#rhodologies

40. Making a goofy face until they notice and laugh.

Shorter seems stressed.

Maybe that's a stupid thing to focus on. They're all stressed! Of course they are, after that harrowing phone call from Miss Jessica (or... more accurately, from the horrible man who attacked her, and god does even just thinking about that send a shudder down Eiji's spine).

But Max and Ash left to handle it. And despite all the fear churning in Eiji's gut, he knows they'll take care of it, and they'll be okay. Because... because all he and Ibe-san and Shorter can do is wait; they can't help from here, and so Max and Ash have to be okay.

So Shorter has an understandable reason to be stressed. And maybe it's stupid of Eiji to be worried about that, but it doesn't feel like he's just jittery and anxious and worried about Max and Ash or even Miss Jessica; sure, he's only known Shorter for a couple of weeks, but he gets the distinct feeling that if that was the case, Shorter would be pacing, or bouncing his legs and fidgeting, restless and thrumming with nerves.

Instead, he's still. Slow-moving. Lethargic. Like he's waiting, but he doesn't want time to go by at all, as if somehow the idea of Max and Ash's return (because what else would he be waiting for?) fills him with dread.

It's ... unnerving.

Eiji takes a deep breath. He's an older brother (even if Shorter is three weeks older than him and has been lording it over him ever since they compared birthdays), and one essential Nii-san skill he's picked up on is distraction. Whenever his little sister is scared or stressed about something out of her hands, like her high school entrance exams, the best way he's found to get her mind off it is challenging her at whatever video game they're both most into at the time.

And that's not exactly an option here, in the Dawson home without any game consoles or controllers, and going that far into distractions during a crisis of this magnitude feels disrespectful, but the idea can still apply, right? Shorter will feel less... burdened by dread, or whatever is bothering him, if he can think about something else even just for a second. Something to make him laugh, to lighten his mood.

So Eiji puffs out his cheeks and furrows his brow and scrunches up his face as much as he can, until his eyes are nearly squeezed shut, and then he pokes Shorter in the side.

Shorter jumps as if he's just heard a gunshot, hissing out a curse, and Eiji nearly gives up to apologize profusely when Shorter actually looks at him, opens his mouth to say something, closes it again, and then... chuckles.

But even then it's a weak chuckle. He sounds kind of nauseous. "Ha... good one, Eiji. Ya got me."

Eiji drops the funny face and reaches out with real, genuine concern, because maybe that's what he needs instead. He rests one hand on Shorter's arm and asks, "Are you okay? You seem... I do not know. Upset? Are you feeling alright?"

Shorter looks stricken for a split second, but then he waves a hand and the expression on his face is so cavalier that Eiji almost thinks he imagined the distress. "Yeah, I'm just... I feel a little sick, I guess. Don't worry about it, though."

Eiji coos in sympathy, glancing toward the kitchen. "Yau-Si said he will make some tea, yes? I hope that helps settle your stomach."

Strangely, Shorter looks even more sick at the mention of Yau-Si's name. Or maybe it's the tea he doesn't want? Maybe he's too nauseous even for that. Eiji chews at his lower lip uncertainly, wondering if he's just made things worse, and tries to smile instead.

"Don't worry," he promises, and pats Shorter's shoulder. "Everything will be just fine. Okay? Do not be scared. Everything will be okay."

    they don't want to lose. they don't want to die. mind comes up blank when she begins taunting them. of course they hate it. the medicine is disgusting. the monitors were a horrible idea. dying was always vaguely on their mind before, especially after kai’s final words... never thought they would lose though. not against this pathetic version of sara. against gin. reko. kanna. q-taro. keiji. humiliating.

    this must have been how he felt when she decided his fate. 

    regrets are such pointless things. you only realise you have them when it’s too late to do anything about it. was always so certain they wouldn’t have any. yet, shin comes to mind. not seeing him for almost three long years. they never had the chance to see the new him. not flat out refusing the use of jou tazuna is another, of course. in the end, they weren’t able to draw the real sara out-- 

    but...

    but then sara smiles. 

    this isn't what they wanted, not really. but seeing it. feeling the pure bloodlust radiating off her from her smile alone, even through the secure lid of the coffin. it's everything they imagined. shin was right to be afraid of her... he's the only smart one in the group.

    "ahaha..." weak at first, then begins to build. hoarse from yelling earlier. it sounds off. from their expression, they are in genuine pain but they're just laughing it away.

    such a shame that this beautiful side of sara only flourishes when they can't do anything about it. when the game is almost over. when they can't fight back. so cruel. though it is what they should have expected. act sweet until the checkmate. so fake. so cunning. so absolutely stunning in a way they can't quite fathom.

    this expression of hers... they're afraid. no more afraid than they were moments ago. it's more than just fear. hand trembles as they reach for the screen. press their fingers against it, over her face. gentle at first and then harder. nails dig in until the screen glitches, leaving an ugly mix of red and black over that smile of hers. she looks half corrupt.

