#shadow writes stuff

Octavia was glad that she was a beta.

It wasn't a particularly common viewpoint, among the Goetia. There were of course betas scattered among them like there were everywhere else in Hell, but even though those that were of the 'negative' designation tended to consider themselves the most rational thinkers, unbiased by extreme hormonal fluctuations and that time of the every-few-months, having a solid role chosen for you by fate was desirable in the long run for deciding how you were meant to benefit the Goetia as a whole… and they hadn't been gifted one.

Her uncle (the one on her mother's side, she never got to know many of her father's siblings particularly well) was a beta, the same as her. He leaned on being clever and proper and told her that it made them both special, let them think with their brains and not their legs, but she could hear the way his voice lilted a little when waxing about people 'having to waste so much time' on cycles. There was a little too much bitterness and jealousy there, even if it was smothered in haughtiness. His omega sister had gotten to marry and have a kid, after all, and he hadn't, even if he had once told her that being her uncle was plenty enough for him.

Octavia, however… didn't mind it. The concept of having to fully lose her thoughts, her sense of being, for a full day every few months, was unnerving and unreal.

When she was young, a year or so before the ceremony of announcing, Mum had pushed little boys at her during parties, cooing about how well they matched, how they might get to be together one day after they were designated. It made some of the boys flush as they looked over to her and the puffy dress her mother had insisted upon, but the bubbling in her belly didn't seem like the heat in the stories her father read to her in bed. It just felt like her stomach was eating itself, acid instead of fire at the thought of being held for too long by someone other than family.

Mum doted, sometimes for themselves for dinner and the like, but often when it would make their family-pack look good. She insisted that it would reflect badly on herself if they weren't in tip-top shape. What would people think of her for not making her family presentable, and of her father for not being able to present an image of strength and in control? (The usage of the second reason faded as Via got older, and it seemed like every time Mum had a problem with Dad, it was due to him not living up to the image that he was supposed to be, a perfect alpha who let her have everything she wanted and took care of everything she didn't.)

Mum said that too much coddling, too many bedtime stories with funny voices or piggyback rides, might spoil her. What she did should have been enough as she puffed up Octavia's dress sleeves and ran her fingers through her hair. Still, Dad had let Octavia rest in his lap as he did work, or pecked kisses on her forehead before bed, and it seemed normal enough to her, the way he carried her as easily as his hat or his cape.

Her father seemed to prefer to suppress his ruts, only disappearing once a year or so for long enough to hear it from the servants when Octavia asked where he was, and her mother spent so much time out of the house visiting various friends, it was difficult to know how she handled her heats. If any of them were spent together, it wasn't long enough for Octavia to tell. They seemed like an inconvenience, after you'd had the child that you wanted, biology trying to wring you out for more than you were willing to give. When she presented at twelve, Dad told her that it didn't really matter, that he would love and teach her the all same, and he seemed sincere about it.

Cycles and mating and hormones must be one of those adult things, she decided, where they pretended something was fun and important to their children and to each other to save face or to tell good stories, but it was really a bit annoying and took up precious time that could be better devoted to something else. Everything she had seen of other members of the Goetia only served to confirm it- everyone had a role to be carried out, nothing more, nothing less. Love was in the steadiness of staying, of making a life together after being bound with each other.

Then, her father met him.

He was every bit the stereotype of an obnoxious overcompensating alpha that she'd seen in books and movies. Loud, stinky enough with pheromones that even she could smell it with her admittedly not-great nose, violent, and horny. She wished desperately she could have avoided at least the last one, but somehow, it had rubbed off on her father despite a lifetime of being told that leaning on baser instincts outside of mating or upholding tradition was unbecoming.

Octavia's entire life, it had been easy to avoid thinking about him wanting that sort of thing. He'd had her with Mum, and then seemed perfectly content avoiding the matter whenever possible in reality, only indulging in romance books and soap operas that kept it solely to the realms of fiction. But the imp had turned him inside out, and the world tilted on its axis.

They shared a rut. Via could feel it in the way his magic pulsed and purred, how his feathers were preened differently after being puffed up. She could also see how he seemed… both more relaxed and more giddy, in the days after. He laughed easier, even at things that weren't funny. He sang louder when gardening. He had the idea to look over her schoolwork under the big tree for the fresh air, and smiled even when he made corrections before offering to take her to the mall.

It didn't make any sense.

