#sciamachy

Trees lined along the street, all of them with the exact same distance to the next. No trash could be found on the street or the sidewalks. Kids rode their bicycles in the distance while others played hopscotch on the sidewalk, laughing and cheering.

You turned your head to the side, staring out of the window to your new home. Lush green bushes almost hid the pristine white fence surrounding the neatly kept lawn. A straight path led up to the porch and to the evenly white front of the house.

The dream for every newly wed couple.

So lost in thoughts you barely noticed how the door of the passenger side got opened and Hoseok stepped into your view, smiling brightly. You blinked a few times to focus on him, silently waiting for him to say something.

“Honey, don’t just sit there. Come out and look at the house.” He offered you one hand to help you out of the moving truck, showing the ever loving husband.

It took everything within you to keep the scowl from your face, instead nodding shortly and getting out of the truck with his help. You struggled to keep the facade of the doting wife - at least towards him. Yet the higher ups decided you two would make the perfect newly wed couple for this mission.

You grabbed a vase from the back of the moving truck and walked towards the front door of the house, only half aware of everything around you as your mind constantly drifted back to the day you learned about the mission.

~~~

You impatiently thrummed your fingertips on the table top. After you got called to the unscheduled meeting, you immediately got out of your work space and rushed to the room. Apparently not all participants had the same work ethic as you, taking their time to finally arrive.

The scowl on your face only deepened when Hoseok waltzed into the room with a bright smile - not even apologising for being late. Ever since he started working at the agency - excelling at absolutely everything with ease - you couldn’t stand him. His ever so cheery persona kind of spooked you and you just knew you had to be careful around him. One of the reasons you stayed clear of him unless absolutely necessary.

“Wonderful! Everyone’s here now!” Your boss clapped in his hands and motioned to the slide show he prepared, briefing everyone in the room about the situation.

A smuggler ring had settled down in the suburbs of your city, using the appearance of a happy family to hide their illegal business. 

Due to this - quite effective way - the agency had barely any intel on the smuggler ring. Most of the information your boss showed felt more like guesses than proven facts. Therefore he had decided to start an undercover mission, hoping to get a lot more intel with this.

~~~

You stopped in front of the porch, staring up at the house with an empty expression. Even if you were a true newly wed couple you’d probably still dislike the house and garden with absolutely zero uniqueness to any of the other homes on this street.

“Isn’t it amazing?” Hoseok asked you as he stepped next to you, wrapping an arm around your middle and planting a kiss on your cheek. He leaned down to your ear and pulled you closer into his side. “The neighbours are watching”, he murmured - his tone of voice suddenly ice cold, “at least try to act like you’re excited to move here.”

You raised one hand to cup his cheek and turned around in his hold, plastering a sickly sweet smile on your lips. “Can’t your wife be too stunned with this dreamlike change?”

You felt the tick of a muscle in his jaw as his cold eyes ever so slightly narrowed. He stared at you for a moment longer before his cheery persona took over again. Hoseok squeezed you once more and let you go, running back to the moving truck to get more stuff.

Your eyes followed him until he got hidden by the truck. Only then you felt able to breathe again, turning back to the house. You didn’t bother checking who of the neighbours had been watching as you walked towards the house, opening the door and vanishing inside.

With every house looking identical on this street, you thought the layout would be pretty much the same as well. You wandered around the empty rooms, making mental notes of doors and windows. 

While you roamed the house more agents dressed as workers from a moving company arrived. They helped Hoseok carry all the boxes and furniture into the house. You didn’t have to tell them where to bring all the stuff since everything got decided prior at the meeting.

You neither bothered pretending to guide the workers, choosing to go to the top floor instead. You walked to a window inside the master bedroom, silently observing the area. 

Two men came out of the house to your right, chatting with each other and even waving towards Hoseok, who carried another box into the house. He stopped and placed the box on the ground, greeting them as well. You watched them having a short conversation before they continued to be on their way.

Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook. Except for a parking ticket here and there they had nothing suspicious about them. At least on paper.

You turned your attention to your left after hearing a dog bark. A man with a brown toy poodle walked down the sidewalk. The second he noticed the moving truck a scowl settled on his face. He stopped momentarily in front of the house next door, eyeing the workers with suspicion. His gaze wandered to your house until his eyes landed on you.

Unsure what to do, you simply stood there meeting his eyes. Only after Hoseok came out of the house again and greeted him, did he look away. He didn’t greet back though and simply walked into his home, shutting the door behind him.

Except for his profession as a piano teacher and him having a dog, you knew nothing about Min Yoongi. Though this little encounter made you aware of being especially careful around him.

Lastly you turned your attention to the house opposite of yours. The target. You couldn’t see the lawn due to the trees that aligned the street and except for the windows on the ground floor all had drawn curtains, which would make observing quite hard.

