#sorta important

Hi yall! Seems that recently ive been mass reported under a fake premise by a bunch a people, and MIGHT get deactivated or whatever. If I do mysteriously disappear ye it’s probably from that, just a quick heads up for yall (SPECIALLY MY MOOTS! @aidenlovescoffeeee, @plantiestpot @alaskinapples99 @kerosnes (we ain’t moots but just in case ya wanted ta know!)) sorry in advance I hope this is just a fake warnin-

ik I haven't updated it yet this month, but I'm actually not sure if I'm even going to at this point. the month is going to be over fairly soon and I've tried to work on the next chapter some more but my motivation has gone down the drain, especially this week. I haven't felt motivated to do much of anything this week, actually :') (idk if it's just burnout from having just finished the semester not too long ago or something else, but yeah. that's where I'm at)

I was going to put it on hiatus next month anyway since I'm participating in whumpuary and that's where a lot of my focus is going to be, but I'm potentially going to start its hiatus a bit early

I know a lot of you enjoy the fic and I didn't want to make the hiatus longer than it was already going to be. but as I said, the motivation is just not there rn. I'm trying to finish up my whumpuary fics plus a buttonblossom Christmas oneshot, so that's where my priorities have been as of late. and I don't want to rush this chapter and have it turn out half-baked just to get it done by a certain time, you know? it's a chapter that I've been excited to write, and I want to take the time to write it well

figured i should tell y'all this

i'm trans(masc)

also nonbinary

If an oral medication is not available in some format which can at least be safely/effectively crushed or opened up and dissolved in some liquid? (However disgustingly, I might add. 🙄) I just haven't been able to take it. So this was a bigger deal than you might expect.

Based on a little food experimentation since the latest dilation treatment earlier in the week, I decided it was worth risking one of these teeny little horrors whole:

(Hand for scale.)

They're film coated for a reason, yeah. 😬 Those fuckers are not only bitter, they are very well known for making your mouth numb and tingly if you so much as cut them in half--never mind needing to crush them up and swill them in water. It feels horribly weird, and pretty much totally kills my sense of taste for hours--except for its own lingering bitterness! Even trying to take the crap like an hour before bed (about how long I can stay awake afterwards), that's not too pleasant.

So yeah, I was extra glad that at least smooth things that size can make it down without blocking up my throat now! Besides the general relief, because this is the best it's been basically since the scarring started setting in.

More important with, you know, actual food and the like. But I am also relieved at the prospect of maybe not needing overall pretty gross liquid medications from now on. That was hard enough to take when I was a kid, and needing one hell of a lot less of the stuff on a less regular basis!

(Also, I am freshly pissed off at the not-so-benign neglect passing for treatment through the NHS--while persistently acting like that is some great act of charity you should act suitably grateful for. And they really want you out of the system's hair, one way or another. Funny how much more favorable the results can be when the institutional approach is...not like that. 😑 And it's not just me with experiences like this. That's the super frustrating and depressing part. But, trying not to get started right now.)