#studywithnate

Finals are a final exam, a test. Not a final verdict on knowledge or talent or promise or worth.

Study hard, do your best. But also congratulate yourself for getting this far, for all the hard work you have done to get to this point.

Before you give up, break down, or do anything drastic, please consider doing something unexpected in a positive way.

Go on that day trip, say yes to something you've been putting off, make that phone call to the person you haven't talked to in a while, jump into a new hobby, go to that new place for dinner.

I spent about half an hour crying about it. Then I just got back to work.

My new friends taught me that, especially as a neurodivergent person, I cannot accept the narrative I've been told: that I am not too much or too little, but exactly who I need to be.

I knew that I had set myself up for a challenging couple of months, balancing twenty credits, an internship, and both my school and home lives. I had hoped, however, that I would be able to settle down and focus on school.

Of course, when you need some calm, you're never going to get it. Within the first two weeks of the semester, I had a friend experience some violent homophobia near campus and received the news that my grandmother had entered hospice care. On top of that, I have been struggling with my mental health, trying to manage my ADHD, OCD, and depression in the face of many responsibilities and little sleep.

I have already exhausted my excused absences for the semester and received two reports of academic concern.

However, I am determined not to give up on myself.

I have wonderful friends and family who have been supporting me, reminding me why I do this. I have professors who are genuinely worried about me and advisors to help me reorganize my life. I have a purpose and a dream and a reason for what I do.

I have been seeking support from the different resources around campus to try and address my attendance and poor performance. I reached out to a helpline when the grief and anxiety became too much and I didn't know a way forward. I spend time doing ridiculous things with my friends and just doing nothing. Today I made a move for my health and cleaned the trash out of my room.