According to your information, three people lived in that house. Kim Namjoon and his husband Kim Seokjin as well as his cousin Kim Taehyung, who frequently stayed over but had his own residence somewhere else.

“Any intel already?”

You jumped slightly, surprised Hoseok showed up behind you. “Not really”, you mumbled and shook your head, continuing to stare out of the window, “just to be careful around Min Yoongi. He noticed me up here.”

Hoseok hummed and stepped next to you, checking the surroundings for himself. “The Kims won’t make it easy for us, huh? Any idea how to get to them?”

“Once the agents leave we go to our neighbours and introduce ourselves with presents.” You sighed and turned to Hoseok. “Should we be able to enter their houses we need to hide a wiretap.”

Hoseok raised one of his eyebrows questioningly. “All of their houses?”

You nodded with a roll of your eyes. “Obviously. This is a neighbourhood and unless they are incredibly dense then they know what’s happening here.”

“Were you always that distrusting towards others?”

Without giving him an answer you pushed Hoseok aside, walking past him and back down to the ground floor. The last agents cleared out, nodding shortly towards you and Hoseok, who had followed you quietly.

“Guess, it’s showtime.” 

You rolled your eyes again and grabbed the little gifts the agency prepared, heading towards your main target: the Kims.

~~~

You had hoped the mission would have been done and dealt with within a few weeks or months at best but your hopes dwindled every time - especially after living with Hoseok for over six months already.

Outside of the house you two still presented the lovey-dovey newly wed couple but behind closed doors the atmosphere between you two resembled the tundra during its coldest season.

At least you became close friends with Jimin, Jungkook and Jin. Your little group would often meet up to chit chat or gossip and sometimes even Taehyung joined those meetings.

You also knew for a fact that Hoseok had become good friends with your neighbour Yoongi, often conversing with him from the porch during the evening.

The only person with no progress was Namjoon. Neither you nor Hoseok were able to get close to him, meaning you two were also unable to get more information about him. Though you had to admit you didn’t get much intel about the others as well.

They truly seemed like normal people living in the suburbs and some mommy drama was their highlight of the week.

“So, when will it be your turn, love?” 

You blinked several times, trying to process Jin’s question while Jimin and Jungkook stared at you with eyes as large as saucers. “Wha- What do you mean? When will what be my turn?”

“Be the main focus of our weekly mommy drama review.” Jin’s plump lips stretched into a smug grin as he raised an eyebrow. His gaze wandered down to your stomach and back up. 

Jungkook and Jimin followed his gaze as well, making you uneasy and hiding your stomach behind your hands. “I- no, Hoseok and I, we don’t-”

Jimin gasped loudly and grabbed Jungkook’s hand, clutching it hard enough so his knuckles turned white. “I thought you were just incredibly silent! But you haven’t had sex with your own husband?! For how long?!?”

“What?”

Both you and Jin asked loudly. Each of you for a different reason though. Jin was shocked about this revelation while you felt incredibly confused.

Jungkook snickered softly, waiting for Jimin to elaborate on his statement as soon as he noticed your confused expression. 

“Ah, we got several noise complaints from the previous neighbours because apparently they were able to hear us during sexy times.” 

You felt the heat rushing to your face, neck and ears, immediately knowing what Jimin was talking about. You had heard it too but as long as you moved to the other side of the house and kept your windows shut everything was fine. “Well, but, uhm, our bedroom isn’t towards your side of the house.”

“That’s what I told Jimin too”, Jungkook nodded, sharing a pointed look towards him.

“I know, I know!” Jimin waved his hands dismissively in front of his face. “And I believed that too. But your statement just now proves something else! When was the last time you had sex with Hoseok?”

You helplessly stumbled over your own words, knowing full well you never had anything physical with him - except for his cheek kisses.

“You don’t even remember?” Jin stared at you in disbelief, gently showing your side. “Shut up!”

“Okay, here is what you’re going to do, darling!”

“What?” You nearly choked on your own saliva, hearing Jimin’s determination. To your dismay he didn’t stop his explanation despite your resistance, telling you in excruciating detail how to move, what to do and what to say. Even demanding to meet up the next day again to hear every little detail of your night.

When Hoseok came back from his fake business job, you still sat at the kitchen table - the horrified expression never having left your features since the guys had gone.

“What’s wrong?”

As if you were in trance you turned your attention towards Hoseok, who stood at the entrance of the kitchen, staring at you quizzically. He still wore his suit and just loosened his tie.

“They’re expecting us to have sex.”

Hoseok choked on his own saliva, coughing violently while hitting his chest. “What? Where did that come from?” He looked at you, blinking away the tears in his eyes from the coughing fit.

“Apparently the walls are quite thin and our direct neighbours would hear if we had sex.” Your voice became smaller and smaller with each word. 

“Let’s move this conversation to the bedroom”, Hoseok suggested and immediately turned on his heels, heading towards the master bedroom. 

He got rid of his tie and shoes and paced along the room, while you trudged into the room and stopped in front of the large bed.

You only had one bed so all this time both of you had slept in it together. Though you built a barrier of pillows every night and kept as much distance towards Hoseok as possible. 

“Let’s just make some noises. I’m sure that will be enough.” Hoseok stopped pacing and nodded to himself. He then proceeded to change out of his working attire. “Start moaning or something.”

You sighed and started building the pillow barrier again. This was utterly ridiculous. Still, you moaned softly and added some whimpers here and there. Yet, it didn’t feel right or enough.

“Maybe we should do the real thing.”

“What?” You whipped around and stared at Hoseok in bewilderment. “You can’t be serious!”

Hoseok quickly raised his hands to deescalate the situation. “I didn’t mean together. Just, uh, masturbating. It would make the moaning more realistic.” He avoided eye contact and started rubbing his neck, desperately trying to cover up the redness spreading there.

“Probably.” You sighed and sat down on your side of the bed, closing your eyes to think this through. “Can’t we just play some porn with full volume?”

“Not using our voices? Really?” Hoseok clicked with his tongue. “Just be professional about this. We have to keep this masquerade going at all costs. It’s not like neither of us has ever heard someone else masturbate. We’ll just do it underneath our blankets. If you have toys, use them.”