Why was this different? Why did Dad let it happen? Why did it make him…

Alphas weren't supposed to be with other alphas, not in the world she knew. Even if designations seemed like they were a part of life best left to the side after they fulfilled their purpose, they followed deep biological rules carved far deeper than a few extra hugs. Alphas mated with omegas to have babies. Two alphas could have mutual respect or bristle at each other, but having an omega available and choosing another alpha instead, and an imp no less…

Why did this have to be one of the rules he bent, when it was supposed to be the strongest of all of them, the one burned into their bodies and dictating the curve of fate for those who carried it?

Was he just lashing out at Mum? It had upset her, certainly. But that didn't explain the way his magic had lightened, the way he stood a little straighter, spoke a little louder. If anything, he was acting the way people had always told her he should be. He was too quiet, before, too bookish, too anti-social. Too much like her, and her too much like him. But this wasn't something where she could follow his line, and the thread between them was fraying even as he tried to pull her into his orbit again, take her with the comet that was intent on setting her life on fire.

And then.

And then.

The imp turned out to be an omega. A liar, on top of everything else, but at least it helped things make a little more sense. But only a little.

Her father stayed with him, somehow.

Life went on, somehow.

Days trickled into weeks trickled into months, and Blitz began to integrate himself into her life. She saw him in the kitchen drinking coffee or making breakfast in the morning, and nibbling on snacks late at night. He was in the pool splashing around, or in the TV room asking questions about the plot lines of the soap operas, or listening to Dad read in the library with kicking feet and a swaying tail.

He offered her the pancakes he was making, and a little stuffed horse version of herself, and then a pile of bones and some feathers from a bird he apparently saw topside that had an admittedly pretty pattern. He called her Via, and when she told him that was for family only, he called her sweetie and said he'd do his best to earn it someday.

He was still loud, and annoying, but… he seemed to make her father happy, and he seemed to be trying, remembering things she liked and including her in food or conversation.

The divorce proceeded. The world kept turning. Bit by bit, she adjusted.

She met Blitz's employees.

Loona, his adopted daughter, she'd liked. She was interesting and did things like go to parties and concerts that had real modern dancing and real modern music, instead of the meticulously arranged music and traditional dances of the Goetia. Even though a few months in Loona admitted that the whole 'party' thing going well was pretty recent, it still counted in Octavia's opinion. She was an omega like Blitz was, but that didn't really matter by that point. Maybe all lower-class omegas had some growl and bite to them, not quite as honey-sweet and whimpering as in the stories because their trust had to be earned properly first.

No, Loona was fine. The problem, after she'd started to adjust to Blitz, was the other two. Millie and Moxxie.

It wasn't that they were particularly annoying, although it did take time to get used to the noise contained within the small office walls as they all bounced off each other. No, it was that they were both betas, they were both clearly infatuated with each other, and they were prone to kissing so often that even the sporadic days Octavia came to drop something off or talk to Loona, she saw it on multiple occasions in a span of just a few weeks.

Why? Why were they acting so much like a newly mated pair, without the intensity of alpha or omega hormones to drive them?

Omega heats spurred alphas into rutting, or ruts drew out heats. Simple cause and effect. Betas could have children, but that wasn't something the two of them seemed to be planning for, or at least she hoped that they weren't actively trying to conceive while in their work office. No, they seemed to be simply kissing just because they wanted to. All the time. Just because they could.

It was bizarre.

Really, though, all of them were far, far more physically affectionate than she was used to.

Blitz and Loona, she could rationalize. A pair of omegas bonded in a pack together. He often nuzzled close to her and pecked kisses on her cheek when he could reach it, or hugged her side when he just happened to be close. It was a little gross, but even though Loona made slight protests, she didn't seem to really mind. She'd been adopted several years ago, so they'd had time to get used to each other, which probably meant that embarrassing dad-kisses and hugs were something that was universal but ramped up by the omega thing.

The itch that kept catching in her brain was that the other two were just as bad, and they didn't have those instinctive hormones, or a family bond to use as an excuse. Their tails curled halfway into knots, and they were almost constantly in each other's laps even while on break. There was constant teasing and flirting, for no apparent reason at all.

She knew beta couples existed, of course. But the fact that their physical affection nearly equaled the sappy, horny gooiness that she'd always seen in movies between alphas and omegas, and recently between Blitz and Dad…

Maybe it was the fact that they were imps, and imps were just wired differently. But being in the middle of it all, sitting on a towel on the shores of one of the Gluttony beaches as Blitz insisted that one 'family fun day' would include all six of them… she could look out and see dozens of couples of all shapes and sizes getting just as close to each other, and found herself shrinking in her seat, pulling her cover-up tighter around herself.

