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I looked down at my hands and feet, seeing that my suspicions had been confirmed. Sighing in frustration, I sat beside my physical body, unaware of how to return to my physical state.
What had once been a body and clothing full of color had now been replaced by a transparent blue reminiscent of Iroh's stories he had once told me of his journey in the Spirit World.
I never thought I would discover the day when I would be trapped; utterly useless in my own fate and destiny, left to the devices of what the universe decides for me.
Glancing back over to my physical body, I frown in thought. Shadows had been etched beneath my eyes, and a permanent frown had graced my features; no doubt from the stress of the past three years.
The past three years have shaped me into who I am now, yet it seems I still cannot let go of who I used to be.
And despite what I felt he had done to me, I could not let go of what I had done to Prince Zuko.
Suddenly, the door to my room opened, surprising me with the presence of Iroh and Zuko himself.
"Sumi, it's time for us to get ready. I've gotten a lead on the Avatar," the banished prince let out as he made himself comfortable in my room. While leaning on the wall next to my bed frame, he continued to look on in frustration at me when I didn't respond.
I mean, can you blame me? Communicating across from the Spirit World isn't the easiest thing to do for a sixteen-year-old girl.
"Sumi! You can't keep ignoring me forever. Stop with your meditating and get up."
"Relax, Prince Zuko," Iroh interrupted his nephew's outburst by placing a calming hand on Zuko's shoulder. I had to raise my eyebrows in amusement at how easy it was to get on Zuko's nerves, even when I wasn't in the same realm as him.
"She must have just fallen asleep, let us leave her in peace. We'll get her when we arrive at our destination."
Rather than responding, Zuko huffed as he stormed off in annoyance.
"Well, I might as well follow them," I muttered to myself as I stood back up from my place on the ground. Brushing myself off, I moved to follow Iroh out the door. As I did so, I could have sworn I saw the slightest wink come from the retired general, making me stop in my tracks briefly to double-take at the man's actions.
"I must be going crazy," I muttered to myself, following the two out of the door, "I mean, first I'm in the Spirit World, then I start seeing things, and now I'm talking to myself!"
"Next thing I know, I'm going to be told that I'm the Avatar," I pouted as I reached the bow of the deck where Iroh and Zuko resided.
Crossing my arms, I casually rested my back against the railing of the ship, leaning beside where Iroh stood. As I rested my eyes, the feeling of a force passing through me caused me to rise from my rest.
Unfortunately for me, Zuko had walked right through me.
"Rude much." I glowered once more at the prince.
"Uncle, we have to sail faster if we are to catch the Avatar," Zuko commanded Iroh, while Iroh smiled brightly at his nephew.
I swear I'll never understand how Iroh can be so positive all the time.
"Patience, nephew, with time and patience, the mulberry leaf becomes a silk gown."
I chuckled as Zuko scolded his uncle for yet another one of his confusing proverbs.
Of course, Iroh was right, which is why I knew that I, too, would have to wait to find my escape from the Spirit World.
As I tuned out the conversation between the two royals, I turned my head once more to face the majestic dragon that had been plaguing my every waking moment.
Though its color was distorted by its presence in the Spirit World, it seemed that every scale and insignificant detail shone through in all its glory.
Still, in awe at the magnificent creature which had seated itself before me, it lowered its head downward, low enough for me to climb on.
I, too, lowered myself, looking once more into the eyes of the extinct marvelous creature before me, "Are you wanting to take me somewhere?"
It was the warm look in the creature's eyes that told me yes.
With one last look at Zuko and Iroh, I mounted atop the dragon before it suddenly took off at speeds I would have never deemed possible. I struggled to hold on, desperate not to fall into the depths of the ocean below.
"Hey, buddy, do you know if it's possible to die in the Spirit World?" I exclaimed over the roar of the winds whipping around me, throwing my hair around wildly in the wind.
I only got an almost laugh-like roar in response before the dragon flew even faster,
As our journey continued, I saw we were approaching an island filled with ash, atop it resided two sister volcanoes in all their glory.