“Fine.” You grabbed your sleep wear and walked off into the connected bathroom. As soon as the door closed behind you, you crouched down on the floor and hid your face into your knees. This shouldn’t be such a problem but something about this didn’t sit right with you. Knowing you’d pleasure yourself with him next to you made you incredibly nervous. And you didn’t understand why - after all you didn’t even like Hoseok.

When you emerged from the bathroom again, Hoseok was already sitting on his side of the bed - lower half covered by his blanket. He leaned against the headrest with his bare back, one arm crossed over his chest while he scrolled through his phone. 

You stilled when he looked up at you, his eyes roaming over your bare legs and up towards the large shirt that barely covered the top of your thighs. “Ready?”

You only nodded and climbed into the bed as well, turning to your nightstand and pulling the lowest drawer open. Next to a secured box, where your gun was placed, you had a small bag with two of your favourite toys. You pulled them out and closed the drawer again, hiding the toys underneath the blanket next to you.

Your heart pounded heavily against your ribcage and your hands quivered as you shimmied out of your panties. You exhaled sharply and grabbed the vibrator. 

Nervously, you glanced towards Hoseok. You could only see his face, shoulders and upper chest as the rest was hidden from your sight due to the pillow barrier. Though he would be able to see you. Hoseok didn’t look into your direction yet you still turned on your side and away from him.

As you turned on the vibrator you winced slightly, feeling as if the buzzing was way too loud. You closed your eyes and moved the vibrator towards your core, pressing it against your clit. A jolt of pleasure soared through your body but vanished just as quickly since your mind constantly reminded you of Hoseok’s presence. You bit down on your lip as a mixture of pleasure and uncertainty spread through your veins.

Hoseok exhaled shakily. He hadn’t thought the tiny whimpers that escaped your lips would affect him that much. His dick laid heavy on his lower stomach, pulsating and twitching with each little sound that came from you. He turned his head to look at you, noticing how stiff you were.

“Hey, Y/N”, he spoke softly and turned towards you, removing some of the pillows. “Let me help?”

You didn’t dare to look at him, quickly trying to blink away the tears of frustration. Instead you only nodded and laid on your back again. 

His long fingers danced across your thigh until they reached your hand with the still running vibrator. Hoseok gently pried the toy out of your hand as he kneeled next to your lower body. He tentatively pulled your blanket away, checking your expression every other second. “Tell me to stop as soon as I’m overstepping.”

You whimpered at his soft but clear tone and nodded once again, hiding your face behind your arms now. 

The second Hoseok had removed your blanket, his hands landed on your knees and pushed your legs apart, revealing your glistening folds. He kept your legs apart and moved the vibrator over your folds, making you twitch. 

Soon enough you couldn’t hold your moans back in, letting them increase in volume as well as your curses and whines. The sparks of pleasure shot through your body like little bursts of electricity. 

Hoseok pressed the vibrator against your clit and used something else to run over your wet entrance. You gasped once he passed it and pushed deep into your pussy. At first you thought it to be your dildo but once Hoseok curled his fingers inside of you, pressing against the rough patch, you knew it were his fingers. This knowledge spiked your pleasure even more and you arched your back, crying out loud. 

“Fuck, Hoseok, oh my god, please, please, oh shit, shit, shit.” You had your eyes wide open but you couldn’t see a thing, your body thrashed under the onslaught of pleasure as Hoseok continued to fuck his fingers into you. 

A scream ripped through your throat as you came hard onto his fingers. You sagged back into the mattress, spent from the orgasm and heavily breathing. 

Hoseok turned off the vibrator and placed it on the ground next to your bed - same with the dildo he found under the blanket. He was about to get out of bed when you stopped him.

“What about you?” You looked up at him with glazed eyes, holding on to his pinky finger with no strength at all. 

“I’m fine.”

You shook your head and softly pulled at his hand, indicating he should lie down next to you. “Please.”

Hoseok couldn’t deny your request and crawled next to you. He watched you silently as you pushed his blanket away, turned on your side and grabbed his arm to pull him with you until he spooned you. His initial confusion vanished the second you pressed your ass against his hard cock. “One sec”, he mumbled and removed his boxers. He pushed his hard on between your thighs, the mess he had created between your legs being the perfect lubrication.

You clenched your thighs experimentally and immediately received a groan from Hoseok behind you. “If you’re doing that I won’t even last a second”, he mumbled into the skin on your neck, placing a kiss on there right afterwards. Another groan left his lips when you clenched your thighs again. Hoseok wrapped his arms around your upper body, keeping you in place, as he started thrusting. 

Your own moans got mixed with his groans as he kept hitting your sensitive clit with the head of his dick. 

“Shit, you sound so fucking hot. I could get drunk on your moans and whimpers alone. Fuck, let me hear you, let me hear how good I make you feel.” 

As you cried out his name, Hoseok released his load. White spurts of cum covered your shirt and thighs, the warm, sticky liquid slowly descending down on the sheets.

Neither of you moved or said a word for a while, simply basking in the after sex bliss.

“You wanna sleep on my side of the bed tonight?” Hoseok asked with a teasing lilt to his voice, gently pulling you closer against his chest.

“Yes, please.” 

He pressed a kiss to your shoulder and pushed himself up. “Let me clean you first though.”

You tried pushing yourself up as well. “I can help.”

Hoseok simply shook his head and hurried to the connected bathroom. He came back with wet wipes, gently cleaning you. He even helped you out of your shirt - careful so you wouldn’t smear his cum anywhere - before he cleaned himself.

Only a few minutes later both of you laid on his side of the bed, cuddled together. He held you in his arms, legs tangled together and his chin on top of your head. You quietly listened to his heartbeat and slowly got lulled to sleep.

“If you’re going to gossip about this tomorrow with the drama kings of our neighbourhood”, Hoseok spoke softly, “tell them I’m big.”

You snorted and gently hit his chest. “You are big! Don’t make it sound like you’re not.”

Hoseok chuckled lowly and wrapped his arms even tighter around your body. “What are you going to tell them though?”

“That it worked.”

“That what worked?”

“Jimin told me to do a lap dance for you. He described every move in great detail. If it weren’t for Jin he would have probably shown me with the help of Jungkook.” 

“Try it tomorrow”, Hoseok snickered, “let's see whether it actually works.”

You giggled tiredly. “Tomorrow it’s getting back to our mission.” You didn’t notice how Hoseok tensed momentarily before he agreed.