It had been easy to simply assume it was due to her designation. Betas were less likely to be married, so the lack of interest was convenient, and gave her more time to focus on her passions. Why bother fussing about something that wasn't meant to be? She grew up seeing demons contorted into roles stiffer than corsets, with any debauchery shuffled behind closed doors and kept to the realms of gossip. There was an air of fantasy to the whole thing, something a step removed from the reality that she lived in and the body that she inhabited. It existed, but it didn't affect her, a bubble she hadn't realized that she'd floated in until it popped.

"So, you like anybody?"

Loona was sipping at a smoothie as she posed the question.

"Um."

"You don't have to tell me if it's private or whatever, I'm just kinda curious how that all goes with you guys since you haven't mentioned anyone before."

"I… don't think so?" She tried to trace her brain over her peers from the glances of conversations she'd had at parties, but they all slipped away like grains of sand through an hourglass, childhood running out as she rounded towards her eighteenth birthday. "Did you like somebody when you were my age?"

"I liked the looks of a couple people." Loona considered for a moment. "I was dealing with a lot of shit when I was your age, so not really, but hormones can be a bitch, beta or no. Good for you though, shit's kinda confusing sometimes. Might as well focus on other stuff while you've got the chance." She shrugged. "You want to come over to Russ's on Friday to listen to the new album?"

It had ended there, but the question had stuck in the back of her throat, especially after Gigi, another beta, had mentioned a previous girlfriend from when she'd been sixteen, and the other two didn't react to the idea as unusual at all.

Was that supposed to be normal?

Tentatively, she passed the question along to her father.

"When did you first realize you liked someone?"

He sputtered into his tea, droplets decorating his facial plate before he wiped his beak and cleared his throat.

"Oh, ah, was there a reason you ask?"

"I'm just curious, that's… that's all."

"Ah. Well. Hmm." He tapped his chin. "I was… well, I can pin it down to the day, actually! It was my twelfth birthday. Your grandfather took me to the circus to celebrate, and I saw the most delightful clown, and… I felt my face flush and my heart stutter. I've told you when I met Blitz before, I suppose it really was fate and some part of me knew…"

Twelve.

He had been twelve.

"So you just… saw him, and knew you liked him that way?"

"It was liking in the way children do- I liked the shape of his face and the way he spoke and laughed, and something about him made me flustered and awkward, but he was… well, you know him. Even as a child he was bold and funny. I imagined getting to play with him forever, and I've been lucky enough that somehow, it came true." He tilted his head, blinking. "Is there someone that you like, dear?"

Octavia pulled her legs up to her chest, eyes dropping to her knees. "I… I don't think so." She paused. "I don't think I like anyone at all."

He sucked in a breath, before rounding the table to pull her into a hug. "Oh, Via…"

"You said you were a little kid and you already-"

"Everyone is different, dear, maybe you simply haven't found that spark, that person, yet."

"But I just don't get it." She pulled back. "That would have been before you started feeling the alpha hormones, before it affected you. How does that work, if it's not… if it's…" She trailed off. "Why does everyone else seem to know what it feels like, no matter what they are?"

"So you haven't felt… anything at all? Not even for other girls? That was…" He cleared his throat. "That was part of what tripped me up a bit, at your age."

She shook her head. "Not girls, not boys, not anyone."

He squeezed her shoulder. "Maybe you're simply a late bloomer, but if not… we can look into it. I'm sure there's something out there. We'll find your truth, Starfire, I promise."

The talk had bolstered her enough to finally start plugging search terms into Voogle. One by one, the pieces began to knit together like the blankets that Blitz seemed so fond of bundling her and Loona up in.

Asexual. Aromantic. Maybe one, maybe both, but the words cast a spotlight on the lack of feeling, on the void settled between theory and reality in her brain

Once it was illuminated, though, the shadows of confusion cast away, she could fill it as she pleased, and there was no lack of new sensations and new experiences with this new pack of six. The stars around her glittered, making a miniature galaxy where there had once only been the routine of royal life. Blitz and his crude jokes who cared enough about her hobbies to get her trinkets from Earth and tagged her in to the movie rotation. Loona, her music and her friends and her strong hands that made messy braids that weren't proper but were comfortable. Millie, who showed her how to use a knife 'just in case' and slapped her back when she managed to hit even the edge of the target. Moxxie, who insisted on called her 'your highness' a few times at first, but ended up sharing tips on how to use her guitar by tracing over her fingers, and offered advice that helped her tighten up her scratched-out melodies.

