#tarotwips

The Pressure OC boutta go crazy (same oc shipped with Sebastian btw)

Rmking my Pressure oc AGAIN cause ouhm it was a bit buns.. so take a Guinevere (YES I gave her name back)

story time ig but not really? I got hit with the extreme urge to just kill myself. Why? Shit happening, nothing to me but jut feeling like I fucked up and then it became "everyone actually wants me dead" (I think someone actually thought I was about to which I was really close to) so uhm. Trying to distract myself now with fixing my art style cause that's another reason I wanted to go out with a bang; I hate my art. Its not great to me and I want a style that makes ppl drool (and not in a "I think you'd bang on "the green site" with how hot your art is" way)

Struggling with BPD and a family that believes mental health isn't a real thing sucks. It really is, I've struggled since I was little on TOP of hypersexuality.. plus csa/cocsa that never got taken seriously.

It feels great spiraling so horrifically bad that you feel like an abuser. I cant even tell if I'm not, I wanna give myself credit n' all saying "Yeah I am a good person people love me!" but feeling like you do more harm than good topples that

I'm trying. I'm trying to get better without the meds I use to be on (forcibly taken off them by said family), trying to recover without a therapist cause money can only buy happiness, I'm getting there. Things are gonna get better

I can give myself props cause I got a job! I got a job and I think this one is better for me because this one only has women, literally this work only wanted women and I only found out because my bother applied there.. his sister (me) got it and I have onboarding today!

There's not really a point to this ramble, I guess I wanted to write it out without it being to anyone necessarily which is nice cause at least I'm not actively throwing my "woe is me!" onto one human, no one is gonna see this anyways so

I'm just happy I got a job, when I get money I'll make more quality content cause this PC is falling apart. I'm gonna get an Ipad (and/or PC), I'm gonna busy myself with the fast food industry an after come home and make art of my stupid OC x Canon, I've been fancying Sebastian an Guinevere together lately- funny how the small things can make you feel better

Sometimes I wish I'd have just committed, but other times I wake up, do something an I'm just happy to have gotten a chance to draw my favorite things again My art is slop and will never be good enough, but its my slop so I have that lmao

Fraise Bailey-Créam!

ALT. Look !