~~~

Over the next few weeks you noticed a change in Hoseok. On the outside he became much more clingy and touchy, using absolutely every chance to hug you, hold your hand or even place a kiss on your skin. Yet, inside the house he avoided you as much as possible - even leaving for work early and only coming back late into the night. Sometimes you weren’t even sure he slept in the bed anymore.

While a tiny part within your head was concerned about his behaviour, the vast majority of your mind pushed that voice to the back and focused on the mission. 

You sat on the bedroom floor with dozens of notes strewn around you. After all this time you discovered Namjoon worked in a private clinic as a doctor while Jin owned a chain of restaurants. Lastly, Taehyung was a social worker. And somehow all three of them had to be involved with smuggling. You rubbed your eyes tiredly, glancing at your alarm clock to see it was way past midnight already. With a deep sigh you pushed yourself up and cleaned the floor, hiding all the notes in the secret drawer underneath your weapon.

Right as you were about to close the drawer all the lights vanished, leaving you in the dark. You stilled momentarily and listened to your surroundings. You grabbed your gun when you heard some shuffling downstairs.

With silent steps you walked towards the window, hiding away from the moonlight. You didn’t see anything out of the ordinary despite the missing lights on the whole street.

Your attention turned back inside the house when you heard steps ascending the stairs. You hurried towards the door, standing beside it and holding your gun ready. Dark clouds moved in front of the moon and hid you away in complete darkness.

Someone stopped in front of the door and you prayed your beating heart wouldn’t be as loud as you thought it was. You leaned closer, getting a whiff of an unfamiliar scent through the small opening of the door.

The door opened and someone stepped into the room. Without hesitation you charged forward and pressed your gun against their head. “Don’t move or I’ll blow your skull away.”

“Woah, woah, woah, it’s me!”

Only after moonlight shone back into the room and showed Hoseok’s shocked expression did you lower your gun and step back. “Where were you?”

“Not important. What happened to the electricity?”

You crossed your arms in front of your chest. “Where. Were. You.”

“Just out, it’s not important.” Hoseok tried to deflect once again.

