Ok first thing that came to mind for your microfic prompts request (so sorry if it’s garbage): Hurt/Comfort where the hurt is almost nothing, like stubbing a toe or getting a splinter, but it is the last straw and pushes character A completely over the edge, so character B has to comfort while trying desperately not to laugh or take the piss.
@harrie-leithillustration in no way are these garbage prompts! I love them and thank you for sending them to me!
Simon Snow, You Are So Very Good: A Microfic
I think it’s to my credit that when I walk in and Simon bursts into tears, I don’t immediately take it personally. Healthy communication and years of experience have helped us both make a lot of progress.
Instead, I drop my bag and put my arms around him. “What’s wrong, love?”
“Baz, I don’t want to murder a family!”
“That seems reasonable. Who wants you to murder a family?”
“Well, loads of people would.”
“Why don’t you start from the beginning?”
He sniffles and holds me tighter. “Well, I wanted to start dinner for you because I got off work early. And the recipe called for saffron which I always skip but I love you and I know you like fancy things like bits that cost a tenner for a tiny jar, so I decided to run to the shop. But that meant I had to change out of my pajamas which I had put on when I got home. And when I was changing I saw the laundry in the corner, which I’ve been meaning to fold for ages, and I thought I should fold a few things since I needed trousers anyway. But then when I put a shirt away I was by the dresser and I realized it had been raining in because I left the window open this morning and I know you hate it when I leave the window open—”
“For heavens sake Snow, that argument is from fifth year—“
“Exactly, you’ve always hated it, and this time the rain warped the wood on that nice dresser Gran gave us, and I ran for a towel to wipe it up and then Spadey knocked over your potted plant, because he got so nervous and was trying to help—“
Here the tail in question wrapped itself tightly around my leg and I gave it a reassuring squeeze.
“—so I knew I had to clean that up too, but I forgot all the towels were in the wash which I was supposed to be folding but while I was looking for them in the cabinet I found signs of a mouse, well I think it’s a mouse, I suppose it could be a Beatle or maybe a Pill Bug? But I hope not, magickal bugs like that don’t really live in the cities, but anyway, I think there might be a mouse—“
“Snow—“
“—and that’s probably my fault too because sometimes I eat biscuits in bed—“
“Snow—“
“—even though you tell me I shouldn’t and even though you eat them too but still it’s always my idea, and I suppose we have to call the exterminator—“
“Snow—“
“—but what if it’s cute???? And it has a mouse family and we murder it???”
I love Simon Snow. Always have. It’s the only reason I’m able to hold myself together for this.
“I didn’t even start dinner! I never even got the saffron! I really wanted to treat you to *all* the ingredients.”
“Love.”
“I don’t want to kill anything else,” he tells me, his eyes big and wet, and I’m suddenly so very glad I never laughed. I hold him close until he’s stopped crying.
“Simon Snow, you are so very good,” I whisper into his curls. “We’ll figure it out together.”
Later, as I hit submit on orders for:
Humane mouse traps
Takeaway Nandos
More towels
Furniture wax
A dust buster for the bedroom
I think to myself, I’m living a charmed life.













