#soux

i don't feel bad in knowing i wouldn't feel bad if he died. wouldn't care. wouldn't cry. i know on the outside you are saying, "oh, no, you don't really mean that. people make mistakes but it's all so petty and small when you're talking about human life it's a beautiful thing it's a miracle" but do you really think so? of all the six or seven billion - i don't know, it keeps growing too damn much - people out there is it really worth that much? nature and it's lifeforms are supposed to be defined by something structural, understandable; it sure would be something if natural selection ever worked its way through the human race, picking and plucking out the warped and the wounded to something like godspeed. and if there is a god, do you think he is happy? i always find it funny when the bible-pushers shove the thing up your noses and claim that you're some pretty child of god but only if you believe in him so what about everyone who doesn't? we're all damned, you know, in some way, whether you believe you are or not. and there just too damn many of us! so like i was saying it really wouldn't be a loss if we lost him and good riddance! and maybe i am sick sick sick but honey you are just as well, look at the world through an hourglass of pill bottles and loose change and you'll get it. i can't believe how corrupt this has become, how a child can grow up thinking that there is something wrong with you if you don't have everything at the beckoning of your fingertips. could it be as sad as that? how easier to pretend that this is the only small space you'll ever know, ever should know, will ever want to know because who needs space to stretch and sprawl? crawl into the quietest corners of your self and condemn every body you know