#selfrealizations

it’s only dawned on me within a short amount of time. that part i can be a bit proud of, but the part that comes next is where i don’t know what is all going to be going on. one thing i must accept:there is no going back to who i was before the accident. i haven’t had a concussion since may 27th, 2015. seven years. and i have one. my tenth concussion. and i didn’t pay much attention to it at…

right now, i cannot determine where this elevated anxiety originates. is it from the cocktail of synthetic chemicals, time released into my body throughout the day, or is it more simple? is it the disruptive, obnoxious noise and altercations that follow? deep down, i know that i should not search for the origin, but focus on alleviating the shifting season, demon racing, unmindful frustration…

fantasies & nail polish

i remember when my mom would paint my nails growing up. i wasn’t allowed to do it on my own for such a long time. my dad would be watching tv, my mom and i each reading a book. she’d be holding a cigarette, a glass budweiser bottle not too far away. i can still have that bird’s eye view of me cuddled up next to her on the green/brown/red strangely stitched couch. i’d be reading about dragons and…

she skips, she runs but she doesn’t run away she’s settling her pain tragically beautiful in every single way she smiles, she laughs and has that glow beneath her exterior we’ll never know