Hey, sweetheart :)

I'm so sorry that you're in the situation you're in, and it sucks that not only is your boyfriend not supportive of your decisions, but his family is also involved as well. It doesn't make you feel good, does it? I'm sure your first response to what was going on was that you felt ganged up on. Rightfully so! It's not fair, and your boyfriend should talk to his family on the side and let them know that his relationship with you has nothing to do with them and even if it's not something he wants, they still shouldn't butt in.

If you're in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, figuring out the next step can be very difficult. You have feelings for this person and have developed a history with them. However, it's the future, not the past, that you should consider. Will you be happy with them? Will you be able to achieve your goals? Will you feel safe? Whatever decision you make, the most important thing is that it's the right thing for you (and hopefully him) in the long run.

Ending an unhealthy or abusive relationship is not like ending a healthy one. Your boyfriend may not accept the break up or respect your boundaries. They may try to control you through guilt trips, threats or insults. It may be very difficult to have a peaceful or mutual breakup with an abusive partner. Just know that as long as YOU are okay with the decision, it’s okay if your partner is not. If you're thinking of ending your relationship, consider these tips:

If you don’t feel safe, don’t break up in person. It may seem cruel to break up over the phone or by email but it may be the safest way.

If you break up in person, do it in a public place. Have friends or your parents wait nearby. Try to take a cell phone with you.

Don’t try to explain your reasons for ending the relationship more than once. There is nothing you can say that will make your ex happy.

Let your friends and parents know you are ending your relationship, especially if you think your ex will come to your house or confront you when you're alone.

If your ex does come to your house when you’re alone, don’t go to the door.

Trust yourself. If you feel afraid, you probably have a good reason.

Ask for help. Chat with a peer advocate who is trained and ready to answer your questions.

One by one replace your old routines with activities you never had time for. Here are some ideas:

Take a yoga class.

Reconnect with an old friend.

Get a new pet -- they’ll be glad you did!

Try out that recipe you found on Pinterest.

Take long walks and explore your neighborhood.

If you find yourself getting hung up on old memories, stay strong and remember how you felt when you made this decision. You don’t have to put up with that anymore and you can be fully in control of your own life again. Looks like the single life might not be so bad after all.

Hey love.

We still have your ask in our inbox! It’s one week old and almost at the bottom, so someone should get it shortly. :)