DIGITAL DIARY || 11.06.2024
Life has been a roller coaster ride these past months. I can't say that I'm really okay, though I do have my better days. I may seem tough and strong, but in reality, I often run away. I play hide and seek until I find myself again because I'm too scared I might not handle things anymore. Sometimes, I get overwhelmed by everything happening to me, so distracted that I almost forget who I am or who I was.
Building yourself isn't easy, and it doesn’t always turn out how you imagined. Recently, I've been moving too fast, which made me exhausted, and I forgot to pause, take a deep breath, and remember that it's okay to take things slowly.
I became so overwhelmed that I forgot the principles I made for myself to protect my heart. I let myself be happy and vulnerable again. But one day, someone pointed out how I had changed, and it made me feel bad about myself. It felt like reality slapped me in the face. I wanted to run away but couldn't. I wanted to understand things, but my brain and heart weren’t functioning well. I felt like I lost myself again, the person who always valued her emotions.
The smile I recently found is now slowly fading, and I'm starting to wear a mask to hide my emotions. But I’m grateful it happened because it reminded me that I am the artist of my own life. While rushing my strokes, trying to feel better, I realized I need to step back and see the wide perspective of what I am creating. That, I need to make sure I'm still doing it right.












