#school~

My friend got me a bunch of super nice pens and a notebook from Japan and I'm super happy because she is amazing and I can color code my notes and I love coco she's a sweet bean

The fact that I could end high school with a 4.4 gpa, full ib diploma, the bilingual stamp on my diploma, and possibly at one of my top choice schools is my motivation to take notes and get ahead over summer so I am less stressed and can focus more on the difficulties that will come than on learning everything at once

I did ok on my iop despite having to redo half of it the night before I had to do it. Definitely not the grades I was going for or would have gotten if I didn't have to change it but it's better than I expected.

I so badly wish that I could quit my job, but it's not for recreation anymore like I have to pay car insurance and for gas now, and whatever is left over goes towards my medical bills bc we have like $20k+ worth all bc of me and my family's financial state is trash :-) And now my grades are shitty and I don't have time to study more or catch up unless I want to lose any sleep that I am actually able to get. Like I dont want to blame everything on my job, bc I was the one who decided to do band/drumline on top of it, but my time is managed to the extreme level even w/o drumline now.

I really don't know what I am going to do about my extended essay. I have 3 weeks left to either get back 3 weeks of research plus more and write the essay or I have 3 weeks to find a new subject and write it. I don't know what to do and I broke down in front of now the 14th teacher who had said that he couldn't be my advisor for a different subject.

I feel like I have a pretty decent grasp on the foundation of fractal geometry considering it's written for a math major. Like I couldn't explain it but I get it kinda thing. And it is really interesting.