    "there you are. that's it, miss sara." it comes out strained, expression morphing into something close to fondness. the most disgusting, cold kind of fondness.

send me a ship and i’ll tell you who

001....kills the spider

    dojima bc the man know no human fear and adachi is an absolute wimp. the only way adachi would even try is if nanako is scared too and dojima isn’t home...

002....proposed

    dojima. marriage isn’t really something adachi has ever really even considered. doesn’t like being tied down, knows he’ll probably get bored after awhile and wanna move on, bringing law into it is complicated. and thankfully that line of thinking got kicked on its ass when dojima and nanako appear. and dojima is very happy with the thought of his little family, seems kiiiinda traditional and so. would like to put a ring on it--

‘ and that’s the deepest talk we’ve ever had. ’ kaito crosses arms over his chest, pouting just a little as maki cuts off another conversation as soon as they mention something from their childhood. he's trying not to take it out on maki roll, he knows opening up is hard for them. but it's so frustrating sometimes, when they throw all their walls back up them moment they show a touch of vulnerability. unfortunately, he's always been one to wear his heart on his sleeve, for better or for worse.

Kaito's complaint actually stings a little. Maki isn't used to this kind of reaction from him, they're used to him laughing things off with a wide smile and a booming voice. But this time he's actually pouting, actually upset that Maki cut off the conversation from going any further.

There's another part of them that's mad he's even upset at them.

"I'm not one for deep talks," they bite, "don't act like that's surprising to you." They know it was like pulling teeth for him to even get them to befriend him, to give him any kind of chance. They still aren't sure why they ever did, what kind of tricks he pulled to get under their skin and make them weak.

But they are weaker now, and it's all this asshole's fault.

"I can't say I'm sorry I won't talk about that stuff, because I'm not," blunt and to the point as ever. But they've never been one for apologizing, for admitting fault, "You know getting too close to me isn't a good idea, it's practically a death wish." How could they ever have anything normal? Relationship are just tools to be used against your enemy, relationships make people weak.

Kaito makes them so weak. It's disgusting.

Things were getting kind of hairy lately... The metaverse was big but he definitely wasn’t alone in there. It felt as if the day for some sort of altercation was inching nearer and nearer without him even knowing who those other people were.

The phantom thieves, huh... there were rumors they were in his school but his ability to sense other persona users was rusty... or muddled? All his other abilities seemed sharp so he wasn’t too sure.

 Pushing thoughts aside he focused back on his current task; picking out a video game. He needed something to help him relax and games were his go to.

Tracing a finger across the different titles, looking for something retro he stopped, jolting back a bit after accidentally brushing against someone.

"hey partner," it's late, and souji's voice is quiet between them. "if you'd had one of those midnight channel shows, what do you think it would have been?" the question's been eating at him for himself. he has to know if it's just him. | @rhodologies​ sent !

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     What a loaded question--how was he meant to answer something like that? How was he supposed to tell his absolute best friend in the entire world that he had thought about it, too--and that it was ugly. And what about the nightmares? Sometimes he was sure a little voice in the back of his head nagged at him, the voice of the Shadow he was meant to have accepted all that time ago. A creeping darkness, never really gone. How could Yosuke be brutally honest and admit that sometimes he felt as though that darkness would swell and threaten to devour him whole?

     Silence stretched between them for several seconds. As much as he wanted to lie he knew better; Souji knew him too well, knew a lie when he heard it. And Yosuke had never exactly been good at hiding things for long. His partner would call him on his bullshit before he could even get through the first sentence.

     “--Why are you asking something like this?” Just go to sleep, he wanted to say. Stop talking about this and leave it alone. His encounter with his own Shadow had been brief, thankfully, but it had nearly ended in his death. The ordeal had been so horrifying for him that he had actually fainted, and if Souji hadn’t have been there to rescue him...

     A shiver ran through him, and he brushed off the thought to focus instead on the question at hand. “I mean...I dunno. I’ve thought about it. Kinda always figured Junes would come into play somewhere, y’know? Everyone here associates me with it. Even my parents kinda see me as an extension of it, since they’re so involved. And you know people call me the Junes prince and all that shit, so...so I kinda thought maybe it’d be like that. Like Yukiko, but...darker.”

     He didn’t really want to mention that he often saw Junes in ruins, the town below the demolished food court a sea of swirling black. When he had moved here he had hated everything, wanted to tear it all down, to just disappear. Before Souji, Yosuke could have counted the people he liked on one hand and wouldn’t have batted an eye if everyone else just ceased to exist. There had even been a time where if Inaba had fallen into darkness, Yosuke would have gladly let himself go with it.

rimi it’s like i don’t even know who you are anymore