#student!geralt

Geralt’s face grew warm, “What do you mean--” He was cut off by Jaskier wrapping a blanket around him, and putting a pillow under his head.

Jaskier grinned as he bounced off the bed and skipped over to his instruments in the corner of the room. He grabbed what looked like a small guitar and plopped onto the bed next to Geralt. “I’ll sing your anxiety away.”

Geralt chuckled, “And how do you propose you will do that?”

Jaskier whispered conspiratorially, “By singing, ‘Old McDoodle’.”

Geralt quirked an eyebrow, “Old McDonald?”

“No, no,” Jaskier shook his head, “‘Old McDoodle’.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s Old McDonald,” Geralt smirked.

Jaskier waved him off, “I would know Geralt. I wrote the song.”

Geralt scoffed, “You wrote Old McDonald?”

Jaskier sighed and shook his head, “No. I wrote ‘Old McDoodle’. Now please Geralt. Don’t interrupt.” He stared at him pointedly, his face serious, but he couldn’t stay serious for long and eventually broke out into a smile as he strummed the first chord.

“Old McDoodle had a farm. Eyo Eyo Why?”

Jaskier looked up from strumming, “I don’t know Geralt. Why does anyone have a farm? That’s not the point.” He continued singing.

“And on that farm he had a…?”

He looked up expectantly, waiting for Geralt to answer.

Geralt shrugged his shoulders, “Um… Cow?”

Jaskier sighed and rolled his eyes, “I said don’t interrupt. Yes. He had a cow. Eyo eyo, why?” He winked and Geralt couldn’t help but giggle. Geralt watched Jaskier’s hands as his fingers expertly plucked at the strings.

“With a--” Jaskier placed his palm against his lips and produced a loud fart noise. Geralt’s eyes widened in surprise as Jaskier continued to sing the verse. Inserting fart noises where Geralt would have expected a ‘moo’.

“Here a- fart noise- there a -fart noise-. Every where a -fart noise-. Having farms is a stinky affair,” Jaskier sighed, shaking his head sadly. “Old McDoodle had a farm, and who the hell knows why!”

Jaskier smiled setting aside his ukulele, “And that’s the song.”

Geralt raised an eyebrow, “He only had the one farm animal then?”

Jaskier nodded, “Ol Jacqueline. Named after his one true love. Lost her in a dairy fire. So he bought a cow and named it after her.” He looked down solemnly.

Geralt snorted, “So, you know why he has a farm.”

Jaskier stared at him incredulously, “Of course Geralt. I wrote the song.”

Geralt chuckled, “Ah, of course.”

Jaskier rested his hand under his chin and stared at Geralt expectantly.

Geralt blushed, “...what is it?”

Jaskier huffed, “Aren’t you going to ask what a dairy fire is?”

“Right,” Geralt smirked, “I was wondering.”

Jaskier continued to stare at him expectantly.

“...what’s a dairy fire?” Geralt asked.

Jaskier beamed, “I’m glad you asked. She ate too much dairy and farted herself to death. Thus why Ol Jacqueline is perfect.”

Geralt laughed at the ridiculousness of the story. He wouldn’t have thought a story like that would have made him laugh so hard. Maybe it was because it was Jaskier telling it. His stomach did feel better. He definitely felt more relaxed. 

A loud fart ripped near the two of them. Geralt blushed as his eyes widened in embarrassment. He had felt a little too relaxed.

Jaskier smirked and patted his arm, “Better out than in. I bet your stomach feels a lot better now.” 

Geralt covered his face in embarrassment, “Yeah… but… I farted in your bed.”

Jaskier laughed and laid across Geralt’s stomach, “I fart in my bed all the time. I don’t mind if you do.”

Geralt peaked out from under his hands, “That’s different. No one wants to smell someone else’s farts.”

Jaskier arched an eyebrow, “Wanna bet?” He lifted up the blanket he had laid over Geralt and covered his head as he trapped himself under the blanket with the fart.

Geralt shrieked in horror as he tried to pull the blanket off him, “Jaskier! Don’t! It probably smells really bad!”