She looked up from her notebook, full of sketches and concepts for lyrics, to see Millie feeding Moxxie a bite of meat while her father laughed at something Blitz had said. Loona was settled next to her on the couch, her tail casually resting over Octavia's own as she tilted her phone to share something funny she'd seen on Sinstagram.

“So, smart guy!” Bill had been grinning. It was in the way the corners of his eyes pinched up, how his pulsing glow on each word was brighter. “You want to help me with something, don’t you?”

“Of course!” Ford floated easily towards him, gravity a mere suggestion that could be brushed aside here in the place where dreams become reality and reality twisted to the wildest fancies of the imagination. "Why wouldn't I? It has to be more interesting than watching the gnomes trying to capture bath squirrels again. The forest is starting to really settle down for winter."

“See, this is why I like you, Fordsie, always asking just the right questions!” Bill lightly tapped a finger on Ford’s nose, and a rush of lava spiraled down his nerves at the touch. “Now, you promised your body to me, and I’ve been using it plenty well- keeping you up and running past those silly human limits so we can get the really important work done, fixing the little stresses here and there, things like that. There’s something I’ve been wanting for eons, but no one else was good enough- not until you.”

“Bill, I-” Even without the limitations of the human body present in the projection, instinctively Ford found himself swallowing at the compliment. “Thank you. I’ll do my best to live up to whatever it is. So! What do you need? Does it have anything to do with the portal?”

“You’re the human vessel to help carry my- our genius to the masses, you already knew that, but I’ve got even bigger plans for this hunk of rock.” Bill snapped his fingers with another ‘smile’ (perhaps sharper than usual, eye a bit more narrowed?) and a deal-flame burned bright blue-

-Before he plunged it directly into Ford’s stomach.

The red-hot pain that ignited every soft organ below the lungs was almost enough to throw Ford back into the waking world, but Bill’s fingers merely curled inside of him as he whistled, rummaging around until a new pain of something swelling, growing, mixed with a wave of pleasure to counter the agony currently cauterizing his organs. Wave after wave of mixed sensations radiated out from the intrusion as a noise even he couldn't define slipped from his lips, and he clawed at the air with moans muffled into the infinity of the Mindscape.

“There we go, figured I might as well toss you a bone for dealing with this! Woo, this is going to be a lot to handle for an oily sweat beast meat-sack like you, but you’re a good human, you’ll manage.”

“Wh- what is?” Ford managed to stutter as Bill pulled his hand out, thick red with sparks of starlight dripping from the sleek black fingers all the way up to the elbow. Nothing existed in his mind but questions, even as the pain sucked into itself like a black hole and disappeared. “What did you do to- what did you put in there?”

“Why, our child, of course!”

There was a moment’s silence as Ford processed that before an actual record scratch sounded somewhere in the Mindscape, which just made Bill slap his knee and cackle.

“Oh, oh that is perfect timing. Your brain is a riot, Sixer, you know that?”

“Our child…?” Ford’s eyes had widened to the point that the lids had nearly receded into the skull, and one hand instinctively dropped to the still-oozing stomach, droplets of flickering silver mixing with deep maroon. “That can’t be-”

“Exactamundo, our child! Offspring, half-clone, spawn, whatever you want to call it!” Bill summoned his cane specifically to spin it and jab the end into Ford’s chest. “I’ve told you my whole tragic backstory-” (Ford’s eyes instinctively darted up to the hat and he felt a pang unrelated to the whole hand-shoving-through-guts thing) “-But I figured it was time to move on fully, starting a family of my own. And you’re the lucky candidate that I’d like to spend the rest of your life with! You’re smart, you’re a freak, you’ve already given me complete control over your body, and I wouldn’t mind a little rugrat running around with your cute little face on the part of the time they don’t look like me!”

“The part of the-” Ford shook his head to himself. That was not the thing to focus on, and his fingers curled around the stomach of his sweater tight enough that the threads unwound in the non-air. “Bill, I don’t have the- the- equipment for this!”

