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Summary: You had been with Serj sense the very beginning, supporting every step throughout his journey. However, as things get tougher and you spent more time alone whilst he was out touring, you're faced with a rather hard decision: Stay and wait for his return? Or just go?
Warnings: Swearing, breaking up, angst, and mentions of depression
Word count: 4,536
You and Serj had initially met when you were just young children. When the boy had relocated to Los Angeles around the age of seven, his family had moved into a home positioned just three buildings away from yours. The two of you grew up upon the same block, attended the same school, and only lived about a minute walk away from each other. From the moment the two of you began school, you were practically inseparable.
During your early childhood, the two of you would sit together during class, frolic side by side upon the playground, and often get in trouble together by the adults within your life. When your families would connect, all your mother would do was talk about how often you ranted about the young man. Your mom still remembers the first day she was introduced to the boy; you were about seven or eight, and whilst visiting the grocery store, you suddenly bolted from your mothers grasp. Your unexpected movement caused your mother to panic for a second, and before she could capture you once more, you had already collided with the boy, wrapping your arms around each other in a delightful hug.
"This must be Serj?" Your mother inquired once she finally caught up to you.
His mother returned a kind smile once your own mom had arrived, nodding whilst she laughed.
"And this must be (Y/N)?" She responded, causing the two women to break out into laughter.
As the two of you developed, you grew into young teens beside each other. You entered middle school with one another, remaining the best of friends. Sure, you two shared a variety of silly disagreements and immature arguments with one another. However, these moments of disconnect would never last long, and before you knew it, the two of you were attached at the hip once more.
Entering high school, both of you quickly acknowledged your undeniable feelings towards one another.
One afternoon, a storm had erupted from within the sky, pouring water from the clouds and filling the atmosphere with the echo of repetitive thunder. That evening, Serj had appeared upon your front doorstep, and the sky had successfully soaked the young man, wet rain covering his clothes along with drenching his hair. You were alerted by a firm knock resonating from the entrance of your home, and you quickly responded by jumping from your bed and rushing downstairs. Once you had arrived before the front door, you opened it to reveal the young man placed upon the porch.
For a brief second, you giggled at the males rather amusing appearance, his wet locks dangling in front of his eyes and his soaked clothing sticking to his thin body. However, a different detail quickly captivated your attention and destroyed any sign of your previous laughter. The young man was supporting a singular, damp flower, a plant that was hunched over and almost destroyed as a result of the current weather.
"(Y/N), will you be my girlfriend?" He asked before you could say anything at all.
After that night, you kept that flower, and it still remained hidden deep within your closet to this very day. However, the gift was no longer drenched. Overtime, you had successfully dried the plant and kept it stored within a firmly sealed container.
The two of you dated all throughout high school, considered a perfect match and the epitome of true love by your peers. You guys rarely fought, and if you did, it could hardly be considered a argument, more of a peaceful disagreement. You would sneak out in the middle of the night to meet one another, both of you would stay on the phone late into the evening, and the boy greatly enjoyed composing love songs for you. The two of you were constantly joyous together and often spotted with one another, connected within the halls and adventuring around town. The idea of you guys breaking up appeared practically impossible to anyone who actually knew the two of you.
However, following graduation, the two of you were heading in extremely opposite directions. You were attending a college located in a different state, and Serj was studying at a university within California. The break up was very difficult and painful, you cried within each others arms for what seemed like hours. This was not at all what either of you had wished for, you had not desired to end your relationship, you honestly yearned to stay together for the rest of your lives. But, you knew this was the best option for the two of you.
It was very obvious that you would not be able to remain within a close and strong relationship. You guys would never be able to visit, you would be too busy perusing your academic achievements to call every day, and you were aware of the fact that this relationship would not remain the same if it had altered into a long distance commitment. You proceeded to cut off all contact, not exchanging a singular letter or sharing a phone call throughout your college years.