Jaskier sniffed loudly, “Smells great!” Geralt continued to try and wrestle Jaskier out from under the blanket when Mr. Pankratz knocked on the door frame.

Geralt froze, his heart stopping in his chest, “Mr. Pankratz…”

Jaskier stilled then quickly pulled the blanket off his head, “Dad! It’s not what it looks like.”

Mr. Pankratz’s face was mostly serious, but a small smirk formed at the corner of his lips, “Dinner’s ready. Be sure to wash up.”

Jaskier huffed a sigh as his father left. He grumbled, “I wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

Geralt stared at Jaskier in shock, “Why?”

Jaskier shrugged, “I don’t know. More entertaining?”

“Well… he does make you leave the bedroom door open,” Geralt offered.

“That’s true, but…” He leaned in closer, a smirk on his lips, “we could also give him something to worry about.”

Geralt blushed, swallowing the lump in his throat, “...like… what?”

Jaskier opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted.

“I don’t hear you washing your hands,” Mr. Pankratz shouted from the other room.

“Let them alone dear, it’s not like one of them will get pregnant,” Mrs. Pankratz cooed.

There was a grunt and some muffled arguing between the two as Jaskier hopped off the bed. Jaskier smirked and motioned for Geralt to follow, “Come on, let’s go eat.”

Geralt wondered how red his face was as he followed Jaskier out of the room.

~~~

They all sat at the dining room table. Geralt didn’t realize how hungry he was until the delicious scent of the meal wafted in front of his nose. 

Jaskier grinned as he leaned over and whispered to him, “Smells good. Not as good as your farts though.” He winked.

Geralt groaned at Jaskier’s terrible joke and shook his head, “You need to get your olfactory system checked.”

Jaskier raised his eyebrows, “My what system?”

“Your nose,” Geralt chuckled.

Jaskier hummed and piled mashed potatoes on his and Geralt’s respective plates. “Maybe you could check it for me later. We could play doctor. It starts in the mouth, right?”

Geralt’s face must have been beet red, because his dad decided to intervene on his behalf.

“Jaskier, it’s rude to whisper at the dinner table. Why don’t you tell your mother how school was today.”

Jaskier frowned as he grabbed another dish and loaded their plates with it. “It was fine. Nothing to write home about.”

“In a way, that’s what I’m asking you to do anyway. I heard from Principal De Vries that you were disrespectful to the secretary?” Mr. Pankratz raised an eyebrow.

“She was disrespectful first! She was completely rude to Geralt, treating him like some kind of criminal.”

Geralt moved his mashed potatoes around his plate nervously. He wondered if this would be the last straw and they would pull him out of school. He should say something to defend him. “It’s- it’s not his fault sir,” Geralt tried to look at Jaskier’s father, but couldn’t manage it. He continued anyway, “I um, am not very good with words… and… well… Jaskier was only sticking up for me… please don’t take him out of school.”

Mrs. Pankratz frowned as she gently smacked her husband on the arm, “Look what you did. You scared the poor boy with your grumbly glare. He thinks you're mad at Julian.”

Mr. Pankratz frowned, “I’m not--.” He sighed and softened his features as he turned to Geralt. “I’m not going to take him out of school. Where did you get that idea?”

After a moment the three of them all turned toward Jaskier. Jaskier’s gaze shifted away as he grabbed the mashed potatoes again, “Um… more potatoes Geralt?”

Geralt didn’t protest as more was stacked on top of the already high mound on his plate.

Mr. Pankratz sighed, “Jaskier, we talked about over embellishing your stories.”

Jaskier pouted, “I know… I’m sorry.” He turned to Geralt and grabbed his hand, holding it between his, “I didn’t realize you would take my over exaggeration seriously. I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?”

Geralt blushed and nodded his head. Gazing into those perfect blue eyes, he wasn’t sure how he couldn’t. 

Jaskier beamed, “Wonderful! Problem solved.”

“Not exactly.”

Jaskier grimaced. He was hoping they had forgotten.

“It seems like you know how to apologize. So first thing tomorrow morning you can apologize to the school secretary.”

Jaskier groaned and laid his head dramatically on Geralt’s shoulder, “But dad… she was so mean to Geralt.”

“Someone else’s rude behavior does not constitute rude behaviour back. I’m not her parent, but I am yours. So I expect you to do the right thing.”

Mrs. Pankratz smiled reassuringly, “I know it’s hard honey, but it’s our duty as your parents to instill in you good values. When you’re an adult you can choose to leave them at the door and be as rude to as many assholes as you like.”

Mr. Pankratz growled, “Lilia…”

She smiled and booped him on the nose, “Yes Alfred dear?”

He sighed and shook his head, “Nevermind… let’s eat.”

Geralt tried to hide his smirk as he watched the dynamic of Jaskier’s family. It seemed Mr. Pankratz had his hands full, but luckily he didn’t seem to mind.