Before I knew it, the dragon had settled us atop the smaller of the two, nestling itself in a crook below the crater of the volcano.
Despite everything inside me that told me not to go closer to the edge of the volcano, there was another opposing force that once again filled me with a sense of familiarity and comfort that seemed to be coming from the island.
Something that told me to go further.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you, young one."
Turning around in surprise, I quickly performed the movements to shoot a spout of flames out of my hands at the intruder; however, my flames never came.
"Bending doesn't work in this realm, I'm afraid," the man who had startled me said. Now facing him, I was able to take in his red robes and long white hair. But what caught my attention the most was the headpiece which adorned his aged locks, one not unfamiliar to me. One that I had seen in portraits in the royal palace.
"Avatar Roku," I gasped before bowing quickly, "I am so sorry for trying to hurt you. Please forgive me, Avatar."
A chuckle startled me from my frantic state as I stared upward toward the previous Avatar.
"There is no need to worry, young one; it is my fault for startling you by bringing you here."
"So," I said, straightening myself up completely, crossing my arms, "you're the one who brought me to the Spirit World and sent the dragon after me?"
"Yes and no," he said calmly.
"Could you be more vague?" I raised my eyebrow in question as I stared him down.
Chuckling once more, the Avatar continued, "Just let me explain why I've brought you here, and everything will make sense in due time, dear Sumi."
"You see, one hundred years ago, the Avatar disappeared off the face of our world, trapping himself in the depths of the ocean where no one was able to find him. Not until a couple of weeks ago, at least. However, a lot can happen in one hundred years, and the spirit of Raava herself was unsure if the Avatar would be able to fulfill his responsibility by himself if he were to ever wake up."
"Okay, I'm sorry to interrupt, Mr. Avatar sir, but this sounds a bit too much like Avatar business to have anything to do with me," I interrupted, not understanding exactly where Roku was going with his long spiel.
"Trust me, young one, it has much more to deal with than you could have ever imagined. Tell me, have you ever heard of the legend of the Phoenix?"
I nodded my head, "Of course, it's in almost every mythology book. A bird who bursts into flames at the end of his life, only to be reborn from his own ashes."
"That is only the beginning, Sumi," Avatar Roku stepped closer to the volcano, his eyes searching its depths, "The Phoenix as you and so many others know it is only a glimpse into who you used to be-"
"I apologize, I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me start from the beginning. Since the time of the first Avatar, we have been tasked with keeping the balance between the Water Tribes, the Earth Kingdom, the Fire Nation, and the Air Nomads. Only the Avatar could be the master of all elements. However, Raava, the spirit who has granted us Avatar's power, sought a companion for us. Someone who would be able to aid us in every cycle. This person would become the Phoenix. Reborn alongside every Avatar until the Avatar cycle is broken."
Confusion was evident on my face, "So then, why does no one know of this Phoenix? How did they disappear off the face of the Earth?"
"I fear that is where I owe you an apology, Sumi." Sadness graced Avatar Roku's features. "I have watched you closely as you have grown up, and I fear this is not at all what I wanted for you when I reset the Phoenix cycle."
The Avatar sighed before he continued, "Corruption led my Phoenix astray, and so I wiped your memory, resetting the cycle from scratch. Raava ensured you would be reborn at a time best suited to serve Aang."
My eyes widened in recognition, "So, you mean-"
"Yes, Sumi, you are the Phoenix."
"What do you mean you wiped my memory!" I was starting to get frazzled, the amount of new information overloading my brain.
"Unlike the Avatar cycle, with a new Avatar chosen from a different nation in each lifetime, the Phoenix is reborn from its ashes, just like your myth. I wanted you to be able to experience life again. With a fresh set of eyes and a fresh mind. Never would I have wished for what you have gone through, though Sumi, if I had known-"
"So," I interrupted Roku, "you gave me no choice. Wiped my memories and thought that I would come here with an open mind? How gullible do you think I am?"
"No!" I roared at the Avatar, weeks, no years, of pent-up anger and frustration being let out, "I am tired of all of you disguising your own personal agendas as care and kindness. If you cared, you would have worked with my past life instead of locking her away for good."
