like she's being too much or too little. Make her believe she is insane for being suspicious, for questioning you. Go on. How long do you think she'll last enduring that? How long do you think is gonna take for her to remember what she's worth, for her to realize none of that is worth it nor enough for her.

She wants to believe in you, but when she eventually keeps up with you and all your lies, she won’t hesitate and be gone from your reach for good.

And you may find afterwards, something entertaining -for a while- something half exciting -for a while-, something less “difficult”, “complicated”, and of course, you'd also never agree on that, but less “meaningful” too, less “caring”, pretentious.

Cause she was a bold lover. She was a giver, she was understanding, she encouraged you to fulfill your dreams, she would also buy things for you without you asking her, because she knew those things could help you with your projects, she committed, she prayed for you, she prayed for your family. She made you laugh, she would make breakfast for you with special notes. She continuously prepared herself with knowledge, readings, practice, to be complete herself, empowered herself, responsible for her emotions and feelings. She was independent, and brave, and successful. She was sexy, she was daring, and loving and caring, and funny, and always tried to make something special for the two of you every day. She threw you parties with decoration and your favorite meal, to celebrate your achievements, your birthday, your anniversaries. Without you asking her.

Being and doing all that, she was loyal and true. She chose you everyday to deliver that to you as her couple. You and only to you. She left out any other “extra male” wanting her, and never made you aware of the many men interested in her affections, because they were all irrelevant for her. And she never allowed anything to jeopardize her relationship to you. She never put herself in a position of risk, where she could hurt you or loose you. She was a loyal and faithful partner.

Therefore. You'll always feel her abscense, because she filled voids you didn’t know you had, she loved you in places you weren’t aware of, of yourself.

That much lucky you were.

So afterwards, when she's gone from your life. Every single time things end up mediocre for you with those other girls, you'll wish, you had been the better person. You'll regret having put at risk all that. You'll see how much of a yerk you were. And you'll find yourself longing for her. Longing for that kind of love you didn’t know how to receive and nurture.