~~~

After dinner, Jaskier and Geralt helped clean off the table. His father informed them he would be driving Geralt home.

Mrs. Pankratz pouted, “I was going to take our guest home. I wanted to know all about him and Julian.”

“Which is why I’m doing it. To spare our guest your numerous questions,” Mr. Pankratz grinned and planted a kiss on her forehead.

She gasped in protest, “Traitor! You should want to know! For our son’s well-being! He could die single and alone!”

“Nothing wrong with being single, but I don’t think we have to worry about him dying alone.” He turned to Geralt and Jaskier, “Thank you boys for your help. Go pack up your things so we can head on out. Don’t want to keep your mother waiting.”

Jaskier nodded and pulled Geralt along back to his bedroom. He bounced onto his bed as he watched Geralt pack up his school supplies. “Your mom always work this late?”

Geralt nodded, zipping up his backpack, “Usually. She works the night shift.”

Jaskier rolled onto his stomach and kicked his legs back and forth, “Maybe we could have a sleep over sometime? Watch movies, and stay up late.”

Geralt smiled, “...that would be fun.”

“Great!” Jaskier jumped up, “I’ll tell my dad to ask your mom and they can set up a time.” He grabbed Geralt’s hand and dragged him back out to the living room.

“Got everything?” Jaskier’s dad asked.

Jaskier nodded, interlacing his fingers with Geralt’s, “Yup!”

Geralt stared at his feet, his cheeks feeling warm. He gently squeezed Jaskier’s hand back.

Mrs. Pankratz was sitting on the couch brooding, “Have a safe trip…”

Mr. Pankratz kissed her on the head as he walked by, “See you when we get back.”

She glared at him, “Not if I see you first!” He arched an eyebrow at her.

Jaskier rolled his eyes, “Bye mom, see you in a bit.”

They piled into the car. Jaskier let go of Geralt’s hand as they crawled in, but immediately grabbed it again when they had buckled up and settled. 

“Hey dad, Geralt had the great idea that we should have a sleep over the next time his mom works late,” Jaskier beamed.

“Did he now?” Mr. Pankratz glanced back at them using the rear view mirror. “I’ll talk to his mother and see what she says.”

Geralt fidgeted nervously under his gaze. He wondered if he should come clean and say it was Jaskier’s idea, but considering their dynamic his father probably already knew.

Jaskier gazed at their entwined fingers, caressing Geralt’s finger tips with his free hand, “Your finger nails are so beautiful.”

“They’re just finger nails…” Geralt mumbled.

Jaskier shook his head adamantly, his brunette locks swaying with the force, “Not just any. They’re yours, and everything about you is gorgeous.” He smiled and rested his head on his shoulder.

Geralt’s heart pounded in his chest. He didn’t know what to say, how to react. Jaskier didn’t seem to mind, so he sat quietly until they reached his house.

Geralt’s mom waved at them as they pulled up. She smiled at Geralt as he walked up and hugged her.

“Have a good time?” 

He nodded as she smoothed down his long white hair.

“I’m glad.”

Jaskier leaned out the window as he waved goodbye, “See you tomorrow at school!”

Geralt waved back as they pulled out of the driveway. He couldn’t wait.

~~~

A/N: Sorry for the long delay. I didn’t mean for this update to take as long as it did, but such is life. Let me know if you want me to remove or add you to the tag list! If your name isn’t underlined it’s because something in your settings is preventing me from tagging you. So if you want to be notified by tumblr check your settings. :)