You stepped closer to him, tapping the tip of your gun against his chest. “I’m not asking again.” You caught that unfamiliar, flowery scent as you inhaled. Your hand started trembling from the thoughts racing within your mind. You pressed your gun against his chest. “Are you cheating on me?”

“What?”

“What?”

“No!” Hoseok placed his hands on yours with the gun, slowly pushing it down. “How could I cheat on you? We’re not even married! Anyway, do you really think I would risk blowing the mission for a fling?”

You dropped your arm, staring blankly at the ground. He was right. What were you thinking? “Right”, you mumbled and turned away, moving towards your nightstand. You tensed the muscles in your jaw, hoping to prevent your emotions from taking over. Even though you didn’t fully understand why you felt conflicted at the thought of Hoseok having someone else.

You tried shaking those thoughts and feelings but even days after that night they haunted your consciousness. 

“What’s on your mind, love?” Jin nudged your side, noticing you haven’t been present throughout the whole conversation.

A pout formed on your lips and you pulled your legs to your chest. “Why is it always you calling me out?”

The guys laughed heartily. Jimin even threw himself over Jungkook’s lap from the force. “It’s just that your feelings are like an open book to read. So what is it?”

You leaned back on Jin’s couch, sighing deeply while your eyes wandered around the living room. Before you could even stop yourself, you opened your mouth to say: “I think Hoseok is cheating on me.”

All eyes were on you, various expressions of shock painting their faces. 

“You’re messing with us, right?” Jungkook leaned forward, disbelief written all over his features. “He’s so lovey-dovey with you. Honestly, not even I am as head over heels for Jimin as this guy is for you!”

Jimin punched his shoulder before he moved over to your side, wrapping his arms around you to console you. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. Do you have any proof though?”

You smiled sadly and shook your head. “Not really, just a feeling and the scent of a perfume of some sorts I picked up on him a few nights ago.”

“This calls for something stronger than tea”, Jin announced and stood up. He walked over to a cupboard and pulled several shot glasses out of it. Jungkook quickly got up as well, helping Jin and grabbing some of the alcohol too. As they returned Jimin poured the liquid to all of you and handed the shot glasses around.

You stared at the glass in your hand for a moment before you placed it back on the table. “If it’s alright with you I’d rather get myself a glass of water.”

“Are you sure?”

You nodded and got up, motioning Jin to sit down again. “I’ll be back in a bit, no worries.” You took a deep breath once you reached the kitchen. It annoyed you that this issue kept bugging you this much. You shook your head, you had to focus on the mission.

Your eyes roamed around the kitchen. Two weeks after your mission started, Jin had invited you to his home and you had used the chance to hide a wiring device inside the kitchen. So far it didn’t give you any intel though. Maybe it was about time to remove the device again. You leaned against the kitchen sink, staring at it deep in thought.

“Is it true what you said to the others? I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation.” Taehyung appeared behind you, tilting his head to one side. “Are you planning on doing anything about it?”

You turned towards him. “I wouldn’t know what to do about it. I don’t even know whether I’m right or not.”

Taehyung cornered you against the sink, hands caging you in. “You could always get back at him.” He brushed a strand of hair out of your face, cupping your cheek in the process. 

“Get back at him? Are you saying I should cheat on my husband?” You tilted your head and crossed your arms in front of your chest. “Also who would be willing to break the rules of matrimony with me?”

Taehyung smirked and leaned closer into you. “Maybe someone closer than you’d think.”

You scoffed and shook your head. “Why do I have the feeling you’re talking about yourself, mister? Are you someone willing to break rules? Going against the current, huh?”

“What if that were the case?”

You hummed softly and placed your hand on his chest. “I’d wonder how far you would go. What are you willing to do?”

Taehyung chuckled lowly. “Only one way to find out.”

“Or you’ll just answer my questions”, you offered. 

Taehyung shrugged with his shoulders, tilting his head to the side again with a smirk, silently telling you to try and find out.

“Would you join an illegal street race?” You waited for him to answer before you asked the next question. “Would you take illegal substances? Or smuggle those?”

“That was two questions at once.”

“And you answered neither of them.”

“I’m actually hoping for you to ask the good questions now.”

You scoffed: “Like what?”

“Whether I’d kiss a married woman.”

Your eyes widened ever so slightly but you kept your composure. “Would you?” You felt your heart pounding within your throat yet your voice wasn’t much louder than a whisper.

Before Taehyung could answer you or do something the silence of the house got disrupted by excessive ringing of the doorbell.

“Hoseok?!” Jin asked in surprise as he opened the door, unable to say anything else before he got pushed to the side.

You glanced over Taehyung’s back towards the entrance of the kitchen. When Hoseok appeared at the door, eyes furiously roaming around the kitchen until they landed on you, made you shrink down behind Taehyung.

“What’s going on?” Jimin, Jungkook and Jin appeared behind Hoseok, switching glances between Hoseok and Taehyung. 