Over time, the two of you had grown and morphed into wonderful, young adults. You guys had experienced a variety of new relationships throughout your college years, you had made new friends, and created new bonds. However, this didn't stop your brain from thinking of Serj from time to time. You would reminisce upon your intimate bond, remember all of the secrets you had shared, and often wonder what he was currently up to. Although you would never admit it, the relationship you had created with the young man was never something you could replicate. You had never been as close to another individual as you had been with Serj.
Years later, your paths seemed to cross once more when you accidentally made contact with the man. Whilst exploring the world and living your lives throughout your early twenties, once you had grown into a delightful young women and Serj had morphed into a striking young man, you ran into the male one day.
You were about twenty-five when you returned to Los Angeles, reappearing within the place you grew up in order to further expand your career. Although you held out no sort of hope regarding the man, not expecting to ever reconnect again, you were quickly proven wrong.
As you were moving your belongings into your new home, dragging boxes from your lawn into your empty living room, your attention was suddenly drawn by a familiar voice.
"(Y/N)?" You heard a mans voice inquire from behind you.
You slowly turned around before coming face to face with your previous lover. The two of you had gone through many years of change and growth, experiencing many new lovers, and taking part within life changing events. Even though he had grown much taller, his features had altered from a young boy into a grown man, and his clothing style was much different, you immediately recognized the male. His soft eyes, curly hair, and kind smile was an image you would never be able to erase from your memory.
As if you were children once more, you suddenly dropped the cardboard container within your grasp, unconcerned regarding the belongings located inside the box as you heard it clatter against the ground. You practically jumped into the males arms, pouncing upon him as he captured you within a tight hug. It was as if you were suddenly seven years old again and had just spotted each other within public for the first time.
"Serj!" You exclaimed with joy as he effortlessly swung you around.
Reuniting with your past lover felt like destiny, as if it was supposed to occur, like the world had really planned for the two of you to be together, no matter what. Both the emotions and sensations you felt within that moment almost brought you to tears. A mix of happiness, relief, and even a bitter sense of sweet sorrow were currently coursing through your veins whilst the two of you captured one another within your arms.
The years that followed that moment felt like a dream come true. The two of you quickly got back together, spending every moment side by side. As if he was attempting to recreate your past, the male had arrived upon your door step one evening, supporting a singular flower as he asked you to be his girlfriend once more. Along with the flower you had obtained a decade prior, you kept that plant, storing it away beside the original one you had received.
Things quickly escalated as the two of you moved into a new home with one another. You decorated your house together, bought new cars with one another, and Serj had even proposed to you.
You had cried that day, the evening when your lover finally asked you to marry him. His voice was slightly trembling as he offered to officially spend the rest of his days with you, all whilst presenting a gorgeous ring within his palms. You had barely even allowed the sentence to fully exit Serj's mouth before you exclaimed your agreement, jumped into his arms, and planted a firm kiss upon his lips, all whilst the two of you exploded with tears of pure joy.
As the days and months advanced, you supported the males love for music. You encouraged him during the writing process, you inspired him to further his career, and you had attended every little show and event he preformed at. You were always located within the front row during his small concerts, screaming and cheering as you supported your lover.
The two of you were thrilled when the group first took off. Serj would return every evening with some sort of gift or treat for you. You were so proud every time he got recognized or noticed by a fan, and the two of you would always squeal with delight whenever one of his songs would appear upon the radio.
When he originally informed you about the idea of a first tour, you were all for it. You encouraged the male, supported him, and even further pushed him to agree to such a big event.
The first tour was a complete hit. Although you missed your lover so dearly, your emotions of sadness were always quickly overpowered by pride and joy. Everytime one of their songs would appear upon the radio or you would view one of his concerts from upon the television screen, you would always smile so wide your face muscles began to ache.
He would call you every night, talk with you on the phone for as long as you had desired, and you would repeat this process everyday. You two would chat about your days, share silly stories, and confess your most sincere feelings towards one another.
