#selfblog

When you think of the word “journey”, what comes to your mind? Is it that backpacking trip through Europe you’ve yearned for? Is it relocating yourself or your family in order to live your best quality of life? Is it something that feels abstract, distant, and only worthy of dreaming? I hate to say it, but you’re slightly wrong to put the word “journey” in a box. Merriam-Webster states that a journey is “something suggesting travel or passage from one place to another,” with an example noting “a journey from youth to maturity.” So a journey, does not only dictate a physical place, however it can also represent an abstract idea or notion or plan.

Too often people dim their shine by frowning upon the idea that they haven’t experienced or “journeyed” enough in life.

But open your eyes: Life is a journey!

With all it’s wondrous flips, turns, and dead ends it’s the best rollercoaster you’ve ever been on. Stop selling yourself short, you’ve been journeying this entire time.

Yes, yes I understand that you want to see the world and all of it’s the seven wonders but be patient my child.

What journey are you on right now? Are you finishing that painstaking degree that feels to never end? Are you carrying, creating and loving a child internally? Did you just put more energy into that special hobby of yours to maybe turn it into a side gig? Did you start writing again, perhaps you’ll produce a manuscript! Are you a newlywed couple trying to figure out how the adult world works with joint bills, accounts, and maybe a rescue dog?

It sounds silly, I get it but the point is you have been on a journey this entire time and you are always a step away from beginning new ones. They may not be the journeys that your soul is aching for but they are stepping stones to get to where you want to be. Treat each journey like a mini achievement or a proper push in your sail.

My journey is this blog. My journey is having the courage to spill my thoughts and send out my vibes.

What’s your journey?

i'm broke so i can't go to many paid events. Discord and group chats are hugely stressful and difficult for me. I've met a couple of other transfems after meetups but i guess i didn't do well enough to make them want to hang out more. Is that really all people mean when they say community?

A letter for you Jaymee. - 12 / 27 / 2022

The year is about to end, and it's been a tough year for you. You faced a lot of challenges, I know. You were known as the caring, loving, and affectionate "ate" or "manang" to all. But, Hi, Jaymee! If I asked you how you were, would you answer me honestly? I guess not. Are you okay? Oh damn, I just remembered that you hated that question. But it's okay; it's understandable. As I always say to you and others, you are not obliged to explain to yourself whatever you feel now, tomorrow, or whenever. But, WOW! I'm so amazed, wherever you are right now. Remember the tough times? When you're on the verge of giving up when you're at a loss for words and about to lose it, You lost her at that time, but you couldn't feel anything. You woke up thinking how bad you were as a friend, and you questioned yourself about why she was there when you needed her and you weren't there when she needed you the most. People asked you about what happened, but you just can't speak. Remember those days? You tried so hard to hold yourself together so that no one would see you fall apart. You tried to love yourself and hate it at the same time. You have been hearing voices in your head, and most of the time, they are more credible than yourself. The pressure is everywhere; I know it's hard, and it takes years to fix a broken soul, and you're still bleeding inside. I know, but you survived; you chose to live. You choose to fight. You meet people who help you and make your life a little less complicated. I know you were thankful, and, hey, I'm so proud of you. You made it this far, Padayon. 

Comments