“And I’m a triangle, but do you really think I can’t make a few adjustments on that little problem? You wound me! Seahorses do it, it’s just a design flaw that humans can’t, really!” Bill rested his palm atop Ford’s knuckles. “I just needed to scoop out a little extra space- you don’t need all of those organs, so I just combined a few. They should work just as well!” He waved his free hand. “Besides, you said you wanted to do something for me. I’ve barely asked you for anything, and this is an honor!”

“Bill, I-” Ford’s free hand raised to tangle in his hair as the dream deity pressed up against his middle as if listening for a heartbeat already. “It’s not that I’m not flattered-”

“Then what is it, brainiac?” Bill tilted upward. “We’re already changing the world, and you’ve already pledged your life to me. We can be happy together. What’s one more string sewing us together? I picked you for a reason.”

He floated up, gripping a cheek in each hand as his single eye met both of Ford’s, sticky silver and ruby blood mixing together and oozing down the skin. “I already told you, I can’t imagine anyone else I’d want to do this with, and isn’t this what humans are meant to do, squirt out squirmy little genetic reproductions of themselves? Let’s face it, you’re never going to meet a girl, and this way you’ll change the world with the portal and by carrying the first new member of my species in a trillion years!”

His thumb stroked the skin as he tilted slightly, as if turning his head. “You’re the only one I’d want this with. Don’t you trust me, Fordsy?”

It may have been the leftover heat of the deal-fire from whatever Bill had done before, but Ford found his cheeks burning as his mouth fell open slightly, a puff of breath escaping.

“...Yes.” The truth of the admission came from deep within, even as doubts squirmed like pinned insects. “I- I have given myself body and soul, you know that.”

“Good boy.” Bill’s bloody fingers shifted, one thumb sliding between Ford’s wet lips, and Ford instinctively sucked, getting a pat with the other hand as liquid stardust slipped down his throat, igniting his stomach with a far more pleasurable flame that shot further south. “Now then! This is the fun part!”

Spencer laid in the bed beside his partner for a long time, watching them sleep. Every twitch their face made, every breath they breathed, and move they made, Spencer witnessed it. He wasn’t sure if he just missed them, or if he was just making sure they were still alive. It wasn’t irrational, or anything. Okay, maybe it was. When he realized that it was creepy watching the person beside him sleep, he sat up, grabbed a random book, and read instead.

The night quickly turned into dawn and he grew exhausted. Deciding a couple hours of sleep was better than nothing, Spencer placed his book on the night stand, pulled the blankets up to his chin, and turned to face his partner. He soon found himself watching them sleep.

“It’s creepy watching people sleep, Spencer,” his partner mumbled as they rolled onto their side. A small smile grew across Spencer’s lips as he watched their eyes open and meet his. “Couldn’t sleep?”

“How’d you know?” he asked as he brought a hand to their face. They hummed happily as they placed their hand on top of his. 

“You got this look on your face that just says you didn sleep… Even after a long week of work and travel. But also I work up a couple hours ago and saw you reading,” they sighed as they looked back at Spencer. Spencer looked at them and shrugged.

“Figured I could get a couple hours in before the day started,” he sighed. His partner smiled before shifting closer to him. “What’re you doing?”

“Gonna be the big spoon. Roll over,” they hummed as they wrapped an arm around his body. Spencer breathed out a laugh before rolling around so his body fit the curve of his partners. “Get some sleep before the start of the day. I’ll be here,” they added in a whisper. 

“That sounds more right,” I laughed. From the corner of my eye, I could see Steve looking at me. The smallest smile on his lips as he offered me his hand. I looked down at it, the small golden shine of his wedding band catching my eye. I smiled, staying still for a moment before resting my hand in his. “Mrs. Wheeler sure knows how to throw a party.”

“Well, she didn’t a few years back,” Steve laughed as his attention was fully back on the snowy and icy roads ahead of us. Rainbows of lights whizzed by us as he picked up speed a bit. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Well, back when Nancy and I were…” He paused and glanced at me, testing the waters before he continued, “Dating, Mrs. Wheeler was sort of against… Any kind of party.”

“House parties are different. Especially when most of the guests are adults now,” I laughed as I turned to face him a bit more. He glanced at me and nodded.

“Either way, still a great party,” I mused as I leaned closer to him. He smiled before pulling my hand closer to his lips to kiss. The rest of our ride home was filled with random conversations and soft Christmas music. 