Furthermore, many mornings, you would awake to find a package positioned upon your door step, addressed to you. And every time you opened it, there was a sweet gift from your lover revealed within the box. Sometimes, he would sent you beautiful flowers or romantic chocolates, and other times, he would purchase amazing clothes or adorable trinkets for you.
However, things quickly changed as time went on. As Serj began to gain more fame and popularity, he started to attended more concerts and tours. And this often left you home alone, for months. He became busier and much more occupied as time went on, and this resulted in you receiving less calls and gifts. However, you were never angry towards the man, you couldn't even fathom being upset regarding Serj and his progress. Although you were always there to support and cheer for the male, you became more unhappy with your current life style.
One evening, you returned home after work to your empty home once again. You had spent the whole day attending your average job and exciting basic tasks, such as sending messages to coworkers to stopping to get gas. When you were finally free from your job and had completed all of your responsibilities, you returned home. As you stepped foot within your house, it was completely dark and motionless.
You set your bags down by the front door, flicked on one of the many lamps, in order to illuminate the room, and quickly kicked off your shoes before you practically flopped down upon the couch. The entire house was silent, and the best way you figured to fill the quietness was the turn on the television, like you had always done.
You stretched yourself across the length of the sofa, not having to worry about making room for another individual as you dominated the entire couch. The remote sat loosely within your grasp as you discovered what was being broadcast upon the television before you. It was your fiancé. An interview with Serj was being displayed upon the screen, the reporter was asking him a variety of questions, especially regarding his music and career.
You quickly changed the channel.
If this had been months prior, you would have absorbed within every second of the interview, shouting out the answer to each question with glee before Serj could properly respond. You knew every reply as if you had been studying for a quiz. Before he got really famous, your lover had shared all of these facts with you.
However, you were no longer able to turn on the radio or watch television anymore, without your mind being haunted by the man that you love. You couldn't stand to view him as he talked and laughed amongst his band members, a sound of pure joy that you hadn't heard in real life for what felt like centuries. At that point in time, you truly believed that the world interacted more with your lover than you did.
You quickly decided upon watching an episode of some random show you had probably seen a million times before. About thirty minutes into your viewing experience, the telephone rang. The chime of the phone quickly erupting throughout the previously tranquil environment, causing you to suddenly flinch within your seat.
You huffed as you moved from your position and rose to your feet. You had not even bothered to pause the television, due to the fact that you really didn't care for the show currently being displayed.
you trudged over to the small table the home phone resided upon before retrieving the receiver from the smooth surface. As soon as the phone made contact with your head, a voice echoed into your ear.
"Hiiii, honey." Serj exclaimed, his tone filled with enthusiasm and joy.
The echo of your lovers voice entering your ears brought a small smile to your lips. A sheepish grin was plastered upon your face as if it was your crush calling you for the first time in history.
However, your previous delight filled smirk quickly vanished as you remembered the fact that this was the first moment Serj had contacted you in about a month or so. Furthermore, the fact that you could only interact through the phone, rather than within real life, was also relatively upsetting. Within that moment, more than anything, you desired the return of your lover, for him to appear within your home so the two of you could finally embrace each other once more.
"Hey, Serj." You responded, your emotions of sorrow echoing through the phone more than you had planned.
The male immediately perceived the sadness laced within your tone and a frown was brought upon his lips. He attempted to continue the conversation, striving towards brining you joy as the two of you chatted. Even though he knew that the ultimate point of the conversation would just lead to further sadness, he wanted to morph the interaction into something more positive and normal.
Although both of you were aware of the reality of your current situation, your lover attempted to transform the phone call into a seemingly average experience. He wanted the conversation to appear normal, as if he was calling from his job to check up on you, like he was going to return within an hour or so. However, as much as Serj tried, nothing about the situation was considered typical or common.
"How are things?" Serj inquired, his voice sounding much more serious compared to his previous statement.