"And I agree with you, Sumi," it shocked me, hearing such an earnest apology from the man, "I have regretted my decision almost every day. You are strong, but you never should have endured what you have in this lifetime, and I would do everything in my power to make it better for you if I could."
I scoffed, "Apology accepted, I guess."
Deep down, I appreciated the Avatar's apology. It was hard to accept this new information. But, it was also difficult to be mad at events and a past that I could not remember.
Roku smiled knowingly, "You will slowly remember Sumi. You've already shown small signs of your memory coming back. But, you will soon realize you have been graced with powers far beyond what you have conceived."
"It is up to you to decide your fate. It is up to you to decide if you will join the Avatar in restoring balance to our world."
I had been riding the Avatar's dragon, Fang, for what felt like hours now, my destination near in my sight.
My stomach was churning at the thoughts of the conversation I had with Avatar Roku just hours prior.
I would say that if it weren't for the serious nature of what we had discussed, I might have been excited about meeting him.
Everything would change now.
I only had a matter of days until Zuko found the Avatar again. And then what?
Would I join Aang in a fate that I never had a hand in, or would I aid Zuko to return to a life predestined for me?
Roku had left me with one final bit of information: the Avatar's next whereabouts.
But, would I use it for or against him?
I didn't realize it was possible to feel nauseous in the Spirit World.
Suddenly, Fang mounted the ship, lowering himself so that I could make my way onto the deck of the ship. Before I returned to my quarters, I looked back at Fang once more, resting my hand on the bridge of his snout as he nuzzled into my touch.
A faint smile graced my features as I looked Fang in the eyes, taking in the amber eyes of his, which looked so familiar to me.
"Thank you, Fang, I hope to see you again soon," I whispered, resting my forehead on the bridge of the creature's snout, whilst bringing my hands to hold both sides of the dragon's head.
A simple snort from the dragon is all that graced my ears before Fang was whipped away in the winds, flying back in the direction of Avatar Roku's home.
The march back to my room was a short one, but with every step, I felt the weight in my mind bear heavier.
When I finally return to my body, my translucent spirit finally returns into the confines of my physical form.
I gasp, catching my breath, before standing up from where I had been meditating for hours.
As I stretched my sore muscles, a single thought raced through my mind.
You would think I would be more sore for a ten-thousand-and-sixteen-year-old.
"Hello, General, Prince Zuko," I said, nodding to the two in acknowledgement as I took my place at our dining table.
Zuko glared at me before speaking his mind, "And where have you been exactly?"
"Asleep, for your information," I stated, staring daggers straight back into the Prince's eyes, "and it seems you need some too, Prince Cranky, did you miss nap time or something?"
Before he could respond, a chuckle from Iroh brought us both back to reality.
It seemed the stress from my visit to the Spirit World had not left me yet, but that didn't change the fact that Zuko needs to be put in his place every once in a while.
I snapped my head forward before it could hit the table as I nearly passed out from exhaustion, earning me a glance of concern from Iroh.
"I'm okay," I mouthed to him, as we continued to eat while Zuko talked of his search for the Avatar.
"This was another dead end. How am I to regain my honor if I can't even find the Avatar?" Zuko ranted.
Before I knew what I was doing, the words slipped right out of my mouth, "I might be able to help with that."
My eyes widened in shock, before I covered up my shock with a smirk covering my face, as I turned to face Zuko with the information he wanted.
Who knew? Maybe this could be the way I don't have to pick sides.
Maybe I could just let Zuko and the Avatar deal with their problems on their own.
"Well, I heard a rumor that the winter solstice is approaching soon," I responded to Zuko smoothly, noting his confused expression, "It's the time of year when the Spirit World and our world are in closest proximity to one another. And if I were to guess, he's going to try to contact Avatar Roku."
"And how exactly does that help us?"
My smirk widened as I leaned closer to face Zuko.
"What better place to contact the previous Avatar than the Fire Temple Sanctuary?"
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