#slx!

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author's note: thank you to @crownsofesha, @housekonig, @bridgeportbritt, and @simming-in-the-rain for sharing screenshots and headlines with me to fill out the news!

Coverage of the Armorican royal family, week of Nov. 5 - Nov. 11

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ONLINE EXCLUSIVE PRINCE HUGO STEALS THE SHOW! Armorica’s youngest royal tags along on Mom and Dad’s international tour

Image caption: LEFT Prince Hugo bats his baby blues for the camera. RIGHT Prince Hugo and his parents, the Duke and Duchess of Laye, pose for pictures with Crown Prince Leo of Aducia.

Maybe he's born with it, maybe it's babylline! Prince Hugo of Laye, Armorica's littlest royal, charmed the press during his first overseas engagement. The 15-month-old Prince accompanied his parents, the Duke and Duchess of Laye, on their recent visit to the Musée National de Aducia. After posting for pictures, the Layes received a private tour from the museum's royal patron, Crown Prince Leo of Aducia, a longtime friend of the Duke’s.

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Freddy & Esther: more than friends? Prince Freddy denies relationship rumors after flirty red carpet snaps

More than friends? Freddy is denying relationship rumors after paps caught him getting cozy with Lord Esther Seymour (@crownsofesha ). The 23-year-old prince traveled to Esha for the Clarke gala, which he attended with the Marquess of Herefordshire. The two were attending as friends, but a series of cozy red carpet pics have Armoricans wondering if Prince Freddy has finally moved on from his relationship with ex-girlfriend Kelly Farrier.

Prince Freddy was seen with his hand on Lord Esther’s back on the red carpet.

Love at last! The inside scoop on the woman who “transformed” the Party Prince

Plus: Her surprising royal connection

Do we hear wedding bells? Prince Frederick has finally moved on from his wild past, all thanks to his “amazing” romance with Theodosia ‘Theo’ Adams, who was described as “the love of his life” by one of the couple’s close friends.

“They’re very happy together,” said our source. “This new relationship has helped him finally put all of his bad habits and failed relationships behind him. Theo is different than all of his exes, and I think he really appreciates that.”

The pair were reportedly introduced this summer by Freddy’s older sister, Crown Princess Rosalind. Blackwell Palace hasn’t confirmed the relationship, but the two have been seen together all over Breizh since she relocated to the city after finishing her law degree. Theo is currently a first-year associate at Maguire, Maguire, and Rudolph, a prestigious law firm in Armorica’s capital, but she won’t be there long—once she marries Prince Frederick, she’ll join the ranks of Armorica’s working royals.

“Theo has had a huge effect on Freddy,” said one royal insider. “He’s matured a lot since they started seeing each other. The King and the Queen couldn’t be happier.”

Blast from the past! King Andre (then the Crown Prince) with Vanessa Adams-Ellis over 30 years ago.

Of course, Theo is no stranger to the royal life. Her great-grandfather was the Duke of Welf, a title now held by her great uncle. Theo’s mother, the late Vanessa Adams-Ellis, was a close friend of King Andre prior to his ascension to the throne. Even after her mother’s death, Theo remained close to the royals and roomed with Crown Princess Rosalind during their uni days at Britechester.

Freddy’s new royal romance is a fairy tale in the making. How long before we have another wedding announcement from Blackwell Palace?

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Royal Rage! Elise Walks Out

Better places to be? Queen Elise was scheduled to speak at a ribbon-cutting ceremony for a newly-rebuilt library in Breizh on Friday afternoon, but Her Majesty was a no-show. Although she was involved in the years-long reconstruction process, first visiting the worksite two years ago after the old library was destroyed in an electrical fire, she couldn’t be bothered to stay to thank everyone who contributed to the project. According to one source, the Queen was spotted at the library earlier that morning, but she was gone by the time the ceremony started.

Reporters and members of the public were looking forward to hearing her remarks, but apparently, Elise wasn’t looking forward to making them!

Our photographers caught the Queen sneaking away just before 3pm on Friday.

Queen Elise climbs into a black town car outside of the Harrow Public Library.

“I was really disappointed,” said one attendee. “I donated to the [library reconstruction fund], and I’ve been following the fundraising efforts for months. I was so happy to hear the library was going to reopen, and I was really looking forward to hearing the Queen’s speech.”

It’s unclear why Elise ran out on her obligations, but royal insiders say that the entire royal family will be spending the weekend at Morley Cottage, their luxury summer home in Trenton county, approximately 60 kilometers northeast of Brüda on the Isle of Genera.