You attempted to further bury your feelings by biting your lip, deciding to lie about your miserable life at home.
"Oh, uhm theyer fine. What about you? Are you having a good time?" You asked, forcing a false smile in order to appear much more strong and stable over the phone.
You truly believed that if you focused more upon the male, you would be able to remain calm and collected. You were very aware of the reality that as soon as you even thought about confronting your emotions of loneliness and dejection, your entire facade would crumble. You would no longer be able to act happy or appear content, your sorrow and misery would quickly be revealed through a string of painful sobs.
Without a moment of hesitation, the males voice erupted from the other end of the phone.
"Yeah!" Your lover exclaimed, his voice filled with absolute delight "Its awesome here, every concert is absolutely thrilling."
Although you were happy for him, proud that he was succeeding and glad he was having a good experience, you couldn't help but feel slightly hurt. He was miles away, partying every night with his friends, never alone, and up to God knows what else. Yet, everyday, you returned to your empty home, to sit by yourself, and not mutter a single word to anyone else. You were completely jealous, disappointed, and felt betrayed.
"Thats great, babe. Im glad." You responded.
Although you had attempted to display your pride and happiness for the male, your statement just came off as hollow and simulated.
Silence filled the shared line after your rather harsh statement was received by the male. In an attempt to lighten the mood and destroy the awkwardness, you continued the conversation with a much more honest, sincere, and true statement.
"I miss you, Serj." You confessed, tears brimming the lids of your eyes and completely blurring your vision "I wish I could be there with you."
Within that moment, it felt as if someone had stabbed a knife through your heart. Your chest felt hollow as you held back your tears. You were trying not to cry in order to avoid possibly upsetting Serj and even maybe ruining his evening.
You knew that the second he perceived your shaking voice and trembling breath, his heart would break within seconds and he would fly back home that instant. This man truly loved you so much, he was willing to shatter his entire career just to be with you within that moment. However, you could not possibly risk ruining everything he had worked so hard for just by expelling a singular sob. Although you were completely broken and depressed, you were aware of the fact that this was the best option for Serj and his life.
"Oh I miss you too honey, so much. Things will get better. We'll be together before you know it." Serj stated, his voice calm and soothing as he attempted to reassure you.
For a moment, his sweet sentence achieved its goal, bringing a soft smile to your lips as you let out an amused yet exhausted chuckle. Your lovers words of affirmation and compassion always seemed to calm you down. It was as if Serj was the only individual within the entire world that could successfully comfort and console you.
However, the joy was quickly yanked from your being once more as your lover continued to talk.
"However, about that..." As his suddenly tense words entered your ears, your previous grin of delight completely vanished "I wont be home for a few extra months."
You could not ignore the pure disappointment and pain currently flowing through your body.
"Oh..." You responded, your tone suddenly flat and void of emotion.
Upon the other end of the phone, Serj was biting his lip. He quickly became nervous and worried as a result of your short and hollow response.
"Im sorry, honey. I really want to be with you again, but they scheduled more concerts for our tour." Your lover further explained.
You were currently overcome with sensations of disappointment, sadness, and slight anger. Although you knew Serj would do anything for you, within that moment, it felt as if you meant nothing to the man. It appeared as if you were the least important thing within the males life within that instance.
"Okay, I understand." You sighed into the receiver.
Although you desired his company more than anything else within that moment, you honestly did understand. This was Serj's career, his future, and everything he had ever worked for. Scheduling more concerts would only increase the joy and comfortability within his life, you had just wished it wouldn't effect you so poorly. It would only make things worse for the male if he rejected such an amazing offer.
"I really am sorry, honey. This is not what I wanted at all. You know I love you more than any of this." He explained.
Although you felt rather upset within that moment, you were aware of the fact that his declaration was completely honest. On multiple occasions, the musician had offered to quit everything for you, to acquire a normal job and live an average life. But you had always rejected such an outrageous idea. Just like Serj wanted what was best for you, you had desired the best for him, and you knew that becoming a famous musician would only advance and improve his future.