Once we were home, Steve quickly went to the kitchen while I found myself wandering to the living room. The couch was soft when I sat on it, the various throw pillows falling against me. I leaned forward to unbuckle my shoes, kicking them off and as far away from me as possible. Now if only I could rip the stupid pantyhose off me without ruining them. Who am I kidding, they were ruined the moment I pulled them on.

A certain warmth grew in the room, causing me to look up. Steve was standing by the fireplace, moving a few logs before crippling up some old newspapers. I smiled when he lit a match and tossed it into the fireplace. Then he stood and approached me.

“C’mere,” Steve whispered as he stood in front of me. The lights of our tree illuminated his face, making his skin turn different hues of purples, pinks, and blues. I stared at him, watching him extend his hand out to me. A soft smile grew across his lips as he nodded to his extended hand. I looked back at him through my eyelashes before resting the tips of my fingers on the palm of his hand. 

A second later, Steve pulled me off the couch and into his chest. His free hand rested on my hip while he held me close. I looked up at him as I rested my hand on his chest. 

“Whatcha doin’, Steve?” I asked as he slowly started swaying to the beat of Bing Crosby’s White Christmas. The hem of my skirt flowed smoothly with each movement we had made, almost as if it was waterlike. 

“Slow-dancing with the love of my life,” he whispered as he pulled me even closer. Each of his words hit the shell of my ear and quickly made their way to my heart. I took a shaky breath and moved back slightly to look at his face. 

Though his face was still illuminated by the various colored lights, I could see the faintest blush grow across his face. The corner of his lip twitched upwards into a cheeky smirk. Even though his smile was a little sly, the expression in his eyes told me everything he was to embarrassed to say. 

“I appreciate you waiting till I took those ridiculously uncomfortable shoes off. Pretty sure my feet haven’t been this swollen since high school band,” I exasperated. Steve laughed before pressing his lips to my forehead.

“Nothing like slow dancing barefooted in the living room lit by the Christmas tree,” he mused. I hummed happily as I rested my head on his shoulder. With each light beat of his heart, I could feel myself growing more and more drowsy. The warmth of the house only added to the sleepiness. 

“It was smart starting a fire,” I softly whispered as more warmth (in both feeling and sight) appeared in the living room. Steve chuckled softly and nodded before turning to show me the fireplace with a lit fire.

“Figured you’d be cold,” he spoke with such gentleness. I looked up at him and smiled. My chin resting on the middle of his chest. A strand of hair fell in front of his eyes as he looked down at me. 

“I guess you figured correctly,” I giggled. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he whispered before pressing his lips to mine. But the sweet moment was ruined the moment Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree started playing over the radio. With a gasp, I moved away from him. My eyes, like the christmas tree, lit up with excitement. 

“I LOVE THIS SONG!” I shouted as I quickly changed our slow dancing to a fast-paced jitterbug. Steve laughed as he stood stalk where he stood. Once the song was in full swing did he finally humor me and start the crazier dancing with me. 

“It was a tender moment for, well, a moment,” Steve laughed as he spun me out. I laughed again as he pulled me back into his body. With both of his arms wrapped, he held me close to him. My head craned a bit to look at him. Ignoring the music that played over us, I went up to kiss him again. 

“You’re my favorite present, you know that,” I whispered. He smiled before shrugging slightly.

“I figured as much,” he retorted before kissing me again. “Good thing you’re my favorite present. Look’it you, all wrapped up,” he said as he snuggled closer to me. I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.

{***}{***}{***}

The doors had been locked, walls soundproofed, and the smeets kept firmly away for the next few hours to wait for the newest batch of future siblings.  Zim ran a hand over his stomach as Dib fussed with the nest, adjusting and re-adjusting the pillows. It was a big clutch this time- seven eggs. 

Laying, however, was something he was more than used to, even with a few extras. Dib adjusted his goggles before his gloves slid under Zim's tunic to shift it up, exposing the gravid belly underneath. A few years ago, he might have been able to make out subtle bumps with the individual eggs, but now, a soft layer of fat smoothed over it to make him perfectly round.

"Ready?" Dib's claws hooked under the fabric, but instead of tearing through, he slid it over Zim's head. Zim had already kicked off his boots, and he tried to remove his tights as well before slumping back with a groan.

"Once I get these off I- oh." Zim's eyes widened, antennae leaping straight up as Dib bent down, completely hidden behind his stomach. He felt teeth brush against his thigh, draaaaaaaagging the fabric down bit by bit. Dib was using his fingers to pull down the right side while his mouth handled the left, and by the time he threw the leggings away, Zim was beginning to soak the blankets underneath him. 