You quickly used the chance to sneak out behind Taehyung and walked over to Hoseok. Your focus switched between his eyes, desperately trying to understand his motive. “Why are you here?” You grabbed one of his hands, uncurling his fist and playing with his fingers. “Did something happen?”

He glared over your shoulder towards Taehyung. Only after several deep breaths did he focus on you. “We’re going home. Now.” Hoseok didn’t wait for your answer. Instead he pulled you along and past the guys. He didn’t look back, ignoring the calls behind him.

Once you reached your house and he slammed the door shut behind you, you ripped your hand out of his hold. “What is wrong with you? Do you understand you could have blown the mission just now?”

“I don’t care about the mission!” 

You jumped back, surprised by the volume Hoseok used. You never witnessed Hoseok being angry and right now he appeared to be furious.

“How could I just sit back, hearing this bastard making a move on my woman?!” 

“Nobody knows you were able to hear us!” You ran your hands through your hair in frustration. “Also why would you even get like this when we’re not even a real married couple?”

“Because I fucking love you for gods sake!”

Your jaw dropped and you stared at Hoseok with wide eyes. “What?” You closed your mouth again, swallowing audibly and blinking several times. “If you’re trying to mess with me, this is not funny.”

“I swear to…” - Hoseok grabbed his hair and pulled at its strands, groaning in frustration - “I am NOT joking, Y/N!”

“Why?”

“Are you really asking me why I fell in love with you?” Hoseok shook his head as he closed the distance between you two. “You’re driving me insane, Y/N. Do you really need me to count all of the reasons I discovered over the time we’re living together?”

“What? 

Hoseok grabbed your hands, squeezing them with desperation. “I love you, Y/N. Please. I love the scowl you make when you’re annoyed. I love the twinkle in your eyes when you’re excited about something. I love the way you make a little dance when you taste something delicious. I love the way you stick out your tongue when you’re concentrating on something.”

Tears gathered at the corners of your eyes. You felt your hands trembling even though Hoseok held them so tightly. “But I’m just part of the mission. I thought you stayed out so long because you actually met your loved one.”

“I stayed out trying to forget about my feelings for you at first. I wanted the mission to come first. I wanted to stay professional. So I followed Namjoon first and later Taehyung, who went to a strip club a few nights ago.”

“Are you crazy? They could have seen you!”

Hoseok laughed softly and shook his head. “I am crazy, yeah. Crazy for you. Crazy enough to question whether I want this mission to end or just keep living like this for the rest of our lives.”  He cupped your cheeks and wiped a few stray tears away. “Maybe we should come up with an explanation for the mess I created though tomorrow morning.”

You clutched his shirt, softly laughing through your tears. “You’re an idiot”, you sniffled as you pulled him down to kiss you. 

“I completely agree”, he mumbled against your lips, wrapping his arms around your body and holding you close to himself. “But it’s worth it.” He smiled into the kiss, giddy as you hummed in agreement.

© all rights reserved  

‘Y/N?’ It is spiteful how doubtful the repeating of the name sounds in the ears, merely forming a sliver of the self-loathing felt in this very instance, standing opposite each other as little more than strangers. ‘The monster- I can’t think- my mind is- I’m-’

A gentle kiss breaks off the incoherent rambling that was going nowhere, nails raking over quickly warming skin, the simple touch enough to be spurred on to undertake action and desperately wanting to do so at the notice of dark jeans suddenly getting quite tight. Unfortunately, it is nothing but an unintentional effect as she actually reaches for the shirt, helping with putting it on. ‘It’s alright, Kookie. You suffered trauma, but we’re gonna get you help. And I’m with you every step of the way. We’ll work it out.’ The hand running through cherry locks brings immense comfort, soothing the wild thoughts that have been racing through the mind, changing human sanity into a beastly incomprehensible version of itself. Leaning into the touch, a relaxed chuff slowly flows over into a purr when the sweet scent of familiar skin comes into direct contact with mine when the affectionate touch moves from hair to the right cheek, once more cupping it lovingly in a small palm. ‘Come on, let’s go home.’

One bite, that’s all it takes to bind you to me. If I’m fast, it is possible. We’re humans, not animals. Although, you look tasty as well. What is happening? So easy, so fragile. No, no, no! You’re just a human, unfit to carry pups. I’m not a monster. But you smell so good, would take my knot so well, look lovely filled with cum.

A sharp sting halts the conflict within, the painful throbbing in the odd location of nails, a sensation akin to razors feeling as if it wants to burst forth from beneath the flesh, fueling the anguish beginning to stir within. Nowhere is a trace of normalcy to be found in the current posture, the tongue tip gliding over the, fortunately still hidden, canines that have apparently protruded not lying in its findings. Slowly but surely the demon is taking over, twisting reality in a manner that was formerly deemed impossible yet now has to be believed since the truth is lived. There is no other explanation because, surely, no legal medication can have side-effects like these.

