#sharkofwisdom

I can prevent your murder but only if you admit to the camera that your public moral outrages are inconsistent sometimes.

Don't worry - the fatter you get, the happier your Imperial Stormtrooper tattoo appears to become.

Dear thinking minds: please examine the Universe and name its parts until you are quite dead.

Variety best eaten firm.

Terrify future generations by speaking normally about the matters of the day onto a long-lasting recording medium.

Nothing says 'energy' like an overpacked herbal infusion in a Garfield mug.

All caterpillars should check themselves for wasps before they pupate. Jesus said that.