"Okay." You paused whilst deeply inhaling, your breath quivering as you hesitated "I love you, Serj."
The line was silent for a moment as the male perceived your shaking breath. However, he knew there was nothing he could do for you within that event, other than display any form of comfort and reassurance.
"I love you too, (Y/N)." The musician responded, his tone sincere and his voice full of complete care.
Maybe its because you were aware of the fact that this would be the last time you ever uttered those words to your lover, but as soon as the sentence escaped your lips, your heart basically shattered.
You quickly hung up the phone, practically slamming it down upon the table before completely falling apart. Your back slammed against the wall before you began to slide down until your body encountered the ground. As soon as the entire situation and the current predicament you were face with became a reality, you began to historically sob. Burning tears erupted from your vision as you cried into your palms, attempting to muffle your pain filled sobs against your skin.
A few months later, Serj finally returned home. After basically ditching his band members and skillfully avoiding the paparazzi within the airport, the male practically raced home.
"(Y/NNNNNN)." The male sang, his voice filled with pure love and enthusiasm as he opened the front door.
The musician had been so excited to return home to you; all he could think about for the past few days was getting on a plane and ultimately being reunited with you. He had day dreamed about collecting you within his arms, sharing a passionate kiss, and sobbing against each others skin as the two of you were finally reunified once more.
However, all of his previous anticipation and excitement completely vanished as his greeting was met with nothing but silence.
"(Y/N)?" Serj repeated, his body suddenly filled with worry and nervousness as the previous joy escaped from his voice.
The front door slammed behind the man as he was met with the view you had previously greeted every single day for the last couple months. The house was completely empty, silent, and upsettingly dark.
Once Serj had dropped his ample amount of bags by the entrance, he began to venture throughout every room located within the house. As his eyes met each area, he quickly noticed how empty each room had appeared. Everything that was deemed personally yours had vanished, and each of Serj's own items still remained. Once he noticed the lack of decorations and items you had favored, he quickly discovered that you had left, and in the process of doing so, you had taken all of your possessions along with you.
Once the male entered the final area, the kitchen, he discovered a small note situated upon the dinning table. As his eyes skimmed each line, his tears made it harder and much more difficult for him to continue reading.
The letter was written in black ink, and the penmanship had obviously belonged to you. The contents within the note informed him of the fact that you will always love him so much, more than anything in the entire world, but you must leave for your own sake. You could no longer spend almost the entirety of your years alone and without him. He was your soulmate and all you desired was to be with him every chance you could. You wished him luck regarding his career, informed him of the fact that you would be sitting behind the screen or listen to the radio every time one of his interviews or songs was being broadcasted. You finally concluded your letter with a final, heart wenching statement:
"Maybe we will be reunited when the time is right. Or maybe our paths will cross in another life. But all I know is that our time is not now. I love you so much, more than you will ever know, Serj."
The letter was completely finished when you signed your name at the bottom:
"Yours always, (Y/N)"
He quickly discovered your engagement ring abandoned upon the counter beside the note. The piece of jewelry was no longer glimmering within the sunlight, like it had previously done, it now appeared dull and lifeless whilst located within the dimly illuminated kitchen.
Before he could even think, the male ventured quickly towards the home phone. His fingers worked swiftly as he dialed your personal number with excessive haste before listening to the line ring. The phone rang and chimed for a few seconds, before he was greeted with an automated message, informing him that this number was no longer in active use.
As the receiver escaped his grasp and clattered upon the counter, it was as if Serj's whole body had completely shut down. The male slid against the wall behind him until his lower body encountered the ground. You had disappeared from within his life once more.
You were not executing some sort of practical joke upon the man, you had actually left. And once the male realized the seriousness of the situation, he began to historically cry, his heart aching within his chest. He brought his palms up to his face, concealing both his eyes and mouth in order to dry his tears and muffle his sobs of pain.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming