#shakyhands

“You okay, Krel?”

Krel sighed and fixed his gaze on the empty chair to his right. He set the book onto the desk in front of him and ran his fingers shakily through his hair.

“I’m fine, Toby,” he said quietly. A quick glance in Toby’s direction told Krel he was not at all convincing. “I’m just tired.”

“Mm-hm, right. I’m sure Aja leaving and you beating yourself up all night has nothing to do with it,” Toby said pointedly, quirking one of his eyebrows. Krel’s face registered guilt. 

“Listen, dude,” Toby said, placing a hand on Krel’s shoulder, “you need to get some rest. Nothing’s going to get better if you avoid everything else.”

Instead of responding, Krel brought his hands up in front of his face and concentrated on the trembling in his fingers. He shook his head and scowled. “I don’t have time for this. If I can’t figure out how to repair our computer systems quickly, the entirety of Mother’s- of the Mothership’s disguise might fail.”

Toby pulled back his hand and watched, concerned, as Krel retrieved his book and a small device that had sat beside it. With one hand he tried to prop his book up against the lip of the desk so he could finger through the pages, and with the other he began to tug at some protruding wires for examination. 

“It can wait a little, can’t it?” Toby asked. He watched Krel fumble with two pages in his book stuck together, and then drop the little device in his other hand.

“Kleb!” Krel hissed, ignoring Toby and bending over to grab the fallen item. 

“Krel?”

Krel sighed impatiently and set his mouth in a straight line, refusing to answer Toby. He fiddled some more with the pages of his book, his hands trembling even more now. After finding no success in unsticking the two pages, he set the book down, more harshly this time, and groaned loudly. 

“If I could just-” He began to mutter to himself, something about how ridiculous it was that he couldn’t even utilize a book, of all things, and decided instead to pick at the little piece of technology. He held it with both hands and lifted it to eye level, squinting into one of its niches.

“Krel,” Toby deadpanned. This was beginning to get old. 

Of course, Krel ignored him and continued to try to pick at the wiring, hands shaking so badly now he nearly dropped the thing a number of times more. His expression grew increasingly more irritated and his mutterings more harsh as he struggled to so much as grasp at one of the wires.

“Ow!” He exclaimed, one of the severed wires sparking and sticking his thumb.

“Krel! Come on!” Toby exclaimed, leaning back in exasperation. Krel inhaled sharply, and all but slammed the small device onto the desk, turning to face Toby with a look of utmost irritation.

“What?” He demanded. Toby’s expression immediately fell and was replaced by mild fear. Krel deflated. “Sorry,” he said softly. “I’m just-”

“Don’t say tired again,” Toby cut in. Krel folded in on himself and looked down, hands fidgeting and clasping uneasily, sending tremors up his arms. “I know you’re tired. That’s normal, dude. But you’re not okay.”

“I c- I can’t focus on anything right,” Krel said, stumbling over his words. “I’ve never felt so alone. I can’t sleep knowing I’ll wake up without Aja, or Luug, or Varvatos, or anyone.”

“What about the blank bots? Lucy? Ricky?”

“That’s all they are, is bots. They have plenty of character and energy, but they’re not…. They don’t… I don’t know.” Krel glanced down at his hands again, fingers still shaking unevenly.

“Well… You have us!” Toby said, patting Krel on the back. “Me and Steve and everyone in Arcadia! And we’re not planning on going anywhere, any time soon.”

Krel smiled a little but kept his gaze down. Startling him somewhat, Toby reached over and dropped something into his shaking hands. 

“What is this?” Krel asked, sitting up and looking at Toby curiously.

“A roll of life-savers! They’re candies that you can suck on or crunch,” Toby explained. “There’s like, 50 billion layers of wrapper, but it’s pretty sweet once you get to the good stuff underneath. Kinda made me think of you, y’know? You saved lots of lives. And there’s a lot to you, but once we get to know you and see past your ‘layers’, you’re really cool.” Krel’s smile grew a little and he gave Toby an appreciative look.

“Thanks,” he said simply.

“No problem! Now you gotta do something for me in return,” Toby said half-mischievously. Krel cocked his head curiously. “I say you put away your research and go to bed, that’ll call it even.”

Krel sniggered and grasped the roll of candies more tightly in his hand. “I suppose so,” he agreed reluctantly.

“Alright!” Toby cheered, throwing a fist into the air victoriously. Krel let out a hearty laugh and shook his head. The trembling in his hands finally began to wane.