#song!

I’ve got a sick obsession more like a sick obligation, I keep repossession’ more like keep contemplatin’ What went wrong inside - where did I put my mind? Why am I not cryin’ I don’t deserve to cry, I’m sorry I’m this and you don’t have to forgive

But you’ve always held me, Arms wrapped so tenderly Even as I reach around you To stab right through Your skin and ribs My knife digging in To your heart

And it’s not your fault, Sunny Please don’t ever mourn me Please know I’m sorry It isn’t worth anything

Why am I not cryin’ I don’t deserve to cry, I’m sorry I’m this Please just forget Or maybe don’t forget Please don’t remember Not in September But don’t let me die In the corners of your mind

Is that selfish? I know I’m selfish. Kill me in your mind, too, If that makes it easier on you.

A vary bombastic title, for a post I am sure is to be somewhat incoherent and wildly inaccurate, but please bear with me (and listen to the song in the link!).

The HP universe (and arguably, ours) is clearly deterministic in some sense, since the existence of prophecies and time turners assumes this. So, we must accept that there's such a thing as Fate, even if "our choices show what we truly are." (Dumbledore seems of the mind that character is destiny, and I agree).

This, Fate, is something Tom Riddle had rebelled against as soon as he found out he was a wizard if not before, in his denial that everyone - even wizards - must die.

The rebellion against death extended to thinking he could even use death as a tool for his own ends in making Horcruxes, using Inferi, and… Imma just assume, being liberal with threats of murder and publicly using murder to make a point.

Then, when the prophecy came, he rebelled against it too (or maybe he thought Destiny had singled him out to win by giving him fair warning), by setting out to murder an infant. Not to give him too much credit for this, but on his way to do it, he did resist the urge to kill a Muggle child, so I can't imagine he had slaughtered defenseless babies left and right for the hell of it. At least, not too much.

And thus, the absolutely ordinary baby got a Fate of his own and became the chosen one.

The importance of choosing what had been decided is discussed in HBP, and Harry is proud that he understands it. It’s committing to and choosing the fait accompli that turns it all around,  and Voldemort loses repeatedly for his failure to understand this. He uses and punishes others instead of looking inward and understanding some things are beyond his power, and that it might even be a good thing. He uses his own people as human shields and they lie to him; quite possibly, in murdering Severus in front of Harry he had done the only thing that could make Harry want to see what Dumbledore’s killer (and his parents’ killer, in his mind) had to say. And Harry makes the only choice available to him, fully understanding the consequences.

And then we have the man who chose to live the worst version of his life, and then chose death when he could have saved himself, the opposite of what nearly anyone - but especially Voldemort - would have done. He wasn't a human shield, he was a willing protector. The man walked on a razor’s edge for his entire adult life, always plausibly good or plausibly bad to outsiders, but fully cognizant of the truth internally.

Severus had once unwittingly condemned his only friend to death and then was forced to pull the trigger on his other only friend, in a horrifying variation on the theme. Eternal Recurrence, anyone?

But… you have to mean the Unforgivables, or they don't work. You have to mean it, or it has no meaning. Ultimately, no one could force Severus to do anything. He recognized his own wrong choices and he chose every step of the way to make amends.

“Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.” - Shakespeare, because why wouldn't I invite the comparison :eyeroll:

I’ll argue that Tom was born great and that Harry had greatness thrust upon him – and Severus was all three.

I like to think that he lived up to the Nietzschean ethos of Amor Fati - never delusional about his reality or his prospects, and all the same, he lived his life by his values and embraced the consequences. What a stark contrast with Voldemort, who seemed so desperate to style himself as a Nietzschean Uber-mensch, striving and not realizing that denial of reality, selfishness, and abject cruelty are not the hallmarks of great figures but of children.

