#runnersmood

Just so you..today’s blog is going to be a little dramatic...feel free to read on for a front row seat to a runner’s mood swings...

Okay, so no part of me wanted to run today...I guess a small part of me did since I actually went; but the rest of me was dragging behind that small part. I have really putting effort lately into turning my eating, sleeping, and overall living habits around for more health conscious living. I haven’t been doing too badly either! 

Getting back into running is a whole other story...since I’m so darn competitive, it’s hard to give myself grace to start back. I almost feel like “why am I doing this...I used to be amazing, now I’m married...” Not saying in anyway marriage is bad, because it’s been the best year of my life...but that’s the point, I don’t want to run or exercise, I just want to be happy and in love at home. As a single person, I had more time to run. But who really wants to get out of bed when their husband is so sweetly sleeping beside them?? I’ve heard married people say this stage wears off (hope not but okay...-_-), if it does, all the more reason to savor these precious moments, right!? 

Another part of me is terrified of trying and giving my best effort again only to be injured and have to start all over again...I’m doing my best to avoid all causes of the injury, doing yoga, and trying to swim every so often. I guess today I felt like I’m never going to get back to the level I was at. I felt so amazing and I’m starting to feel that again with just changing diet, but this sucks...

I loved to run and I miss calling myself a runner...This time I’m not running to get the best time or be the best most fit person I know, I’m trying to run for me...and that’s hard. It was easier trying to win, trying to live is sorta hard. I guess I do need goals, I’m just not even motivated to make those...

So, it only goes up hill from here right?! Hope so...

Time- 22:20

Distance- 1.74 mi

Running buddy- Bear

Mood- can I please light speed myself to where I was before???I’m dying......not really.