"I'll take that as a yes." Dib's own antennae were perked forward, delicious hormones diffusing through the air and intermingling with Zim's own. He set a hand on Zim's hip, tracing up, up, up to end on the top of his belly. "You're incredible at this."

"Of course I am." Zim grinned. "No irken could make smeets as well as I can. You're lucky that you found me."

"I'm lucky you're so eager to be my little breeding pet," Dib murmured, hand tracing down and over Zim's sternum to cup his chin and force him to look directly into Dib's eyes. "You carry so well."

"Only because you treat me so well," Zim said, legs falling open as Dib leaned forward, pulling him into a kiss. Dib reached up, finding Zim's antenna and pulling it down so as soon as he rose from the kiss he could pop the top in his mouth. Zim's eyes squeezed shut, panting out. "Dib..." Dib's tongue ran down the of the antenna, length a definite advantage of an irken tongue. Dib waited until he could practically feel the heat radiating from his hand that had drifted to Zim's cheek to release it, smiling down at him before shifting back down to legs.

He was slick-heavy, both with broken water and sweet arousal. Dib licked his lips. He always wanted to devour every bit of Zim, mark him as his in every way he could, but birth days were always the best- he was ripe like the richest fruit and eager to fall apart in Dib's hands, short and plump and the picture of a carrier. Dib ran his tongue up Zim's petals, and Zim hooked his feet behind Dib's neck, one kicking out hard enough to almost knock his Pak off when Dib dug his tongue inside of the entrance.

"Dib!"

"You love it," Dib muffled a laugh against Zim's inner thighs, and the vibrations made the petals soften further against his cheek.

"Stop knowing me!"

"It's a little late for that." Dib pressed kisses against the thigh. "I know you like honey on your drinks, and you don't like it when I take too long in the lab when you need attention. And you always need attention. I know how soft you can be with the smeets, and how you sing in the shower." He let his teeth graze the soft skin and felt Zim's toes curl on his back. "And I know just how much this all turns you on."

Zim made a hmmph-ing sound, but the longer Dib worked, the more it morphed into a low moan. Eventually, his legs relaxed again, falling back, and Dib felt movement to his right. He turned to see the first egg beginning to pass. 

"Good, there's one. Just stay relaxed, you know the routine by now," Dib said, holding out a hand as Zim grunted. The egg slid out and into his palm, and Dib set it aside before turning back to the entrance. He begin to kiss the soft skin around it, and Zim's claws ripped through the fabric of the nest. 

"D-Dib..."

Dib didn't respond, lavishing attention on Zim as he melted underneath the eager kisses and licks. Soon enough, another egg neared. Dib didn't even need to tell Zim to push, he was already doing it, he really was so good at this. Even though there were more than usual, the eggs were the same as always, and it slipped through, widening the entrance for just a moment as it slid into the pillow.

The pattern repeated, Dib softening Zim up so the eggs had minimal resistance and the eggs moving right through. Three, four, five, six, slight variations in size but not enough to bother Zim. Seven, however, was having a problem.

Sweat beaded Zim's face, and he peered over himself. He could see Dib's tall antennae now as he bobbed up and down, pleasuring Zim the way no one else ever could or would. "Where is it?"

"It's coming, be patient."

"I want to see it- eep!" Dib had left a playful nip where Zim's thigh met his petals, and it melted his squeedlyspooch to goop. Every one of his nerves was firing red-hot, and his hips bucked at the latest contraction. He wanted the egg out so he could curl up and rest, so he could finish, but it was stubborn. It must be the Dib in it. Zim could still feel it, heavy in his pelvis, and panted into the warm air. 

"It's coming, just relax."

"I was relaxed until this one refused to- oh!" There it was. The egg was larger than its siblings, that was for sure, and Zim could feel himself being stretched further than usual. Dib wiggled his fingers in to help ease it out, and a series of flurried clicks and chirps erupted from Zim. 

"That's it, it's okay, I have it," Dib soothed, and Zim's hips and ass tightened before the egg slid out. He felt empty, like a mech without a pilot, until Dib set the egg away and peppered kisses over him again. He was still wet in every meaning of the word, and a few well placed suckles on the petals of his entrance was all it took for him to cum, moaning out Dib's name. 

