#sociophobic

And that just made me so happy. Someone else even said i should become a radio announcer. :)

sociophobic song

I´m an introvert. Always was, will always be. Years ago i was living with a group of other problem children. Even there I didn´t fit in. I never talked much with them. Once they all went on a trip to a lake for a day. I was left in the house. They forgot to tell me. And I didn´t care. I just had no presence. I wanted it to be like that. After that i went back home and to a school where social science was my main subject. I learned a lot about how the human mind works. I found out that I´m sociophobic. I was afraid of others judging me, of talking to them. I also saw it as illness. I tried to fight it. I talked with my classmates. I talked with the teachers. Even with my family. I found strenght in friendships i thought were broken long ago. I was mostly over it the time i graduated. Now i started to study at a university. The other students know me. they reach out to me. I, I finally have a presence. It is still a weird feeling. i still like being alone but i also know the joys of socialising. It is weird, when did this happen. How did it happen? When did I loose my Identity as Sociophobic? I´m afraid because I don´t know anymore what I am. But at the same time, I´m happy. I´m moving forward. I´m afraid and happy.

and when I hate someone, it should be forever, it should be completely .. 

*the monsters in my head*