The mirror hanging opposite the bed set against the padded alabaster wall shows the reflection that has been staring back for a while: the creature that forms the cause for this hell, crimson eyes looking back amused, before reverting to an exact copy of myself though the colour of the gaze never changes directly.

The first time it happened, the shock had feet scramble backwards and body and mind cower in fear in the corner of the tiny bathroom until a nurse came rushing in after hearing the ruckus of the shelves that found their demise in the futile retreat to safety, bringing common sense back with reason. Y/N was likely informed about the accident the moment she arrived to selflessly spend yet another day at the hospital instead of going to work at the counselling office, told to tread carefully in the way of words and attitude even though it was no new knowledge as a psychiatrist. Withal, she was extra gentle and continuously checking whether there were any changes, mentally or physically, that could expose more about the current condition. The beloved woman may be a specialist in mental distress, but personal interference with unknown aspects of the field or the risk of letting work seep into private life prevents the professional from coming out to give a proper diagnosis. Howbeit, unconsciously or not, being in her company worked miracles and brought the safety of home to the strange territory.

Stare focused on the reflection mockingly changing into a realistic image, the savage thoughts lead behaviour as the palm formed around the cheek is swiftly forced to rest in a lower hardened region, hips instinctively rolling against the hand, growling in pleasure at the friction.

‘Kook, I get you missed me, but-‘ An attempt at stopping the amazing crazy-driving grinding is halted by a firm grip around the feeble wrist, a soft gasp of disbelief accompanying the confusion crept into a familiar face. ‘What are you doing? Kook, you’re hurting me. Stop.’

You’d look so gorgeous right here on the ground, on all fours, ass high, those teary eyes rolled back, whining for an alpha cock like a good bitch.

‘I did miss you. Too much.’ The loneliness which was lived and increased in the nights after the visits, when the abomination was the only companion, is gratefully lifted from the shoulders weighed down by it at last. Lips forcefully meet, canines biting down in a trembling lower lip, crimson droplets welling up from the marks left behind. The tongue cheekily runs over the tiny wounds, the tang of iron intoxicating and coaxing out a sound between a purr and a growl. One more kiss fueling the drunkenness before making a trail of rapid pecks to the side of the mouth, past the delicate jaw where they linger more and to the pulse at the side of the warm throat, biting the skin and licking the pain away.

One bite. I need to stop. But killing you right here is tempting. Why am I even thinking about that? Such easy prey. Fuck, you’re everything to me. No, maybe you are fit to carry my offspring. Just one bite.

Hesitant hands are trapped between chests, one raised to a feverish temperature, when they are finally let go of, mine finding a strong hold on the waist of the girl that was desperately wished for each night. We could have watched the pale moon grow fuller and the stars shine brightly in a crisp clear navy sky above the city skyline, lullabies bringing the calm slumber she deserves with all the stress of the situation, but there was no one there. Nothing except a trace of Hell crippling the mind in an endeavour to create a new animal, a likeness that is still fighting back, not yet nor ever ready to willingly surrender.

Withal, disregarding the efforts to resist, it is the inevitable truth that the creature has already influenced and shaped the self. Because somewhere along the way, those innocent wishes turned into primal desires and the mornings continued where the nights had left off, trying to lessen the pain of wanting by acting before Y/N would be greeted by the same sight daily, probably ending up just as uncomprehending as me. Notwithstanding, thoughts wandered off to her in privacy after being amazingly distracted during the visits, though the scent of spring and occasional close innocent experience with skin made it difficult to stay focused even then.

Still, there is one thing that has remained the same: the need to be with my mate. Every awakening there is a panic, body acting by jumping out of the bed even with the slightest bit of conscience regained and frantically searching for the significant other in the hopes of finding them in a safe state, always ending up with concerned disappointment at the discovery she is not there. The nurses had some trouble at the beginning with calming the agitated nerves and prevent any possible escape, telling reassuring white lies that became almost completely true during visiting hours and Y/N dropped by. Those few moments of bliss, those precious seconds without interference from the monster, were always spent the same, even today on the day of homecoming: standing in complete silence as I hold her tightly, nose buried in locks smelling of sweet mint regardless of the prominent scent while trying to hold back the pleading whines that beg to be taken away from the hospital.

Human fingers still aching due to the something that wants to protrude from the flesh hastily try to undo the zippers of the jeans preventing the meeting of skin, but a sudden unusually firm push sends feet scrambling backwards, which causes a low growl to fall from lips which are disturbed in their hunger for the taste of blood, are deprived of the potential to place a mating bite on the fragile part where the neck meets the shoulder as I claim the beautiful girl now standing a few steps away with wide shocked eyes.

‘Don’t you want me? Is there some other alpha who’s pups you’d rather carry?’ Teeth grind as the corners of the mouth curl up in a snarl, voice reduced to a dangerously low pitch as hands mould into trembling fists. ‘Who’s bitch do you want to be if not mine?’