“It’s ridiculous,” said another attendee. “All of this money and effort was wasted because the Queen wanted to start her vacation early.”

Shame on you, Elise!

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Other Headlines:

Big Brother Exclusive! André comes clean about what really happened in the Jacuzzi and at the afterparty! (feat. André Chevalier by @someone-elsa​)

Completely out of control! Girls, drugs, and parties: inside Prince Frederick’s shocking downward spiral

Also in this issue: A new Armorican Princess?

Puff, puff, prince? It looks like Armorica’s party prince hasn’t learned his lesson after all! Just weeks after the royal family’s crackdown on “unauthorized” pictures of Prince Frederick, sLx! photographers caught Freddy smoking a joint outside of a bar at the tail end of a legendary night of drinking and dancing. This is the latest in a series of scandals for the troubled prince, whose well-documented drug habit first made headlines when he was expelled from Elton Academy, an elite boarding school just north of the Armorican capital.

Rumor has it that Freddy and his entourage went out to celebrate his last night in Brüda, where he’d been hiding from the fallout of his recent legal battles. After a wild night of partying, Freddy stepped out for a smoke break with a new woman, Theo Adams, a recent graduate from UBrite’s prestigious law school.

Prince Frederick sparks up with his new flame, Theo Adams.

It looks like Theo has supplanted 22-year-old Kelly Farrier as the Prince’s main squeeze. Kelly, a graduate student currently enrolled in the library sciences program at Breizh College, was first romantically connected to Prince Frederick in January, although the relationship seems to have cooled significantly in recent months. The Prince and the future librarian were last spotted together in May, and have been conspicuously absent from one another’s social media timelines since early June. Kelly has been silent since their apparent break-up, but it looks like the Party Prince is already on the rebound! Theo is a close friend of the Crown Princess, and the great granddaughter of the late Duke of Welf.

LEFT: Prince Frederick and ex-girlfriend Kelly Farrier smile for the camera in one of the last pictures posted to her personal Simstagram account. RIGHT: The bombshell photograph that revealed Prince Frederick’s affair with former royal aide Pippa McNamara.

“Theo and [Crown Princess Rosalind] were really close,” said a former classmate. “They were roommates because Theo’s mom knew the King. They always acted like they were too good for everyone else. They never socialized or went to parties. I think that Rosalind would probably be pretty happy that her brother is finally hooking up with the ‘right sort’ of woman.”

Indeed, it seems like Freddy has always had a strong preference for the ‘wrong sort’ of woman, from married royal staffers to penniless commoners. Has the high-status, high-earning lawyer really captured the womanizing Party Prince’s heart, or has their burgeoning relationship been arranged by senior royals?

Either way, it must be cold comfort to poor Kelly, cast aside in favor of a blue-blooded royal crony. She might not marry a prince, but she’ll always be a queen in our books!

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Other Headlines:

Big lunch or bundle of joy? Bloating or baby? 7 royal experts weigh in

Oh baby! King Andre’s youngest son, 20-year-old Prince Jacques, was photographed with his longtime girlfriend, Vivienne Meijer, at a market in Breizh’s historical district. Prince Jacques looked fresh and casual in a loose-fitting white henley, but Vivienne was positively glowing in a black skater dress.

The 20-year-old is just as famous for her iconoclastic dress sense as she is for her purple lipstick, but lately, she’s been favoring billowy blouses and swingy skirts. The sudden change in silhouette has us wondering.....is there a new prince or princess on the way?

The Prince and the pauper!

Jacques and Vivienne met five years ago at the elite Elton Academy, where two generations of Armorican royalty have learned reading, ‘riting, and ‘rithmetic. Miss Meijer, whose middle-class parents are rumored to have taken out massive loans to fund their daughter’s education, was reportedly a poor student and “really antisocial,” according to a former classmate.

Her royal beau must not mind (she must have been offering something besides looks, intellect, and personality...) because the couple have been together ever since, and may now be expecting their first child together.

There’s just one small problem...Prince Jacques isn’t married to Vivienne Meijer. They’re not even engaged.

It’s all just rumors for now, but while we wait on official confirmation, we surveyed seven royal experts about what to expect in the coming months. Will Jacques and Vivienne be rushing to the altar? Can a baby born out of wedlock inherit a royal title? 85% of our experts say the answers “depend” on the circumstances, but royal etiquette expert Catarina Lynx was eager to chime in:

The King’s sister, Princess Olivia, welcomed a baby girl just five months after her surprise marriage to her former bodyguard. Times have changed, but the royal family are staunch traditionalists. If the Prince and his girlfriend are expecting, the public can expect a wedding announcement any day now!

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