Voldemort constantly demands recognition and service from others, like a child, unknowingly living out his trauma of infant abandonment in the process of being revived by Peter Pettigrew. He lacks self-awareness and reflection to the point that you have to wonder how free he ever was. Severus is a servant, and constantly referred to as such. As Voldemort’s true servant, he gets the plot going – but from the moment he makes a genuine choice and is no longer merely a vehicle or vessel, he succeeds and ascends his “servant” status (think "Dumbledore's pet" versus Dumbledore's man"). I love the idea that Voldemort died thinking Severus’s last words were “My Lord,” when in truth they were a request to be viewed as who he was.

And the last memory he gave ended with: Don't worry. I have a plan.

This exemplifies that choice and duty are absolutely not opposed.

To make up to you for this post, here’s a beautiful song that I think conveys the message well.

uhhh

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of pain and anger. Unexplained anger and ship being violently pushed and tossed around by water.

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Astrea shivered as she fell to the ground. Her body hurt and she felt like she was fading. Her panic increased as she stared at her hand. Hala had to accept her weapon. She was terrified when she felt a reassuring hand on her back.

"Astrea! Are you alright?" Tide inquired, clearly concerned. Astrea's body jolted her, and she gasped in agony as a coughing fit erupted. In order to comfort her, they drew her close and petted her hair. As her body's pain subsided, she rested on their chest. She knew she wouldn't fade right away, but she had no idea when she would. She was so scared.

"I'm... I'm okay." Astrea's voice trembled as they looked her over. This felt so familiar, but she didn't dare say so. She wanted to comfort herself, she had to. "Cruel and cold like winds on the seas... Will you ever return to me?" Astrea's trembling voice sang as her panic gently began to calm. "Hear my voice sing with the tide~... My love will never die..." Astrea's voice gently sang. Tide felt their heart pick up and they felt concerned by the fear in her voice.

"Over waves and deep in the blue... I will give up my heart for you~..." Astrea finished as her voice smoothed out. "Ten long years I'll wait to go by~... My love will never die..." Astrea finished. They could hear her voice tremble more. The water began to move faster and fiercer as a response to their growing anger, yet they didn't know why they were angry.

"Come, my love, be one with the sea! Rule with me for eternity." Tide performed a duet. Kioko stumbled and brushed up against the railing. As the water grew fiercer and angrier, Hound placed his hand firmly on the wall.

"What the Hell-!" As he clung to the wall, Ebony snapped. The boat was moving very quickly through the water. Dahlia lowered herself and held her daughter in place as the ground shook. Gaster and W.D. were using magic to keep each member and person grounded.

"Drown all dreams so mercilessly! And leave their souls to me..." As they shifted Astrea, Tide sang. Astrea's magic glowed and crackled. Tide knew it wasn't a good sign. "Play the song you sang long ago! And wherever the storm may blow..." Tide sang as the water shook the boat and moved faster. The spirits were unaffected, but Hina clung to Jasper as he used magic to keep them from falling. "You will find the key to my heart! We'll never be apart." Tide sang, and Astrea found solace in it. Her magic sparked, causing her to hiss in pain, and she rested her head on their chest.

"Wild and strong you can't be contained! Never bound nor ever chained." Astrea and Tide sang together as the boat shook and a wave hit it. "Wounds you caused will never mend! And you will never end..." As the boat shook, the two sang in unison. It gradually calmed down as Astrea's pain and magic subsided. Astrea was no longer in a lot of pain.

"Cruel and cold like winds on the seas... Will you ever return to me?" Tide and Astrea carefully sang together. Astrea shifted a little as she heard the passengers on the ship start to wonder what had happened. "Hear my voice sing with the tide... Our love will never die~..." Tide and Astrea finished. Astrea was exhausted and closed her eyes. Tide picked her up and pulled her away from the area so she could rest. Tide began to wonder why their SOUL hurt when they saw Astrea in pain.

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@okay-kioko @kiokodoodles Hehehe~.

Song Covers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3R0TXxhTHVo&ab_channel=Myriani

you're so perfect and amazing and talented and- wait--

you don't s'pose i could cop a love letter from either one of the potter bois...

i love reggie but i've always been a simp for james and harry JAJSJDJDJ

:O of course baby