Dib emerged, pink dripping from his lips as he licked them clean. "I see why seven was a problem." He held it up- it was about a size and a half as large as a regular egg. "It might be twins, or it might be a regular smeet that's just really big."

"Either way..." Zim started, before he had to catch breath. "Either way, it's ours."

Dib carefully wrapped the egg in a blanket before scooting up next to Zim, kissing his forehead. "It is. You've done well."

There was nothing unusual about it in concept; the Nohrian royals all seemed to run solely on what Leo had once jokingly described as 'dirty bean water'. The confusion arose from the fact Leo was using a bowl instead of a cup, which there were plenty of as they were strewn about the room.

Takumi finally broke the silence. 'Any particular reason why you're doing... that?' His eyes narrowed, it looked like he trying to figure out what was going on in the Nohrian prince's head more than anything else.

Leo briefly set the bowl down, and the first time he tried to speak he was interrupted by his own snort of laughter. He was grinning like an idiot even after he tried to compose himself. 'Just wait 'til Xander walks in, then you'll know why.' Hinoka felt her head tilt to one side instinctively as Leo took another sip from the bowl. The Nohrian prince caught on to the gesture as a sign to elaborate.

'Trust me, you've never watched something quite as spectacular. You can physically see Xander have a small heart attack and simultaneously watch his faith in humanity die a little more.'

As if staged, Xander walked in the moment after Leo had finished talking. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw his little brother, his expression completely unreadable, and almost immediately walked back out of the room without so much as a sound.

A few tense seconds of silence later and Leo had erupted with laughter. Hinoka saw Takumi physically jump at the same moment, before he once again narrowed his gaze. Hinoka couldn't help but laugh a little herself, something about Leo's laughter was contagious to her, even if others would look on, too baffled by Leo’s sense of humour for words.

Leo had to wipe tears away from his eyes before he could attempt to compose himself again. Takumi raised an eyebrow, expecting the reason behind such bizarre behaviour, even for Leo who was somewhat infamous for such things.

Leo had to make a few attempts to start without laughing, but he eventually got it. 'Well, you see; one morning back at Castle Krakenburg, I was doing this exact thing - you know, coffee out of a bowl. Before Xander was able to think of how to phrase 'bro, what the fuck' in a more... Xander-y way, I turned to him and said 'Oh hey Xander! What a morning, right? It's pretty muggy out there.'.' Leo had to take a minute to find his already faltering composure before continuing. 'Xander just looked at me, with this completely blank expression, before he began to suspect something was up. He turned around to walk back out and said to me 'If I go outside and I see a single cup; I'm disowning you as a brother.'.' Leo paused to take another sip of his coffee, before adding; 'He didn't speak to me for a month. But it was worth it.'

Takumi just stared, he looked more lost than before, but Hinoka couldn't help but let out a snort of laughter much like Leo had done. 'So... what, had you placed a cup outside the door?' She asked, picturing the look of utter disappointment Xander must have had.

'What do you take me for? Some kind of animal?' Leo began, with a jokingly offended tone. His grin widened, 'I wouldn't do this kind of thing half-assed, oh no. Xander was greeted with every single cup from the castle.'

Takumi shook his head in disbelief, 'No, Xander would have noticed something like that.'

'Oh, I know. That's why I did it at night, since he actually sleeps, unlike your brother.' The shine in Leo's eyes told Hinoka that this was an achievement he was still proud of. 'Elise helped me make sure I got them all, of course.' Hinoka knew that Leo had an irregular stance on sleep, but staying up all night just for one joke did seem a little... well, extreme, however it must have been quite the sight to behold. She couldn't help but chuckle again. Takumi was dumbfounded, he looked as if he was trying to find what was so funny about the event. Hinoka could almost physically see him trying to figure it out because of how intense his expression was.

Suddenly, Leo stopped giggling like a child and sighed deeply. 'I peaked that day.' He suddenly sounded tired; some kind of melancholy? 'I doubt I'll ever reach that level again, it's just been downhill since.'

Hinoka was about to awkwardly pat the prince on the back at an attempt to console him, but as suddenly as the down spell had come on, it was gone again. 'So that's the story of why Xander doesn't let me get near cups unsupervised.'

Takumi blinked. 'Seriously?' He seemed a bit more inclined to believe the Nohrian prince now.

Leo nodded, 'Of course, he hardly ever knows where I am, so fuck the system, am I right?' He took another long sip of his coffee, not taking his eyes off of Takumi.