Then fangs retract and the red-veiled vision refocuses with a yelp on the spot where a hand pushes down strongly on the soft flesh to stop the bleeding of a deeper wound than the ones placed on the side of the throat.

I did that? Wh- what am I doing? Why am I talking like this? This isn’t me. I’m not a wolf nor is she. I’m not this abomination. I’d never behave like this. This isn’t me. It isn’t. Is it?

‘Y/N,’ the roles have reversed, the distance remaining the same with every advance and retreat until it is her who is backed into a corner and has to be assured of reality, ‘I don’t know- please, stay still. Baby, I don’t know what happened or w- why... I’m acting l-like this.’ Tears unwillingly begin to stream at the display of terror removing itself away from the hot-headed demon approaching it, attitude emitting the urge to flee, run to safety and never turn back.

Leaving me alone.

Speech is nothing but a whisper, the voice of prey knowing it is about to die yet unbelieving of the fact. The crack in it makes it even more pathetic. ‘You bit me. Injured me and enjoyed it.’

Stop thinking about her that way! She is not prey! She is... isn’t... is... need to kill... no... need to mate... no, no, no.

‘I- I’m s-‘ Feet halt and the body curls in on itself instinctively, head buried between tightly held knees as dimmed sobs shake the body. ‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I- I don’t wanna be this w-way, but I c- can’t help it.’

A small presence draws nearer, a hand coming to rest on the left knee and giving it a little shake, the familiar gesture of wanting attention to point something out or distract the mind from whatever it is occupied with. ‘Look at me.’ A change of tone, horrified anguish replaced with kind-hearted sternness although traces of the former emotions linger. ‘Hey, JK, look at me.’

There is no other choice but to do so when a blood-stained palm - the scent re-igniting that cruel inebriation once more yet can, fortunately, be held back with what little willpower is left - gently forces a meeting of gazes, one more confused than the other. But there is one frightening element to the gorgeous lady’s: the coldness of the professional that can never be fully omitted from the usually warm demeanour displayed in the office. ‘Don’t do this, Y/N. P-please don’t see me as one of your patients.’

‘I’m afraid I have to if I want to understand the situation. I want you to recover from this, but I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s going on, what you’re thinking.’ Another terror formerly unknown fully awakens within: being branded as a lunatic by the very woman that claims every thought, becoming another file in the archive despite the promise of keeping work and private life separate. The hurt the realization brings is mirrored in the equally frightened posture before me, digits placed on the sides of the face trembling lightly, breaths shorter and sharper. ‘I have to do this. Talk to me.’

‘You promised me you wouldn’t do this.’ A solemn shake of the head, trying to ignore the delicious tang of iron and disregard this turn of events. It is a promise we made when we started dating a year ago: whatever happened, public and private would be kept apart. ‘I don’t want you to see me as a patient.’

Sitting down properly with crossed legs, cherry locks are combed good-naturedly with the hand formerly placed on the knee, the gesture known to bring relaxation, especially after bad dreams, or strengthen the chances of successful persuasion. ‘Even if it helps in recovery?’

‘Even then.’ A deep breath in and out, thus steadying the ability to speak a bit more after repeating it a few times. Somewhat composed and enjoying the caressing, eyes close as conscience begins to border on the edge with its counterpart and talking transforms into hypnotized purring upon speaking further. ‘I need things to be- mmm, right, yes, that’s nice - normal between us. I know you’re a professional, but - don’t stop, I like you petting me there - I think- I think th- that’s the best... option.’ 

The sight of lazily opened eyes sharpens, focusing on Y/N with an expression of a pup that has been abandoned by its mother and is desperately searching for a new home. Hoping to convince her a bit, loving soft pecks are put on the pulse of the wrist enveloped in an instinctive whim, endeavouring to not graze the feeble skin with the fangs that have again protruded, while the affectionate caressing continues. ‘Let’s just go home. Let me be your hearth as I should be.’

A deep sigh tells signifies the pleading has been heard, cushiony lips against the forehead promising a true return to the shared apartment instead of being shipped off to the clinic, arms pulling us closer together swearing to never let go and mine doing the same when they pull her on the lap made available after a change in position. Nuzzling against the side of the neck, the aroma of summer makes all former fear slowly flow away.

The rapid intuitive lick, unable to have been stopped even if some kind of conscious warning had popped up, is tolerated although a tenseness momentarily stiffens the posture of the pretty prey before hesitantly returning to combing ruby hair with paradoxically steady digits. Occasionally the left temple is kissed as whispers of sweet nothings create a piece of home in the foreign lonely atmosphere that is only forgotten in her presence.

Nonetheless, the quickened heartbeat betrays the worry due to the needed resignation, disregarding of the provided comfort, and the warmth below ignited by even the slightest movement of adjustment has a whole different story to tell.