Note: Sexiest live-action characters, part thirteen. Haven’t done one of these in a while. I should also do more top ten lists for cartoon men and monsters.
10. valets (Martin Samuel and Stephen Dubeau) from Repo! The Genetic Opera
Amber Sweet is a good name for someone who surrounds herself with eye candy.
9. Michael Beck (David Burtka) from American Horror Story: Freak Show
Fem-dom? No, I’m into malesub. Get it right!
8. Royce Clayton (Craig Olejnik) from Thir13een Ghosts
I’ll show him to my sacred place- Wait. No. Wrong song, wrong movie.
7. Bobby (Jay Hernandez) from Thanksgiving
Gives head.
6. the Beast (Trevor Martin/Ken Marshall) from Krull
Shapeshifter whose modus operandi is to marry and impregnate the heroine.
5. Sam Dalmas (Tony Musante) from The Bird with the Crystal Plumage
Eats pussy.
4. Kirk Lane (Richard Harmon) from I Still See You
Bust Me Open 1,000 Times.
3. Tom Holloway (Michael Park) from Stranger Things 3
A dad who gets infested by and transformed into a monster.
2. Russell Lightbourne (JR Bourne) from The 100
Body snatcher daddy.
1. Ransom Drysdale (Chris Evans) from Knives Out
The real mystery is why Marta never thought about making him a sugar baby.
Note: Previous list. The joke is that Bobby was decapitated and Sam unintentionally ate a cat.
